


Phoenix Rising

by millsenberry



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-19
Updated: 2016-01-27
Packaged: 2018-04-27 02:53:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 72,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5030869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/millsenberry/pseuds/millsenberry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Associated with the sun, a phoenix obtains new life by arising from the ashes of death." A Mass Effect 3 Epilogue. Featuring loads of Shenko, a baby & beer (because there's no such thing as too much Shenko, babies & beer.)<br/>***canon***</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: As much as I wish I'd thought up these awesome cocktail names by myself, credit goes to SaveGame for coming up with the recipes. They were so spot-on some of them were even included in the Citadel DLC!**  
  
**If you haven't actually tried Full Biotic Kick yet- what are you waiting for? Kaidan in a glass. Mmm, yes.**

* * *

  
  
Shepard surveyed the small table next to her deck chair with wide, excited eyes. An assortment of cocktails adorned the little reed-woven table, glasses frosty, umbrellas bopping slightly amongst the liquor and ice in the salt-water breeze. Speckles of sand clung to the moisture sweating off the glasses. A six pack of beer sat invitingly on a mound of sand beneath the table, ice cold beneath her toes when she nudged it.  
  
This was Aurora Shepard _heaven_.  
  
The Commander leaned forward to inspect the post-it labels secured under each drink, lifting up her sunglasses to settle on her jet-black fringe and squinting against the strong beach sun. _Full Biotic Kick_. Oh. Hell. Yes. She was definitely drinking that one first. The _Shadowbrokertini_. The blueberries bopping in the bottom on the flute reminded her exactly of her favourite Asari bouncing in excitement at her terminal. The _Heat Sink_. Spirits, indeed. She was definitely popping that shot. The _Tasty Tankbred_. Shepard poked at the contents of the tumbler with a straw. A mix of chocolate sauce, crushed cookies and sprinkles floated at the top of the cocktail on a bed of milky foam. _Eh he he_. She made a mental note to save that drink for dessert.  
  
Shepard sighed happily, peeling the damp label from the _Full Biotic Kick_ and settling back into her deck chair, sliding her sunglasses back into place and closing her vivid green eyes. She balanced the drink on the smooth, taunt expanse of her belly and basked in the warmth of the sun. She couldn't remember the last time she had been to a beach, or had a proper shore leave. Getting drunk on a beach amongst crabs and seaweed had never been high on her list of things to do, as her pale spacer skin was apt to burn when exposed to sunlight for short periods of time. She had opted to spend her last proper furlough with Kaidan in Alaska to see the famous Aurora Borealis lights she had been named after.  
  
Shepard mentally kicked herself for not deciding to spend the second half of their precious shore leave naked and romping in the sand dunes with Kaidan on a beach instead.  
  
Yes, this was heaven. A smorgasbord of alcohol, damaging sun rays and stinky beach air. The Commander was so tired. She had completed the mission she was born to do. She was not going to move from this chair, or this beach. She was going to lay here and drink herself stupid on cocktails and beer. She deserved this, to get drunk and burn her freckled skin to a shade akin to that of cooked lobster.  
  
The whiskey-brown colour of the liquor she held in her hand reminded her exactly of her favourite biotic's deep brown eyes. Making a mental note to save some beers for Kaidan, she raised the drink to the sun, toasting with no one in particular, and held the glass to her lips.  
  
"SKIPPER!"  
  
A sharp voice barking in Shepard's left ear startled her, causing her to accidentally spill the contents of the _Full Biotic Kick_ over her chest and lap. Noting wryly to herself how ironic it was that the cocktail dedicated to her lover had now found itself in all of said lover's favourite places, Shepard grabbed for the towel hanging off the head of her deck chair and sat up, dabbing at the spillage of bourbon and spiced rum staining her one-piece swimsuit. Scowling slightly and hoping that another glass of the cocktail would miraculously reappear on the smorgasbord beside her, she turned to see Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams stretched out on a deck chair beside her.  
  
"Ashley?" Shepard asked, incredulous. Dropping the towel, the Commander gaped at the soldier she thought she had lost on Virmire. "What- what are you doing here?"  
  
Ashley stretched out as lazily across the woven deck chair as one can do whilst wearing Heavy Phoenix armor, resting her armor-clad arms behind her head and craning her neck to look at Shepard. "What am I doing here? I should ask you the same question," the Chief replied, smirking slightly at the dumbstruck expression on her Commander's face. "Didn't I tell you last time not to come back until you'd saved the galaxy from the Reapers? Were old and grey? Married the LT? And drinking alcohol in your condition, no less! Skipper, you should know better than that."  
  
Shepard sheepishly held a hand to her toned, flat stomach, feeling like a child caught sneaking cookies from the cookie jar as a wave of guilt washed over her.  
  
"How do you-?"  
  
The Chief's smirk grew wider. "Let's just say scuttlebut is present everywhere, even in the afterlife."  
  
Ashley surveyed the selection of cocktails on the table beside the deck chairs before reaching for the untouched six-pack of beer. Uncapping the bottle expertly with a twist of her hand, she settled herself back on her deck chair and took a long swig of the beverage, regarding her Commanding Officer with a knowing gaze."This is quite the setup you've got going here, Skipper. Surprised you haven't got visions of the LT prancing around in budgie smugglers."  
  
The Gunnery Chief grinned widely and nudged the Commander with her boot as Shepard blinked at her confusedly. "I'm joking, of course."  
  
"I'm sorry, I'm not following," Shepard admitted, watching Ashley's pink and white armored foot poke her knee.  
  
"Oh Skipper, you're not meant to be here. We've spoken about this already. You aren't ready, same as last time. I don't know why you keep ending up here."  
  
The Chief moved to the side as Shepard flopped back down on her deck chair beside her, her green eyes unfocused as she stared out towards the vast expanse of ocean. "Maybe it's time now," she shrugged. "I'm tired, Ash. So tired."  
  
"Tired, shmired, Skipper," Ashley snorted. "What is wrong with you? You've finally rid the galaxy of the Reapers! You're free to live your life now." Ashley regarded the Commander with a steely gaze. "Don't give up just yet, Shepard. I don't care if you think you're tired. Think of the LT. It will break him if he loses you again. You've never been selfish in your life. No reason to start now."  
  
Shepard snorted at the Gunnery Chief's words. "You think I'm being selfish because I'm tired and want to rest? Haven't I done enough for this galaxy? I just want a _rest_."  
  
"Hey hey now, none of that," Ashley nudged Shepard with her elbow. "You're Commander Shepard. You don't know the meaning of the word "rest". You need to go back and live the life that you deserve. Don't stick around in this shithole. No offence," she quickly added to no one in particular as a rumble of loud thunder sounded in the distance. "It's alright for me. It was my time. There is some pretty great man candy around, and up here, it doesn't matter to anyone that I'm a Williams." The Chief surveyed the surrounding landscape, twitching her nose at the smell of the tangy ocean air. "I fulfilled my life's purpose. Helping you to stop Saren."  
  
Ashley lent forward, resting a hand atop of Shepard's stomach. "You have so much more to live for, Skipper. Saving the galaxy from the Reapers isn't your only purpose in life, you know."  
  
Shepard sighed and placed her own hands on top of Ashley's. "Alright, alright. I'll go," she gave in after a brief pause. "But just one drink first?"  
  
" _No_."  
  
"Hey, I'm still your Commanding Officer. I get to dictate whether I'm allowed one drink or not."  
  
"Up here, I'm the one who's dead, so I outrank you, Skipper. Heaven's overflowing thanks to this war. Get out of here, both of you. That's an order."  
  
It hit the Alliance Commander in an instant. That ever familiar feeling of pain- overwhelming, searing pain. Shepard gasped as her knees buckled from under her, causing her to fall heavily onto the sand. She struggled to inhale, feeling as though her lungs were constricting within her chest, the swimsuit gone as her diaphragm struggling to expand amongst the melted armor seared to her bloodied and burnt skin. Blood pooled from her right leg as sharp tendrils of pain shot up her thigh and into her lower back. Her face burned and throbbed, her eyesight grew hazy. Shepard felt something- no, _someone_ \- poke from the insides of her lower abdomen. She clasped her belly with her burnt hands as she felt a heavy weight roll painfully from within her, as if nudging her to get up and move.  
  
"Get out of here, Skipper," Ashley winked, settling back onto her deck chair as she watched Shepard struggle to hold herself up on all fours in the sand before her. She popped open another beer with a relish. "And make sure you remember me when you're naming that bun in the oven."


	2. Chapter 2

 

Shepard liked to think she had a good ear for music. An attribute she was sure the entire _Normandy_ crew could attest to, given the Commander's tendency to share her great taste with the crew when morale was low. Twenty-first century tunes were always a hit with her. None of this Hanar-squelching, Volus-deep breathing modern techno babble blasted at people from any and every direction in clubs and restaurants these days.  
  
The capacity that sentient beings had for making rhythms and beats out of the strangest items had once fascinated her. Spoons, for example. Shepard herself had be known to tap her cutlery on her tray when she thought herself to be alone in the Mess. It was a nice way to wind down after a mission that did not go entirely to plan, picturing the slimy mounds that passed for meatballs to be the creepy cybernetic eyes of the Illusive Man.  
  
The creaking, rumbling and screeching of twisted metal, enough to make any sane person grit her teeth and set the hairs on her arms on edge, did _not_ fascinate her, however.  
  
And yet, like the squelching and deep breathing that persisted in assaulting the eardrums anywhere that a number of people happened to be congregating at any one time, the screeching and banging of metal and god knows what else was persisting in making sure she couldn't relax enough to drift back off. Very annoying.  
  
Shepard stirred as a particularly loud bang of cascading metal crashed in the distance, shaking her out of her pain-induced stupor. Immediately her senses were assaulted with fire- a blazing fire, not licking but positively engulfing every conceivable part of her body. She felt she had fallen into a vat of melted steel, wielding her ceramic Rosenkov armor to her flesh like a second skin. Her pulse thudded heavily in her ears and she struggled to open her eyes, covered in caked blood and crustier than Varren schnitzel.  
  
She groaned loudly, clenching her eyelids back shut against the onslaught.  
  
The smell of death and burnt flesh wafted into Shepard's singed nostrils, causing her to wheeze and cough uncontrollably, her chest protesting painfully at the effort. Her eyes flew open againt amongst the crusted caked blood, causing her to blink furiously as her tear ducts flooded in protest to the foreign bodies aggravating the delicate whites of her eyes. She made to sit up and gasped as the full extent of her injuries completely overwhelmed her senses, the blazing fire that engulfed her body turning into a raging inferno.  
  
Shepard fell back heavily onto the broken slab of concrete she had landed on in the blast she had caused firing upon the Crucible, moans of pain tearing uncontrollably from her mouth as she took a moment to assess her situation. _I'm alive_ , she thought to herself in surprise. _Holy hell. I feel like death, but I'm alive_.  
  
A tendril of thought threatened to probe at her relief of being alive, but she immediately banished it to the back of her mind. _We're alive_ , she told herself fiercely. _We're both alive_.  
  
It didn't take a genius to know that it would not be for much longer if she didn't whip herself into gear, however. The Commander bit her lip as she tried to raise her left arm, tasting the tang of dried blood and smoke in the thick atmosphere around her. By some miracle, her omni-tool lit to life, blinding her with its bright orange glow in her resting place among the slabs of metal and concrete. Ignoring the sight of the most inner layers of her dermis saying hello to the thick and heavy air, she moved her stiff fingers of her right hand to the omni-tool's holo console, typing as fast as the melted ceramic on her fingers would let her.  
  
A cry escaped her lips as sharp pains stabbed the upper left quadrant of her abdomen, no doubt in protest to the gaping wound she had sustained in the run to the Beam. Shepard gritted her teeth and blinked furiously as she continued to squint at the searing light of her omni-tool, doing her best to ignore the assault on her senses as she struggled to complete the vital task she knew she had to do to get herself out of this potential grave.  
  
_Take a deep breath, soldier. Remember your training. Isolate and block off the pain. It can be controlled if you just put your mind to ignoring it. You're going to get out of here. You are both going to get out of here. Back to Kaidan. You just need to hang on._  
  
The omni-tool finally began to ping, signaling the activation of a distress call Alliance leaders had programmed into their tools. It was twenty-first century tune relief to her ears. The Commander groaned in satisfaction, relinquishing the muscles in her left arm to fall back down to her side as fatigue and pain overwhelmed her. She had done all she could.  
  
Shepard clasped her burnt and blooded hands across her lower belly, mumbled something incoherent in the thick atmosphere of the Crucible, and closed her eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

 In another place and another lifetime, Doctor Chloe Michel might once have enjoyed being personally escorted to a trauma scene with an armed guard of Citadel Security officers armed to the teeth with guns. She was quite partial to a man with a gun; the whole "protector of the damsel in distress" dream was something she enjoyed fantasizing at night. Particularly alien men with a gun.

The squad, consisting of Commander Bailey, four other human soldiers and a Drell, were surrounded by an eerie blue glow of the Drell's extended biotic barriers cloaking the group. The officers were hustling the doctor as fast as their weary legs could carry them to the nearest C-Sec sky car lot, intent on their mission.

As she struggled to keep pace with the commander in charge of Citadel Security operations in the Human Embassy, Michel thanked her lucky stars that she agreed to conduct health assessments on human C-Sec officers, and had been present in an office full of armed saviors trained in the wonder of explosive weaponry when the Reapers tore through the relay into the Serpent Nebula to occupy the Citadel. The large glass windows of the Human Embassy's sickbay, once boasting a spectacular view of the Presidium and its surrounding buildings, had also boasted the doctor a disturbing view of Reaper troops storming the boulevards of the Presidium. Huerta Memorial Hospital was also clearly in view from her station. She had clenched her eyes shut in disbelief and held back tears as she watched people flung through the glass windows of the hospital into the depths of the water below, the splatter of red and blue blood alike clearly visible on the broken glass from her position over a kilometer away. Screaming, wailing and the sound of firing weapons echoed across the Presidium Lake as the carnage and harvest begun. The Reapers had finally come to the Citadel.

The doctor, who had crouched fetus-style for what had seemed like days in the safe room of the offices amongst other civilians fortunate enough to be at the Human Embassy at the time of the take-over, could not believe her eyes when Commander Bailey had unlocked the safe room and flung open the doors, trying to remain calm but barely containing his relief when he announced that Reaper forces across the station had mysteriously stopped their attack and ceased to function. He had woven his way towards the doctor amongst the massive exodus of civilians out of the safe room, intent on pulling her aside.

No one had explained to her yet why she was being escorted with armed C-Sec officers, resuscitation and trauma equipment retrieved from who knows where in tow. She could only assume that she was being taken to attend to the Citadel Councilors. Who else was important enough to warrant a rescue as soon as the Reapers had miraculously been defeated, when there were so many injured and dying in the wards and passageways of the station?

The squad passed a bloodied and wailing Asari, cradling her obviously dead Turian lover in her arms, his talons severed and pooling blood at her feet, the smell of burnt flesh thick and heavy in the air. She averted the Asari's distraught eyes, knowing there was nothing she could do for them at the moment. The backside of Commander Armando-Owen Bailey was looking pretty good in comparison to the sickening remains of the Reaper's harvest right now.

Michel shook her head and hitched her resuscitation pack more securely on her shoulders, focusing on the task ahead and trying to ignore the further carnage littering the passageways of the Citadel, bodies of citizens and Reapers alike. Beside her, a hovering trolley filled to the brim with everything she would need in an emergent trauma situation glided beside her, nicking the heels of Bailey, much to his annoyance.

"Who is it exactly we are going to rescue, Commander Bailey?" she huffed in her thick French accent as they reached the C-Sec sky car lot, a shuttle already puttering as it waited for its passengers. Bailey's fingers flew over his omni-tool as the shuttle's doors opened, muttering orders to his men as the Drell practically hoisted the doctor into the shuttle and secured her safely into a seat beside the doorway leading to the cockpit.

"Worked out that we're going to rescue somebody, have you?" Bailey turned towards the doctor, fatigue laced throughout his deep voice.

"It doesn't take a genius to work it out, Commander Bailey," Michel replied. "I assume it is someone considered incredibly important, given that we are ignoring the needs of other injured and dying citizens of the station?"

As the other members of the squad latched themselves securely to the ceiling rails, Bailey regarded the doctor with his steely blue eyes. Doctor Michel dipped her head towards him, motioning him to answer her question.

"What I'm about to tell you is technically classified under Alliance channels, Doctor Michel," Bailey continued. "The identity of the person we are going to rescue must be kept secret for her safety."

The occupants of the shuttle jostled as the vehicle took to the air. Michel nodded, signally him to go on.

"You've probably realized by now that somehow, the Reapers have been defeated," Bailey continued. Behind him, one of the heavily armed officers sniffed loudly, his head hung low as in prayer. "The Alliance has been working in secret alongside with the Citadel Council to build a secret weapon that was designed to destroy the Reapers. Commander Shepard was put in charge of uniting the galaxy to build a fleet capable of laying a surprise siege to the Reapers while the weapon was put in place. I don't have to tell you that the Reapers taking over the station significantly disrupted those plans."

Bailey brought up his fatigue-clad forearm as his omni-tool flickered to life, tapping at the holo console and projecting what appeared to be a map with a flashing pinpoint into the atmosphere of the shuttle before them. "All Alliance admirals, officials and commanding officers have encrypted distress beacons programmed into their tools. Not long after Reapers across the station were beginning to pick off like flies, this distress signal was picked up in our Human Embassy office. It's coming from the highest point of the Citadel Tower, somewhere that we never even knew existed. It's never been accessed since the Citadel has been occupied. Standing orders state that launching a rescue is of up most priority, even amongst all of the crap going about on the station right now."

Michel nodded her acknowledgement that she understood. Bailey took a deep breath and turned to watch towards the cockpit, watching the buildings atop of smoking and destroyed Citadel arms pass as the shuttle slowly made its way to the apex of the Citadel Tower. As the shuttle's inertial dampers compensated for the outside turbulence and the squad held tightly to the railings in an effort to keep steady, Michel's eye was caught by a bright green sticker that appeared to be stuck on the wall atop of a life support vent.

 _Politicians are the weeds of the galaxy_. Michel raised her eyebrows.

"Who does the distress signal belong to?" Michel asked.

"Sir, if you have a moment?" the pilot of the shuttle called from the cockpit. Bailey grasped the railings attached to the ceiling tightly and made his way to the pilot. She could barely make out the discussion between the two officers, trying to avoid the gaze of the Drell as he watched her with black, soulful eyes.

The doctor avoided his gaze in discomfort.

A loud verse of cursing emanated from the cockpit in the deep voice of the C-Sec Commander. "Brace yourself, men," Bailey ordered, swinging back into the seating area of the shuttle. "We have to clear a path in the debris to get to our target with the shuttle's weapons. Might be a bit of a bumpier ride from here."

Michel turned a shade as green as Bailey's bumper sticker.

* * *

The doctor had never worn a breathing mask before. She had never needed to in her career as a medical officer, only having worked in well-ventilated clinics supported by life support systems. It seemed to mess with her sense of spatial awareness, having the apparatus strapped to her face. She realized that she had been ordered to wear it by Bailey due to the poorly oxygenated environment they were slowly making their way through to get to the target, but given she was huffing and puffing like she had climbed Mount Everest back on Earth, she felt she could probably have fared better without it.

It had not taken long to find their target once the C-Sec shuttle had landed amongst the debris of shattered concrete and twisted metal, remnants of the Crucible's explosion and the shuttle's merciless weaponry. The C-Sec officer had hustled the group as fast as their legs could carry them across what could only have been compared to no man's land. Bailey barked at his men as the distress signal tracker emanating from his omni-tool indicated that the source was beneath an ominous pile of rubble to the left of their direction, the squad kicking into a uniformed gear as they took position to carefully remove the debris burying their target.

A shocked squeak escaped Doctor Michel as a mangled and bloodied body slowly came into view, Bailey's men working faster as their efforts yielded them closer towards their goal of retrieving the target. Michel had never seen another being in such a state. The target, obviously a woman, was covered in third degree burns, the remains of her ceramic armor seared to what remained of her skin. A solider, obviously. Her platinum Alliance dog tags remained unmarked resting atop of the charred and melted remains of her armor's breastplate, the designation of N7 red clearly visible. Michel's eyes quickly scanned the woman as the rest of her body was slowly freed by Bailey's men, the C-Sec Commander's bellowing in her ear drowned out by the pulsating in her eardrums as her adrenaline kicked in.

At the moment, the platinum tags adorning her neck would be the only way of recognizing the woman. Her hair was singed to her scalp, what remained of her face swollen and bruised. Her right leg was mangled beneath a particularly large chunk of concrete that was unrelenting to the squad's attempts to remove off her limb, the woman lying in a dried pool of her own blood. Doctor Michel offered up a quick prayer and knelt beside the woman, instructing Bailey's men to bring her equipment beside her.

_Assess the patient's airway._

Michel pried open the woman's swollen mouth, yelling at the Drell to angle his omni-tool light so that she could peer into the soldier's mouth. She was breathing, but barely. The back of her throat was caked with soot, her airways swollen, blooding pooling within her mouth. Michel suctioned out the blood as best as she could and fumbled through her pack for an artificial airway, ripping through the sterile plastic while instructing the Drell to tilt the soldier's neck back so that she could angle the L-shaped tubing into her mouth. She gritted her teeth as the swollen airway of the soldier made it difficult, praying that the soldier would remain unconscious as she forced the tubing into the soldier's trachea.

After connecting the artificial airway to the portable oxygen pump attached to the hovering resuscitation trolley beside her, the doctor activated her omni-tool and scanned the soldier's body, assessing her lung sounds and heart rhythm. Breath sounds were absent from her left chest, indicative of a collapsed lung. Not a good sign. She fumbled amongst her supplies for a long syringe designed specifically for releasing the tension created by a pneumothorax, plunging it between the woman's fourth and fifth intercostal spaces amid the melted armor. A hiss projected from the attachment site of the needle, indicating the re-inflation of the woman's left lung. She nodded to herself as she saw the immediate improvement in the soldier's breathing.

_Check for a pulse and circulation._

The woman's heartbeat was present but slow and thready, her circulation to her extremities clearly compromised. Michel hastily prepped a makeshift sterile field amongst the remains of the explosion to gain access to the woman's circulation, attaching a bag of intravenous fluids to the cannula she had expertly inserted into the delicate vein beneath the soldier's burnt flesh.

_Damage control._

Michel's heart felt like lead in her chest as she assessed the state of the soldier's right leg. She doubted that with supplies stretched as thin as they were thanks to the war and the environment the woman had laid in for the past forty-eight hours, it was highly unlikely that the leg could be saved. Assuming the soldier's other life-threatening injuries didn't kill her first. Her hands fumbled as she sorted through her supplies intently searching for anything she could use to pack the soldier's gaping abdominal wound. An assortment of supplies spilled around her from her pack as she knelt beside the dying soldier, hastily trying to get her bearings and source the sterile supplies she needed amongst the mess.

When Michel was satisfied she had done all she could to stabilize the solider for transport, the doctor retrieved a neck brace from her resuscitation trolley and, motioning the Bailey and his guards to help stabilize the woman, instructed everyone to carefully roll her onto her side, the glow of the Drell's biotics helping to keep the soldier's spine straight as she secured the neck of the woman to prevent causing any further spinal damage.

Despite the swift movement of the squad sliding the woman delicately onto the awaiting stretcher, the soldier's eyes flew open, a sickening gurgle emanating from her bloodied and bruised mouth as she struggled against the artificial airway that had been forced into her swollen trachea. The restraints of stretcher stabilizing the soldier were all that prevented her from rolling off of the hovering stretcher. Her eyes moved frantically as she assessed her surroundings, the sclera of her eyes as red as blood. Eyes Michel had seen before. There was no mistaking the vividness of those green eyes.

The doctor grasped the N7 dog tags adorning the woman's neck. "Commander Shepard?" Michel gasped.

Shepard spluttered and gurgled, resisting the artificial tubing as she struggled to form words. "BAAA," she repeated as best as she could, the airway allowing little flexibility to form something intelligible. "EEE," she continued, blood spilling from her mouth. She convulsed against her restraints, struggling to convey to the doctor that she was not the only person present that needed to be saved.

"Commander? Commander!" I need you to stay as still as possible!" the doctor ordered, vainly trying to hold down the injured woman. "You're injuries are extensive! If you keep moving, you will make things worse for yourself!"

Shepard's flailing hands grasped Michel's gloved ones, pulling them down to the melted ceramic of her armor wielded to her abdomen. Her pleading eyes bore into the doctor's as she struggled to voice what she couldn't through words.

Michel's eyes widened, pushing Shepard's hands away as she realized what the soldier was trying to tell her in order to raise her omni-tool and place it over the Commander's stomach, hastily searching for a program she had not used since her internship days. She turned up the volume of the omni-tool and held her gloved hand above Shepard's abdomen, the Commander lying as silent and still as she could in her agony as she realized that the doctor had understood.

Over the creaking sound of the Citadel twisting in the void, the tell-tale sound of a rapid, sparrow-like heartbeat flooded the thick atmosphere. A thick, gargled cry of relief escaped from the Commander's swollen and bloodied lips.


	4. Chapter 4

 

The Loft was eerie. Silent. Despite its occupants, a thick cloud hung heavily within the living quarters, flecks of dust swirling as the _Normandy_ 's battered life support systems struggled to recycle the air. The space hamster ran laps on his little mill within his enclosure, his energetic squeaks peppering the thick atmosphere of the cabin. The few fish that had survived Shepard's ministrations swam endless circles in the generous expanse of their tank, the occasional squeak of "Dinner time, fishies!" of the aquarium VI going unnoticed as it periodically released fish food into the water, long desensitized to present ears.

The Alliance Major was sprawled over the king-sized bed, savoring the drowsiness that his migraine narcotics gave him, his nose buried in the folds of Shepard's N7 hooded jacket. He took in deep breaths of her scent clinging to the material. Her smell of sandalwood soap still lingered in the haphazard tumble of bed sheets, stray black hairs clinging to the pillow covers, streaking red and dark brown highlights when caught in the light. The bed had not been made since the Major had last made love to the Commander before the assault on the Cerberus base. He couldn't bring himself to straighten the sheets that Shepard had kicked aside in her haste to relieve him of his clothing, and grasped in the throes of their lovemaking.

He hadn't even bothered removing the pile of damp towels festering on the sofa, long-forgotten as he and Shepard had stepped out of their shower together with an intent of making it back to the bed for round two.

Kaidan was starting to doubt his leadership abilities. Give him a group of hormonal adolescents whose only concerns in life were "the big adventure", the opposite sex and cherry flavoured omnistick, and he could confidently whip them into shape in a manner that earned the respect of his students and turned them into capable soldiers. Give him a team of the galaxy's best and brightest, previously led by the toughest, strongest woman in Alliance military, and he didn't have the faintest clue where to begin. He had a pilot who was seemingly drowning in the throes of grief- akin to the same grief he himself had gone through over two years ago. Figuratively drowning, of course. Joker had commandeered the bridge of the Normandy as his new living quarters, refusing most meals and shutting down anyone who tried to talk to him. He refused to speak of EDI when prompted, instead attaching himself to his headset with the intent blocking out all external stimuli. Doctor Chakwas, who had grudgingly admitted to Kaidan psychology and mental health had never been her forte and yet had somehow ended up as the ship's medical doctor _and_ counsellor, was ready to throw in her soft, expensive British towels and give up.

The _Normandy_ 'screw were not faring much better. Her crew were barely managing their duties as they battled the onset of depression, going about their work as the old and battered girl slowly limped back to the Sol system through faster-than-light travel.

Kaidan wished he could channel Shepard. Right now, the crew needed her reassuring words of encouragement, her spark that made even the most skeptical soldier follow her to the ends of the universe and back. Telling the crew that they would make it back to Earth no matter how long it took just didn't sound as sincere as it would have through her lips, in her stern yet gentle voice that could talk sociopaths out of putting bullets through heads, or talk male Krogans into getting off their behinds and going for a sojourn in the female camp.

Kaidan took another deep inhale of Shepard's scent, ignoring the fish aquarium's VI as it started to sing the fish nursery rhymes. There was no doubt in his mind that Shepard had survived the final battle. It was something he felt in his gut, in a place of his heart that he knew science or medicine could not explain. He had known the first time Shepard had lost her life. As he had watched the original _Normandy_ disintegrate before him from the escape pod's window, he had been overwhelmed by sharp, stabbing pains in his chest, causing him to double over amongst his safety harness. The then-lieutenant had struggled for breath as his eyes flooded with tears, _knowing_ somehow that the love of his life was dying out there in that great expanse.

This time, Kaidan felt nothing except the occasional pain in his side, a left knee that suddenly decided it was going through the early stages of arthritis, and the definite knowledge that his Shepard was alive, and waiting for him.

" _Major Alenko?"_ The loud, accented voice of Samantha Traynor sounding over the comm yanked him out of his stupor, originally induced by his migraine narcotics but maintained by daydreams of a green-eyed Commander. Kaidan jerked upwards off of the bed, groaning as his migraine protested to the sudden movement. _"There's an incoming message from Alliance Command coming over the secondary QEC. You should take this call, Major."_

"On my way, Specialist," Kaidan mumbled as he smoothed out Shepard's hoodie on the bed, hoisted on his combat boots, and slowly made his way to the Loft elevator, his mind on Shepard's freckled nose, her knowing smile, her vivacious green eyes.


	5. Chapter 5

Kolyat Krios was knocked out of his boredom-induced stupor by the intensive care nurse ramming her trolley accidentally into his armchair. Blinking profusely to rid himself of the haze that had overcome him during his bedside vigil, he turned his soulful dark eyes on the nurse, watching as she mumbled and swore to herself while collecting the packets of sterile cannulas and unused syringes off of the pristine clean floors. She reminded him of a Rachni soldier, dutifully serving its queen and attending to her every need and whim as she bustled around her patient in the intensive care unit.

He smiled wryly to himself as he pictured the unimpressed look on Shepard's face if she knew he was comparing her to the Rachni queen.

Kolyat turned his eyes back to his charge. Five days in intensive care, and there had been no changes. Shepard seemed almost lifeless in her medically-induced coma. Despite the steady beeping of the machines keeping her alive, she looked almost peaceful - or as peaceful as one could look bruised, battered, hair singed to the scalp, barely alive. He could imagine how anguished his father would have been at the sight of his beloved _Siha_ in so much pain. Kolyat hugged his father's prayer book closer to his chest.

The life support machine chugged away, pushing oxygen into Shepard's lungs and sucking out the waste. It was a sad-looking older contraption from the 21st century, dug out of the forgotten basements of the old Alliance hospital to replace equipment damaged and lost in the Reaper war. Functioning and reliable hospital equipment was currently scarce, even for the Saviour of the Galaxy. As long as it did its job, it was deemed useable and brought out of storage to treat the masses. The respirator tubing inched in and out of the Commander's pale dry lips in time with her respirations as it breathed for her, her face speckled with swollen bruises and cuts. If it weren't for her identification bands, bedhead label and security detail positioned outside of her hospital door, the first Human Spectre was completely unrecognizable. Used to seeing her in the extranet vids and in person as a human woman, soldier and leader responsible for saving the galaxy from the Reapers, it was a slap to the face to see the Commander looking so vulnerable and fragile in the hospital bed.

Whilst the nurse bustled around administering to Shepard's intravenous lines, Kolyat turned his attention across the room to the clear window at the left, separating the sparseness and sterility of the intensive care room from the doctor's bay located behind it. He watched Doctor Michel working away at her terminal, an old-school lead pencil between her teeth and a determined look on her face as she perused some of Shepard's scans. He felt a little flurry of excitement in his chest that he had been experiencing for the past few days since they had rescued Shepard from the ruins of the Citadel, and a feeling of warmth overcome him every time he laid eyes on the beautiful doctor. He was not sure if it was admiration that Michel had personally taken on the role of consultant doctor of Shepard's care, maintaining a faithful vigil in the bay overlooking her room between sleeping and meals, or that he was partial to her shiny auburn hair and bright hazel eyes.

 _Kalahira_ just didn't make Drell women as fascinating as Doctor Michel anymore.

Michel eyes wandered from her scans of Shepard's insides and locked with Kolyat's dark ones, turning her cheeks an instant red to match her hair and dropping the pencil from between her teeth into her lap. She smiled at Kolyat shyly whilst blushing profusely, before abandoning her terminal to turn on a battered looking coffee machine located on a bench in the corner of the doctor's bay. As the machine hissed and spat out copious amounts of steam, Kolyat watched as a battle-hardened man in dress blues and Admiral hat silently slithered into the doorway of the bay, unbeknownst to the good doctor.

 _That man would have made a very successful assassin,_ the Drell noted to himself.

Kolyat took a deep sigh and leaned forward towards the bottom of Shepard's bed wearily, crossing his arms and resting his head amongst her neatly tucked hospital blankets. The Drell could feel his fatigue getting the better of him again, beckoning him into the haze that he had passed the time by at Shepard's bedside since he helped rescue her on the Citadel. He prayed to _Kalahira_ that the Commander would be healed enough to be wakened soon. His heart sank as he noted the lack of human limb cushioning his head as it rested, where the Commander's right leg should have been.

* * *

"Admiral Hackett!" Doctor Michel grasped at her cup of hot coffee so as not to spill in her surprise to see the Alliance leader looming above her in the doorway. "I was not expecting you to make it to Vancouver until this evening!"

"A slight miscalculation in ETA," Admiral Hackett replied with a small smile, his harsh features softening as he began to engage with the doctor. Straightening his dress blues absent-mindedly, he stepped up to the window of Shepard's hospital room, scanning the room with the eyes of a long-standing Alliance marine as he automatically checked for any hints of danger. His breath fogged up against the glass as he surveyed Shepard in her hospital bed connected to an array of tubes and monitors, before resting on the Drell faithfully keeping his bedside vigil.

"Any updates on the Commander since I last spoke to you?"

"I'm afraid not very much, Admiral," Doctor Michel balanced her coffee cup carefully as she came to stand beside Hackett at the glass. "I was in fact just perusing the Commander's latest scans from earlier this morning. My simulations are showing that if we were to wake up the Commander now, we would not be able to control her pain levels yet without the heavy use of opioid and narcotic analgesia. Whilst we were able to proactively stop the spread of infection and gangrene by amputating her leg and avoiding sepsis, shortages in specialised medi-gel safe for Category C expectant patients mean that we will have to revert to older types of analgesia. To say that the Commander will be in excruciating pain is an understatement. Too much risk of birth defects and opioid dependence for her unborn child when he or she is born if we were to wake her now and utilize these medications. Shepard will require more time in the coma to prepare her for a little while yet. "

Hackett nodded, processing the barrage of medical terminology the doctor had delivered in her thick French accent. He had never been good at fully understanding those with accents without the assistance of his electronic translator he always kept equipped for interactions with other races.

"I will be entirely honest with you though Admiral... Shepard and her child are not out of the woods yet," Michel added softly. "Whilst she is stable for now..." the good doctor paused, steam from her cup making her eyes water. "We have no way of knowing how her body will cope from the medically-induced coma. It may come time to wake her and we might not be successful. In my medical experience, anyone else would have succumbed to such injuries. You know as well as I do that with the medical equipment and supplies that we have available at the moment, I can not ever guarantee that we will get her through this with a full recovery."

"God help her," Hackett muttered under his breath, his haggard face forlorn as he surveyed the battle-hardened marine fight on, even in a state of unconsciousness. There was never going to be any rest for the soldier. After securing victory for the entire galaxy, Commander Shepard still had another battle to win.


	6. Chapter 6

 

Kaidan picked up the speed in his step as he made his way out of the lift and through the _Normandy_ 's Combat Information Centre, past Specialist Traynor and through the adjourning automatic doors that led passed the communications hub to the War Room. The crews' low and flat affect at facing a slow trudge through multiple systems light years away from Sol dominated thickly and heavily in the air. What euphoria the crew had initially felt knowing that the war had ended and the Reapers were defeated had quickly turned to a state of depression when it became evident that their Commanding Officer had most likely perished in the final battle, the ship's beloved artificial intelligence had joined her, the Mass Relays had been destroyed beyond repair, and an ETA of approximately four months of faster-than-light travel back to Earth awaited them.

It was still taking time for Kaidan to get used to the state of chaotic disrepair in most areas of the ship. Severely damaged by the Mass Relay explosion they had narrowly escaped and without EDI to guide the crew in their repairs, the frigate had certainly seen better days. The _Normandy_ had not sustained so much damage since her previous sojourn under Commander Shepard to the Collector's base, despite Shepard's vigilance in ensuring that the ship was equipped sufficiently for battle. Probing planets on end for over a week had been a small price for the impatient Commander to pay to ensure that the _Normandy_ 's defenses could be upgraded with Cyclonic Barrier Technology and Silaris ablative armor.

In the small space of less than a week since they had crash-landed and in a haste to start the long journey back to the Sol system, the _Normandy_ 's crew had had to scrimp, compensate and go without performing makeshift repairs on certain systems deemed "unnecessary" in the grand scheme of getting the Alliance frigate safe and space-worthy. With the promise of commencing a long and exhausting journey back to Earth, the crew had worked around the clock to ensure that the ship was ready for travel as fast as humanely possible. Equipment had been stripped of any materials that could have been used to bring the old girl back to a state where she could safely fly her eager occupants back to their home system. Supplies had been stocked with what limited safe food and water they could collect from the uninhabited planet that they had crashed on, the probe bay almost depleted as they had scanned for dextro-amino food supplies on each planet that they trudged past. Without access to the extranet, it was impossible to pinpoint any certain planets that would harbour appropriate food for the on-board dextros to consume safely.

When Kaidan looked at their situation realistically, the _Normandy_ 's crew had been extremely fortunate in the circumstances of their crash landing. After flying a shuttle into the planet's atmosphere to extrapolate their approximate location in the galaxy by mapping out the stars, Specialist Traynor had been able to ascertain that they had landed on an uninhabited but liveable planet in the Exodus Cluster. Kaidan thanked his lucky stars that Vega had not crashed the shuttle on their descent back to the planet, sorely wishing that he had not insisted Cortez retire for the day, having overworked himself during the past forty-two hour period. Thanks to Shepard's insistence in upgrading the _Normandy_ with extended fuel cells based on Asari technology and a supply of reserve fuel stocked in the ship's cargo bay for emergencies, Joker had in his grief-induced stupor mumbled in a voice barely-audible that it would take the old girl approximately four months to reach the Sol system "the old fashioned way". Joker's estimate did not include the numerous resources in elements, gases and precious metals that the Commander had sourced throughout their travels, which Tali and Engineer Adams had assured Kaidan could be utilized on the last leg of the journey home as a fuel for the ship if the grieving pilot's estimates fell short.

The promise of getting back home to an Earth that had somehow managed to survive the Reaper war seemed the only positive prospect for the crew facing a long journey in a ship struggling to hold her own hull together. Without the knowledge of whether family and loved ones had survived the war, it was all the crew could look forward to. They had all known of the relationship between Shepard and Major Alenko. Knowing that their XO was as in-the-dark about whether or not his lover had survived was small comfort to the crew, preoccupied with the losses they faced themselves and an uncertain future now that humanity was no longer facing extinction.

Communication from the Alliance had been fleeting since the _Normandy_ had been able to establish connection through the undamaged secondary QEC back to the remnants of the human government in the Sol system. Admiral Steven Hackett had stepped up to the leadership of the Alliance after the demise of his superiors and comrades in the war, and his fleet had survived the final battle largely intact thanks to his ministrations. It had been a big relief to the _Normandy_ when they had been successful in establishing and maintaining the fragile connection without the assistance of EDI. The eruption of cheers and clapping amongst Shepard's squad members who were present with Kaidan as they received confirmation from Hackett himself that Commander Shepard had indeed been successful in activating the Crucible was short-lived when he regrettably informed them that their leader was currently missing in action, presumed dead. Her whereabouts completely unknown.

Kaidan hurried through the War Room to the room beyond, thankful for an update from Alliance Command and eager not to keep Hackett waiting. He dared not hope that there would be any news on Shepard, and whether the Alliance had been successful in locating her.

As Kaidan entered the Quantum Entanglement Communications room, the silhouette of a figure clad in the dress blues of a Rear Admiral puttered and blinked in front him, her back turned towards the entrance as she conversed with another person on her side of the QEC. When Kaidan stepped onto the communication platform as Shepard had done so many times before him, the silhouette turned to face him and he gasped aloud as he was met with the face of a much older, intimidating-looking version of Commander Shepard.

Despite his shock, Kaidan immediately stood to attention and saluted the figure looming before him.

"Rea-Re-rear Admiral She-Shepard," he stuttered, his heart pumping painfully away in his chest as he took in the oh-so-similar features of his lover's in her mother projected before him.

"At ease, Major Alenko," Rear Admiral Hannah Shepard saluted the Major in return, her hands dropping to rest by her side as he took a more casual stance before her. "It has certainly been a long time since I saw you last, Major."

"Indeed it has, ma'am," Kaidan replied, leaning forward to rest his arms on the platform before him. "I haven't seen you since... since..."

"Ahhh yes," Hannah Shepard nodded, her face softening as she remembered the circumstances of their first meeting. "Almost four years now, hasn't it been, Kaidan? You are looking very well considering the stress you must be going through at the moment. How are you at the _Normandy_ 's crew holding up?"

"As well as can be, ma'am-"

"Call me Hannah, please."

"Hannah." It felt strange, disrespectful somehow, to address the mother of his affections so informally given her ranking within the Alliance military. He did not feel any more relaxed as Hannah smiled at him encouragingly and continued on. "As well as can be, Hannah. The crew have worked non-stop this past week to get the _Normandy_ into space-worthy condition. It has been a struggle, to say the least. We have ascertained our location and have enough supplies to get us home to Earth. We have already commenced the first leg of the journey home. It is going to be a long and tough one, but knowing that Earth will still be there now when we get back is giving the crew what they need to charge on, something to look ahead to."

Hannah nodded. "And what of Aurora's team, Kaidan? How are they faring? I would imagine that they are eager to get back to their homeworlds and assist in the rebuilding."

"They haven't been too preoccupied with that, to be honest. I have had multiple debriefings with them throughout the week. They have all been adamant that the first place to go to is Earth. They want to assist wherever they can with the Alliance first, find out..."

Kaidan couldn't quite bring himself to say what he was thinking directly to Shepard's mother. It would certainly take a jerk to remind a grieving mother that her only child had most likely died, _again_.

"About that... I am sure you are wondering why I took the liberty to contact you on Admiral Hackett's QEC."

Kaidan's heart skipped a noticeable beat in his chest as a small tendril of hope he was unsuccessfully keeping harboured sprouted into fruition.

"I'll be honest ma'am, I was certainly not expecting it to be you when I was notified of an incoming call."

Hannah Shepard, intimidating as she was, visibly succumbed to the image of a mother long worried and tortured in her time before his very eyes, the Rear Admiral facade faltering. Kaidan couldn't quite tell, but it seemed that she was trying to blink back tears welling in her soft green eyes, a stark contrast to her daughter's vivaciously bright green ones. "I was fortunate that the _Orizaba_ had finally reached Earth with Admiral Hackett's fleet this morning. My brother took a shuttle down to Vancouver as soon as he was able..." She paused, taking in a deep shuddering breath.

Kaidan could feel his blood pulsating fervently in his ears, unconsciously bracing himself on the QEC platform beneath his hands.

 _Say it. Please, please say it_. _She's alive. She made it_.

Hannah Shepard, hardened through the decades of military experience service and stress, had never been good at articulating words that required a degree of tact, delicacy or emotion. It had always been one of her ways to "tell things like it is", an attribute that had frustrated her daughter to no end. She had been incapable of informing her small child of four years that her father had perished whilst serving with the Alliance with anything but cold, hard facts. Her brother Steven had had to step up and take on the role of delicately explaining to the confused child that her father would not be returning. When an adolescent Shepard, just reaching her pubescent years had come wailing out of the bathroom adamant that she was dying, Hannah had matter-of-factly informed her that it was just her lady parts preparing her body to house little Shepards one day. When Shepard had informed her on her eighteenth birthday that she was enlisting with the Alliance, Hannah had told her without a hint of emotion that she expected her daughter to make her and her father proud, before promptly shutting herself away in her room and sliding to the floor, devastated that the one career path she so desperately did not want her only child to take would one day claim her life like as it had done her father's.

Seeing the man who so desperately loved her daughter looking so grieved and exhausted before her, Hannah decided not to mince any more words and get straight to the point of her call.

"The Alliance found Aurora five days ago, Kaidan."

Silence, puckered by the ongoing hum of the ship around them, immediately followed. It took Kaidan a moment to catch his breath; unbeknownst to him, he had been holding it as he prayed that Hannah was delivering the news he so desperately need to hear.

"Alive? Tell me she is alive."

"She is alive. Barely, but alive."

As the communication line through the QEC's flickered and hummed dramatically with passing interference, Hannah watched as the Major crumpled before her on the floor to his knees. Memories of the very same Major, devastated and broken at Shepard's funeral came flooding back to Hannah as she watched him collect himself on the floor of the Normandy's QEC room. He looked up at her image, his hands holding himself upright, his chest heaving, tears welling in his eyes.

"Where is she now, Hannah?" the Major gasped.

"An Alliance hospital, back on Earth in Vancouver," Hannah informed him. As overcome as he was with the news that his Shepard had survived, Kaidan could not missed the obvious worry outlined in her voice. "Steven is currently there getting an update on her progress. I could not bring myself to go down there at the moment. She... she isn't in a good state, Kaidan."

"What do you mean? What's wrong with her? What happened?"

"To be honest I had a bit of difficulty understanding the medical terminology and jargon. My understanding is that Citadel Security located her just in time after she managed to activate an emergency beacon... She had significant life-threatening internal injuries, extensive third degree burns, her right leg has been..." her voice trailed off. "Dr Michel has assured me that she and her team are doing everything that they can for her, and I am hopeful that she will pull through, but a part of me can't help but want to prepare, just in case..."

Kaidan slowly pushed himself off his knees to standing position, his legs feeling weak and wobbly beneath him in his elation. "She is alive though. That is the main thing. You know Aurora better than I do, Hannah. She will pull through this. She did not come back from death and rid the Galaxy of the Reapers, only for this to be the end for her now." Positively buzzing to hear that Shepard had survived the firing and destruction of the Crucible, it was impossible for Kaidan to even comprehend that Shepard might still be in danger. "I just can't... I mean I dared hope but I didn't think... I just _knew_ she was still alive. _I knew it_."

"You are certainly more positive than I could ever be, Kaidan," Hannah smiled sadly at the Major. "I can see why you and Aurora are so suited to each other."

"Is she conscious? Does she know what's happened?" Kaidan asked eagerly.

"She is in a medically-induced coma for now. The doctors seem to think it is the best way to facilitate healing at the moment, give her time to recuperate from her extensive injuries so that she will be able to cope when they wake her. Not even the most astounding pain threshold would prepare a soldier to bear the pain that she would have had to had she been conscious this whole time. It is... hard to think or speak of, as her mother."

Kaidan nodded, the thought of Shepard suffering more pain tugging at his pounding heart. "I completely understand, Hannah. I won't ask you to go into any more details at the present. Can the Alliance to contact the Normandy whenever there is news on her recovery? Any chance that we might be able to receive communication from her doctors about her condition via the QEC? The crew will be so pleased to hear that she has been found alive!"

Hannah smiled wearily at the Major. "I will speak to my brother about keeping you and your crew informed of Aurora's recovery. I daresay it will make a significant difference in team moral, given the long journey you are facing to return to Sol. Let me speak to Steven. There should be no reason that the Alliance would be reluctant to instigate regular updates given everything that you and your crew has done with Aurora during this war. It would certainly be the least that they can do." Hannah raised her right hand in salute to the Major. "I will let you get back to the _Normandy_ 's crew and inform them all of the good news, Major Alenko."

"Ai ai, ma'am!" Kaidan snapped to attention and saluted back the Rear Admiral respectfully, unable to stop the biggest smile of relief that had spread heavily across his exhausted features. Hannah waited and watched as he stepped off of the QEC projection platform and disappeared hastily from view. Following suit on her own platform, she sighed heavily and rubbed her eyes, glistening and burning from the tears she had struggled to hold back during conversation with her daughter's love interest. She knew that she should have told Kaidan that Shepard was expecting, but characteristic of her manner felt it was not something she would have been comfortable doing. Besides, it was her daughter's right to inform the father of her baby of her pregnancy herself as soon as she was able to.

* * *

Kaidan's first thought was not to address the crew over the _Normandy_ 's public address system. It wasn't to go running up to every crew member and announce wildly that their ship's captain was alive, or go straight to the bridge and inform Joker in the hope that it would bring some comfort to the grieving pilot. He raced to the elevator behind Specialist Traynor at her station next to the Galaxy Map in the CIC, grinning from ear to ear, eagerly pressing the buttons on the elevator as the doors slowly closed behind him, silently wishing that EDI was still there to help speed things up a bit as he practically bounced on the balls of his feet in elation.

Kaidan stepped out the elevator after it rattled to the third floor in his state of euphoria to find Garrus, Tali, Liara and Doctor Chakwas mingling in front of the memorial wall Shepard had commissioned. It had been a daily ritual of Shepard's team since crash-landing to make a point of paying their respects at the wall once they had added the plaques dedicated to the last casualties in the war against the Reapers. They looked at Kaidan quizzically as he practically floated up to the wall, a noticeable new spring in his step, the biggest smile lighting up his tanned features. It had been quite some time since they had seen the Major in such a state during their last shore leave on the Citadel. Completely oblivious to the exclamations and gasps of the team members around him, Kaidan reached forward and removed the plaque embossed with "Commander A. Shepard" from the centre of the memorial.


	7. Chapter 7

 

The ocean waves crashed noisily amongst the sand dunes, broken sea shells and rock pools baking amongst the scorching sun rays on the beach's shore. The freezing cold water tickled Shepard's toes as she stood along the tide line whilst it loomed forward and receded periodically, her jet black hair blowing about her face in the cool wind, deeply inhaling the smell of the fresh ocean breeze. She closed her eyes and drank in the sound of the ocean, the familiar squawking of seagulls as they circled overhead, the feeling of peace and warmth that over came her as the familiar hand of a Drell assassin rested on her shoulder.

_Thank you for listening, Siha._

_I think my translator just glitched. What did you call me?_

_Siha. One day I'll tell you what it means._

In staying faithful to Kaidan, Shepard had never truly received closure from the intricate and complex relationship that she had developed with her fellow squad member during the mission against the Collectors. Hurting, head reeling from Kaidan's rejection on Horizon, she had found a deep connection she had been unable to explain with the assassin as he himself came to terms with his own demons, a piece of his heart and void left empty when he had buried his wife Irikah. It had the _Normandy_ crew members shaking their heads and scuttlebutt rumours abound as gossip spread throughout the ship that the Commander was seeking solace from her rejection by Kaidan in the newly recruited Drell assassin.

_But I met another Siha. Few are priviledged to meet even one._

_You still haven't told me what a Siha is._

_One of the warrior-angels of the goddess Arashu. Fierce in wrath. A tenacious protector._

No one every actually knew what Shepard and Thane spoke about in their debriefings after every mission, her visits to the life support control room lengthening with every trip. General consensus was that the Commander had developed feelings for the Drell but no one could actually know for sure, save for the Illusive Man as a shackled EDI periodically presented daily reports of the _Normandy_ crew's dialogue and actions for him to scrutinize over a glass of bourbon and endless cigarette.

_I confess... I've come to care for you. Perhaps I'm being foolish. We are very different._

Apt to believe that a woman would only actively engage the private company of another man for comfort and intimacy, the _Normandy_ crew had been on the right track about the seeking of comfort between the two hurting individuals, but could not have been further from the truth regarding physical intimacy. In Thane, Shepard had found an empathic ear willing to listen and a shoulder to cry on once Kaidan left her heart in pieces after their reunion on Horizon. Whilst Thane had come to care for Shepard romantically and admitted it freely to her, she realized that she had unknowingly been instigating feelings from his side and had promptly shut down his confession, her heart aching as she watched the hurt and disappointment flare in his dark eyes.

_No. I can't replace your wife. We are very different people, Thane. I wouldn't be able to replace Irikah._

_You wouldn't have. You can love more than one in a lifetime. I'll respect your wishes. I won't speak of it again. I hope it won't offend you if I carry you in my heart._

Thane had graciously received her rejection and continued to be her ear and shoulder to lean on, but Shepard's conscience had never come to terms with the fact that she had unconsciously broken the Drell's heart, after everything he had done for her. It would not have been fair on Thane to allow him to continue believing that she had developed feelings for him romantically. Whilst he had afterwards continued to support Shepard as she grappled with the knowledge that she still loved Kaidan and was not ready to move on from him, she could never quite shake the guilt that despite the unrequited love he continued to harbour for her, he was selflessly able to put them aside and provide her the comfort and companionship she so desperately needed in those months after Horizon.

Shepard's eyes welled with tears as she reached up to rest her hand atop of the Drell's on her shoulder, the palm of her hand tingling when it made contact with the soft, rubbery texture of his skin.

_I miss you every day, Thane._

The ocean continued to lap at her toes as the tide receded to and fro, her toes digging deep into the wet sand as she felt the waves subtly try to pull her closer and closer into the inviting blue expanse. She clenched her hand tighter as it continued to rest atop of Thane's on her shoulder, closing her eyes and savouring his musky scent as it mingled with the smells of the sand and water.

_Please, forgive me for what I did to you._

Shepard was unable to control the little cry that escaped from her lips.

_There is nothing to forgive. You could never, have never, done me any wrong. Feel no guilt over me, Siha. Even Arashu's strongest warrior would never have been able to stop himself from loving you. I cannot begrudge that I was unable to capture your heart._

_Irikah and I will be here waiting for you, when you are ready to join us with Kaidan, across the sea._

Struggling to hold back the onslaught of tears, Shepard felt the Drell move his hand from her shoulder and come around to face her, cupping her face between his hands. With one finger on each hand Thane gently brushed away the salty tears that began to stream down her cheeks before slowly leaning forward and placing a gentle kiss onto her forehead, leaving a pleasant tingling sensation where his skin brushed against hers.

Shepard took in a deep, shuddering breath and placed her hands over her cheeks as Thane's left her face, watching him through her tears as he turned and started to walk into the crashing waves. A smile of relief and contentment broke over the assassin's features as he raised his face in the direction of the sun, drinking in the rays, relishing in the feel of the cold and salty water lapping at his feet, the wind brushing against his face. His Irikah beckoned him further and further into the pristine blue depths. Left alone on the shore, Shepard rested her hands atop of her abdomen, savouring the tingliness as it left the skin of her face, her closure finally found.

_Guide him, Kalahira, and he will be a companion to you as he was to me._


	8. Chapter 8

The _Normandy's_ Enhanced Defence Intelligence had always been fascinated with human eyes. In her never-ending quest to gather data, she had taken to studying the crew members aboard her ship; their individual features, their personalities, their likes and dislikes, what made them tick. Their slightly different mating rituals... It fascinated her to no end that human eyes, despite being fundamentally the same in each person, could still be so unique and provide such a clear glimpse into a person's soul.

Despite the warm, bright and humorous eyes of her pilot and favourite crew member, it had been Commander Shepard's eyes that EDI had found by far the most appealing. Unlike the majority of the other crew members, Shepard's had a certain depth and spark present within her bright green irises, the small ring of a lighter shade of green surrounding each pupils like a blooming flower. Exactly the same as they had been before the Commander had perished above Alchera. More often than once, Shepard had allowed the inquisitive EDI and her buoyant mobile platform to stare fixedly into her eyes, asking questions about the rarity of her eye colour, the role of genetics in passing on traits to offspring, and voicing her own frustration that she was unable to replicate Shepard's exact colour and clarity whilst she and Joker "played" about with her gynoid infiltration disguises.

Shepard had fully expected to wake up one night to find EDI trying to pry open her eyes as she slept in order to satiate her ongoing fascination with her Commander's eyes. It appeared that EDI could not help herself any longer, and determined to get her human eye fix, had crept into the captain's quarters on night as Shepard and Kaidan slept.

Shepard, her head cushioned somewhat amongst the standard Alliance-issue excuses for pillows, in her stupor thought she could feel the curious Artificial Intelligence attempting to delicately pry open her eyelids, angling a bright pen torch to flash directly into her pupils. She tried to push EDI's hands away, but her arm strangely felt too heavy and weak to even lift up. Her eyes flew open, burning against the bright lights shining into her face that was uncharacteristic of the Captain's quarters. Shepard could feel her head reeling from the onslaught on her senses, her neck stiff, disobeying her every order to lift up or move. Starting to feel panicked, she tried to immediately sit up, but her washboard abdominal muscles refused to contract and she remained lying limply on the bed.

Feeling her heart race and palpitate in her chest as she never had before, her eyes rolling back in her head, Shepard gasped desperately and tried to make sense of her surroundings. Her chest felt as though it was still weighted down by heavy debris from the Crucible explosion and as her eyes widened in her panic she began to convulse involuntarily where she lay, her head shaking from side to side, her eyes straining to focus against the bright lights searing into her field of vision. Try as she might, she could not even manifest her biotic abilities, the implant at the back of her neck causing unbearable and piercing pain to surge into the base of her skull every time she attempted to tap into the element zero nodules embedded among her body tissues.

The Commander felt the weight of hands gently but firmly holding her down against her sheets, the bright lights beginning to slowly dim before her eyes, struggling to focus on what little she could amongst the onslaught of stimuli. Continuing to gasp and convulse with no control over her body, she felt a cool trickle just above her left collarbone towards her neck, the sensation spreading across her chest and down behind her sternum.

Barely audible voices could be heard muttering in the background as she felt her panic begin to ebb, her pounding heart rate slowly easing. She could faintly register the metallic taste in her mouth from where she had bit her tongue in her state of panic. Confused and scared, she felt herself slip into another state of unconsciousness.

Shepard had not felt like this since she had woken prematurely in the laboratory of the Lazarus Project.

* * *

"I am sure that was not the coming-to that you were expecting it to be," Doctor Michel muttered angrily to the team of intensive care doctors standing behind her at Shepard's bedside. The group of three men in white authoritative-looking coats tsk'ed and tut'ed behind her, whispering among themselves. Hands trembling in anger, she finished injecting the syringe of sedative into Commander Shepard's central line. The vital signs monitor at the Commander's bedside continued to squawk in protest to Shepard's racing heart rate and the increased blood pressure, caused by the surge of adrenaline throughout her body in her panic whilst regaining consciousness. Beside it, the monitor maintaining a steady vigil on the small life within her began to mirror the mother as the fight-and-flight response that had flooded her system began to reach the baby.

Stating that the head of Shepard's treating team was having an exhausting month would have been an understatement, to say the least. Pressured by her peers to bring Shepard out of her coma, Michel had prematurely done so against her better judgement. A _serious_ misjudgement, in her part. Performing cardiopulmonary resuscitation on the Saviour of the Galaxy after she had gone into cardiac arrest when the team initially titrated her off of the life support systems was not something she would ever forget. Feeling Shepard's ribs snap and break underneath her hands had haunted her for the past week in her dreams. The thought that she might not be able to pull Shepard through this battle and make a full recovery kept her pacing the doctor's bay in worry and dispair, ending with her burying her face into Kolyat's comforting chest when she felt she could bear the stress no longer.

_Typical human male doctors_! Michel thought to herself in frustration as the team filed out of the intensive care room now that the Commander was unconscious again and her vitals had begun to settle. _Always thinking they know better than me, just because their reproductive organs hang on the outside of their bodies_. Used to the admiration and respect that she received from alien male doctors back at Huerta Memorial Hospital on the Citadel after her promotion, Michel was becoming increasingly frustrated having every clinical decision she made for Shepard questioned. She placed her hand apologetically over Shepard's limp one as it rested by her side on the bed.

Twisting and reaching across as best as she could with no free hands to the nurse's terminal at the end of Shepard's bed, Michel kicked across the small wheeled-chair to her feet and sat down beside the Commander. The doctor sighed deeply as she glanced across at Shepard's vitals, the baby's monitor as it no longer flashed in warning that the fetus was under stress. She could not shake the guilt that was beginning to overwhelm her conscience, knowing that she had caused Shepard and the baby unnecessary stress by conforming to the urging of her medical team to attempt another try to gently bring her back out of her coma. Their rationale and reasoning racing through her mind, Michel racked her brain to think of anything she could have done differently. Why had she even followed them in the first place? _She_ was meant to be the head consultant of the medical team, _she_ was meant to be the one determining medical decisions for Shepard in consultation with her closest next-of-kin, her mother. Shepard deserved a better, stronger and more determined doctor to advocate for her and her baby while she was unable to herself.

_They don't care about the Commander or the child's well being_ , Michel thought bitterly to herself. _They just want to be able to boast to the Galaxy that they were the ones who saved and brought back Commander Shepard and her miracle child from the brink of death._

In humanity's brief medical history (only when compared to the other council races), women had gone for many months on life support machines without any detrimental affects to their fetus, Dr Michel remembered arguing. Her team had argued back that they had no previous experience or evidence to support that Shepard's cybernetics would be able to hold out and allow her body maintain a healthy pregnancy. So heavily dependent on the influx of hormones from the endocrine glands within her body in response to external stimuli, Shepard's cybernetics were seriously at risk of ceasing to function entirely. The use of pharmacological means to keep Shepard in a coma meant that her endocrine system was also being suppressed somewhat, in turn affecting the cybernetic implants responsible for keeping her heart beating, the neural transmitters within her brain firing, the cells of her body regenerating and multiplying. Suppressing Shepard in a medically-induced state of unconsciousness was going to seriously jeopardize her body's ability to facilitate the ongoing changes needed to accommodate a growing life within her. Bringing Shepard out of her coma after almost a month, they had argued, was the only option to avoid total cybernetic implant failure.

_I need another team_ , the doctor thought to herself wearily, guilt washing over her as she thought of the strain she was putting Shepard and her child through. _How can I get her through this when I am working with a team of egomaniacal know-it-alls?_

Doctor Michel absentmindedly studied Shepard's features, the sheen of new scar tissue peppered among the pale skin and smattering of freckles across her face. Fuzzy black hair had finally begun to grow again across her scalp, an outline of her previously non-existent eyebrows no longer giving her a permanently dazed and surprised expression. _I promise I will get you through this safely, Commander_ , Michel thought to herself. She gently squeezed Shepard's hands, pink and soft where the new layer of epithelial tissue had begun to form over her burns. _I will get you both through this._

Leaning back against the nurse's chair, Michel tapped the small comm-piece in her ear with a free finger. Small static buzzed in her ear as a voice piped up through the small speaker. "Yes, Doctor Michel?"

"Please put a priority message through to Admiral Hackett and the fifth fleet. Regarding Commander Shepard's recovery. Tell them that we must locate and bring Miranda Lawson to Earth, immediately."


	9. Chapter 9

In keeping with Shepard's style of leadership, Kaidan preferred to do a round about the _Normandy_ before retiring for the night, checking on the crew's progress, providing acknowledgment of their efforts, encouragement, a reassuring smile and a willing ear to listen to those who needed it. He felt it was important to the crew to maintain as much of a degree of normalcy as possible, and mirroring what made Commander Shepard such a successful leader and friend seemed to be just the thing that the crew responded positively to.

One month into their slow trudge home across the galaxy, and they were making excellent progress. The _Normandy_ , despite the extensive damage she had received during the final battle and face-plant into a planet hundreds of light-years away from Earth, ever faithful in her loyalty and service had not yet failed them. Like a protective mother lioness fiercely shielding her cubs, the _Normandy SR2_ continued to harbour and protect Shepard's crew safely in their final mission to make it back home.

Fuel consumption was currently on track according to their estimates, with more than enough in reserves if they needed to deviate from their course for re-supplying. Hull integrity was holding against the patchy repairs to the ship's ablative armor. Engaging stealth was being a little too ambitious at the moment, but not necessary now that they were no longer in any immediate danger. The Tantalus Drive Core down in the engineering level, responsible for generating the mass effect field around the ship's hull to facilitate faster-than-light travel had given Tali, Adams, Kenneth and Gabi a little more grief than initially anticipated. Usually able to sink the heat efficiently generated during travel, the engineering crew had needed to become rather creative in their repairs by stripping one of Cortez's beloved shuttles for parts, much to the Lieutenant's dismay. Without the advice and guidance of EDI it had proved a struggle requiring the engineers to test every theory of physics and quantum mechanics that they knew, but Tali reassured Kaidan that it was nothing that they had not been equipped to handle.

The CIC was almost empty, with the skeleton night crew at their stations, the beeping of consoles and systems barely noticed to the ears that were so used to them. Kaidan stood at the forefront of the CIC leaning on the railing in front of the Galaxy map, it's light basking his face like a warm glow. The Sol System beckoned before him mockingly, pulsing and blinking on the screen, teasing him with the promise of returning back to Earth, to Shepard. More often than not Kaidan would find himself staring trans-fixedly into the map, reflecting on each system as they traveled through, dwelling on past memories of missions, trying not to focus on the remains of colonies floating in the void outside of the ship's windows that were left in the wake of the Reapers during their harvest. Visions of Shepard standing before the Galaxy Map would flood his senses like her warm embrace as he envisioned the lines of her face framed by the dancing lights projected; creating the halo of a Messiah around her head as she so often frowned, raged, smiled, hung her head in despair. He had memorized every curve, every freckle, every line, every delicate eyelash like the lyrics of his favourite song. Kaidan kept his memories of Shepard fresh every night in his mind as he dreamed of holding the Commander in his arms, devouring her with his lips, feeling her tremble with passion and excitement underneath his touch.

Rubbing his bloodshot eyes with one hand, Kaidan pushed himself off of the Galaxy Map railing, preparing for a final round of the crew before retiring for the night. Stepping down from the map he made his way around the array of consoles centered in the middle of the CIC and, nodding to the few crew members who saluted him respectfully in their stations as he passed, made his way up to the bridge of the _Normandy._

Approaching the bridge, Kaidan could not miss the sharp scent of beer lingering in the air, the clinking of glasses bottles un-muffled through the closed doors. Stepping up to them as they opened, he was greeted with the sight of the ship's pilot drowning himself in a sea of brewer's yeast and fermented sugar. Joker had seated himself in EDI's previous place at the right of the pilot's chair, empty beer bottles scattered around the cockpit haphazardly, a crumpled duvet and pillow left carelessly on the floor in a small corner. Reminding Kaidan with a sore pang of the slow and grueling months following Shepard's death above Alchera, he cleared his throat loudly.

Joker did not bother to look up as Kaidan entered.

"Please tell me you did are not responsible for depleting Doctor Chakwas's private stash of beer, Joker," Kaidan joked weakly as he folded his arms, maintaining a respectful distance from the pilot in his state. Despite the overwhelming surge of annoyance that Joker had compromised safety and blatantly disregarded regulations by drinking whilst on duty, he could not bring himself to use a harsh tone on a man wrestling with grief.

Memories of Kaidan's own grieving state after Shepard's death almost four years ago continued to stab painfully at his heart. The Major pushed them away to the back of his mind.

"I see you've been sleeping in here when you're off duty again," Kaidan gestured to the pillow and duvet. Joker ignored his comment, his head hanging pitifully and shoulders sagging, his eyes unfocused on the piloting console before him. A half-empty bottle of beer hung limply from his fingertips.

"Can you hear me, Joker?"

Silence.

Kaidan unfolded his arms and stepped forward closer to EDI's old chair, leaning on it with the side of his body and resting his right arm across the headrest.

"Please tell me you're at least conscious, Joker."

Finally instigating a response out of Joker, Kaidan did not flinch as the pilot flashed a dirty look in the direction of the Major. "I am, unfortunately," Joker muttered sarcastically in reply. He raised the glass of beer he was holding. "I'm working on that, though."

Kaidan shook his head, trying his best not to seem disappointed in Joker's behaviour. "I can empathize with what you're going through at the moment Joker, but I have to impress the seriousness of what you are doing by getting intoxicated while you are on duty."

More silence.

"Joker, I am serious. You've put us all in danger by compromising your concentration."

"Chill out biotic balls, I've had the auto pilot on this whole time," Joker's head snapped up as he swiveled EDI's chair to turn around to face the Major. Kaidan was jerked forward, Joker watching as the Major stumbled before him with a glint of satisfaction in his intoxicated eyes. "Not as perfect as my good ol' dead sex bot used to be able to fly, but we've managed to avoid some pretty epic debris fields. Did you hear us almost go through them? _Chkk chkk chugga chugga_." Joker waved his arms above his head in what Kaidan could only assume was in imitation of turbulence as the _Normandy_ 's kinetic barriers struggled to deflect pieces of debris from making contact with the fragile hull. Beer sloshed in every direction.

 _Perhaps I have to talk to Joker like Shepard would have_ , Kaidan thought to himself. _Kick his arse into gear_. "Drinking yourself into a state of oblivion isn't going to make things any easier for you, Joker," Kaidan replied gently. He made to move forward and grab a beer bottle to move out of the way in order to step closer to the pilot, intent on bundling him up and escorting him to the softer bed awaiting him in the crew's quarters.

"Be careful of that man, I'm so sloshed I don't even remember if that's beer or piss. Misplaced my piss bottle a while ago, ya know..."

Kaidan promptly placed the beer bottle back down like a hot coal. "Come on, Joker," he ordered gently, "time to go to bed. A _proper bed_ ," he added, as Joker pointed in the direction of his pillow and duvet. "Commanding Officer's orders. No buts. I'll knock you out and drag you there if I have to."

It was difficult watching the pilot, so steadfast and determined in character as he piloted the helm of the Galaxy's last hope, breaking down to pieces before his eyes. The Major knew better than anybody how the death of someone you loved could change you into a shell of who you used to be, he thought to himself sadly. Kaidan reached forward to pull him up gently by his arms. Joker, eye's beginning to droop in his beer-induced stupor, did not even struggle, leaning heavily on the Major as his legs wobbled like jelly beneath him. Kaidan took care to bear the grunt of Joker's weight beneath him, ever-conscious of his Vrolick's syndrome, practically half-dragging and half-carrying the pilot out of the _Normandy_ 's bridge and through the CIC to the elevator.

Forcing Joker out of the bridge seemed to be just what the pilot required to open the floodgates, and he crumpled amongst Kaidan's supportive arms as he started to sob uncontrollably.

* * *

Kaidan smiled weakly at Doctor Chakwas and Engineer Adams as he stumbled through the door of the crew's quarters with Joker in tow, slowly making his way past them to Joker's bunk. The doctor and the engineer sat at a table towards the back of the quarters, immersed in a silent game of old-fashioned chess before retiring for the night. The holo-timer next to their chess set boasted that fifteen minutes had passed since the last player had made a move. Doctor Chakwas tutted under her breath as Adams tentatively moved forward a piece, only to have her swiftly remove it from the board with a knock from her dominating queen.

"Checkmate," Chakwas said with a flourish, her British accent giving her the air of one raised as royalty. "Come _on_ Greg, you promised me a challenge this time. Don't make me go back to playing with Samantha."

Precariously balancing Joker off of one arm, Kaidan managed to turn down the crisp sheets in Joker's bed, barely slept in since before the final battle on Earth. He gently lowered Joker onto the bed, bending back down to swing the pilot's limp legs up, relieving him of his heavy combat boots. In an almost paternal-like manner, he straightened the bedsheets around Joker's limp form, tucking him in like a father lovingly tucking in a child.

"I just want her back, Kaidan," Joker said in a pitiful voice, his head nestled against the soft linen.

"It will get easier in time, Joker. You hate me at the moment for saying it, but I can promise you that."

* * *

As the automatic doors of the crew's quarters closed and Joker's muffled snores receded behind him, Kaidan heard loud chatter coming from the kitchen in the mess hall, as well as the smells of cooking and clinking cutlery. Turning around the corner to investigate, he was greeted by the site of Traynor and Tali perched on the kitchen bench next to James as he poked and flipped at the contents of the sizzling pan before him. Garrus stood beside Tali, his arm snaked around her waist. Cortez sat in the corner as he leaned against the kitchenette's fridge, balancing a plate of eggs precariously in his lap.

"What do you think is the first thing you're going to do when you get home?" Garrus asked the small group, intertwining his talons with Tali's fingers as she sucked out the contents of a tube of dextro paste through her emergency induction port.

"Oh amigo, where do I start." James sighed contentedly, flipping the contents of his frying pan as smoke wafted into his field of vision. "First thing's first, I'm going to spend a well-deserved furlough with a handful of blue Asari be-yew-tays." James chuckled as the group groaned together in unison. "Number one thing to do on my bucket list. I'm going to show those ladies some proper human latino lovin'." James nodded to Kaidan as he came to lean on the cabinet to James' left side, keeping clear of the smoke emitting from the pan as it smoked among James enthusiastic hands. "Care for some of my abuela's huevos rancheros, Major?"

"Think I'll pass James, thanks," Kaidan raised an eyebrow as the omelette James flipped in the pan looked black and burnt on the underside. The Lieutenant shrugged.

"More for me, amigo."

"I'm going to see if I can find any information about my family's whereabouts. Get my hands on some sucro-capsinol. Get myself a new toothbrush," Traynor smiled to herself, swinging her legs to and fro. "My Cision Pro-Mark Two just isn't cutting it for me like the Four used to."

"I'm going to see if I can locate an undamaged Trident. Maybe steal it. Maybe take it for a joy ride. Maybe not bring it back," Cortez smiled mischieviously between mouthfuls of eggs.

"What about you and Tali?" Kaidan asked Garrus, noting the closeness of the Turian and the Quarian but electing not to say anything to draw attention to it. It was no secret now that the two were an item. Given everything that they had been through and his own fraternization with Commander Shepard, Kaidan had elected to turn a blind eye to any budding relationships he was beginning to take note of aboard the ship. Saving the Galaxy warranted a new lease on life, and if that meant a new relationship so be it.

"First thing I'm going to do is set fire to any dextro paste rations we have left over!" Tali spat out in a disgusted voice, pulling the empty tube of paste out of the port in her helmet and flicking it to the trash receptacle to the side of the kitchenette counter. "I am so sick of this stuff. I cannot wait until I am able to sink my helmet into some decent, solid food!"

"Won't that be difficult, given that Earth doesn't naturally grow any dextro-amino based foods?" Traynor asked Tali quizzically.

"Ah, _Bosh'tet_."

Garrus clicked his mandibles at Tali in what everyone assumed was a warm way of smiling. "I'm going to organise a proper memorial service for EDI," he stated softly. The smile's on the groups' faces faltered a little as they remembered the beloved team member that they had lost. "Give her the respect and send-off she deserves back on Earth. Pop a few heat sinks in her honour." He nodded in the direction of the AI core behind the _Normandy'_ s med bay, where EDI's mobile body had been placed respectfully in the alcove towards the back. There was a momentary lull in the conversation as their thoughts dwelled on the AI who had sacrificed and given so much for her crew.

"What about you, Kaidan?" Tali asked, producing another tube of dextro-paste out of her enviro-suit and inserting the small nozzle into the port in her helmet.

"Three guesses as to what he's going to do," James chuckled. "Or should I say, _who_ he's going to do. Wink, wink."

"Anddd I'm out of here," Kaidan replied as he pushed himself off of the cabinet, waving to the group and heading in the direction of Liara's quarters.

"Don't bother going to go say goodnight to Gabi and Ken, Kaidan," Tali called after him. "I got the impression that they were gunning for a little privacy downstairs. Near the bottom..."

* * *

Liara was sprawled across her double bed, her face turned upwards towards the ceiling. Javik was sitting before her private terminal in the corner of her quarters, dictating in a drawling voice to Glyph as the drone transcribed for the Prothean. Both of them barely moved when the door's to Liara's quarters opened and Kaidan stepped in to check in with them on his final stop.

It appeared that Javik and Liara were working together on the book they had planned to write together regarding Prothean history. Judging by Javik outlining the best ways to cook Salarian liver, they were currently focusing on the chapter of Prothean cuisine.

" _Salarian liver was considered a delicacy in the Empire_ ," Javik dictated to Glyph in his monotonous voice. " _It is best served at room temperature_. _Even better when the Salarian is still alive. The fear adds spice_."

"Perhaps leave that line out, Javik," Liara noted from her bed. "We're aiming to reach a large audience with this book. It would not do to promote cannibalism among the Salarians." She sat up as the Major walked closer into the centre of her room, Javik nodding at Kaidan from his seat beside the drone. "Retiring for the night, Kaidan?"

"Bang on," Kaidan replied, giving Liara the thumbs up. "Just wanted to touch base with you both. Make sure everything is okay. The usual."

"We are as well as we usually are," Liara replied, Javik nodding in agreement. "Just working a little more on our book together. It's proving a little more... challenging that I had initially anticipated, but being able to record Javik and the Prothean's history into a detailed Codex is giving us something productive to do. If it were not for this, I would go crazy without my news feeds." Liara nodded in the direction of her Shadow Broker terminal, silent since the destruction of the relays and comm buoys, a small layer of dust beginning to gather on the surfaces. She smiled at Javik encouragingly. "Javik is certainly keeping my mind off of my troubles, that is for sure."

"I am pleased to hear that, Liara," the Major nodded in satisfaction, turning around and heading back to the door of Liara's room. "I will leave you both to it, then. As always, if you need anything, you know where to find me."

"Will do, Kaidan. I hope that you get a good night's rest tonight. Goddess knows you deserve it," Liara replied, waving him out of her quarters.

"May I retire here tonight with you, Liara?" Kaidan heard the Prothean ask the Asari as the doors closed behind him. He didn't hear Liara's reply, but he would have bet his biotic balls that the Shadow Broker did not refuse.

* * *

Stepping out of the elevator into the Captain's quarters, Kaidan took a moment to deeply inhale the smell of Shepard as it lingered among the air particles, igniting his senses. Shedding his fatigues into a pile on the floor, he climbed onto the bed he had shared with the Commander, lying flat on his back to look out at the skylight. Kaidan sighed deeply as he watched the stars pass slowly by, a sheen of gases that almost seemed akin to fog leaving a luster amongst the skylight's surface, causing speckles of multi-coloured lights to filter down onto the king-sized bed. _Three more months_ , he thought to himself as he allowed images and memories of Shepard begin to claim and wash over him, his body relaxing, ready to savour the sweet thoughts of its missing lover. _Three more months in this Purgatory, and I will finally have her with me again._


	10. Chapter 10

A lone fighter jet slowly approached the remnants of Jump Zero like a determined snail making its way across a garden bed, the Alliance Gargarin Station positioned on the outskirts of the Sol System growing ever bigger in its line of sight as it inched closer and closer. The jet's propellers sputtered and sneezed, unable to maintain a straight course through the empty space. It was a relief to the jet's occupants to find the lights of the Jump Zero Station blinking and beckoning them towards it, functional and reasonably intact given that it was the first point of human defense systems that the Reapers would have encountered as they tore through the relay into Sol.

Inside the fighter jet sat two individuals, almost identical in features right down to a freckle, looking somewhat worn out and uncomfortably cramped within the confined space of the jet's interior. The slightly older-looking woman at the helm of the fighter cracked her knuckles, much to the annoyance of her sister before initiating an open line of communication from the cockpit to the station.

"This is Operative Miranda Lawson with her sister, Oriana Lawson. We are in need of immediate assistance; we have been traveling for four Earth days and require a place to dock safely. Requesting permission to land."

There was a lull in the comm as her audio message was transmitted to the station. She tapped her fingers impatiently against the fighter's console, waiting as the Station confirmed her identify via voice recognition for security given that she was not a member of the Alliance.

"Identity confirmed. Permission granted, Miss Lawson," a voice finally replied on the other channel. "There is a smaller undamaged auxiliary cargo port to the east of the Station that will be appropriate for you to safely land your craft. Follow the yellow and green lights to your right, and be careful of any floating debris."

Behind her, Oriana sighed in relief, eager to disembark from the fighter jet and stretch her legs. "Understood," Miranda replied, pulling backward on the fighter's steering as she turned the jet to change trajectory in the direction instructed by the Station's operator.

There was another buzz as the disembodied voice on the other end re-opened the comm channel. "I must say Miss Lawson, your timing is impeccable. We have been searching for you for some time now."

"I know," Miranda replied simply.

* * *

"You are certainly not the easiest person to locate, Miss Lawson," Hackett stated to the former Cerberus Operative as she matched his fast stride beside him. "I was beginning to think that we were never going find you."

"I assure you, I came as quickly as I could," Miranda replied in a formal and respectful tone. "Traveling without access to functional relays and with limited resources proved a challenge. If it were not for my resourceful sister, we'd still be stranded outside of the local cluster."

"I am pleased to hear that you have not lost your skills after focusing so long on striking Cerberus targets for the Alliance," Hackett continued on, leading Miranda through the uniform white and bleached hallways of the Alliance Hospital towards their destination. Heads turned as doctors, nurses and patients caught eye of the woman beside the Admiral, unsure of who she was but impressed by the perfect definition of her body and shaped features. As they approached and stepped into the decontamination program located just outside of the hospital's intensive care unit, their attire appeared to sizzle and sputter as the beam washed over them, removing their bodies of harmful bacteria and dirt."Your knowledge and skills are going to paramount if we're going to bring Commander Shepard out of her coma and onto the road to a full recovery, Miss Lawson."

Once the decontamination program beeped to signal that it had finished, Hackett and Miranda stepped out and continued into the intensive care unit, the smell of antiseptic alcohol thick in the air and burning at Miranda's nostrils. The beeping of machines and sounds of medical professionals going about their work brought back a sense of nostalgia for the former Cerberus Officer. It had been quite some time since Miranda had needed to utilize the extensive knowledge she harbored regarding human anatomy and physiology. She secretly hoped that her skills had not gone rusty since the completion of the Lazarus project.

Hackett led Miranda to a secluded and private room, its windows' blackened out for privacy against prying eyes, a pair of Alliance marines stationed dutifully outside of the door. Returning the respectful salutes of the soldiers as they snapped to attention, Hackett stepped back politely and beckoned to Miranda to enter the room before him, motioning to the guards that they were not to be disturbed.

Miranda eyes unconsciously darted around the room, scanning her immediate surroundings, taking in the sight of the limp form of a woman atop of a bed in the centre among a mass of older-style medical equipment, a familiar looking Drell sitting at her bedside quietly murmuring at his charge as he read to her from a book he held in his hands. The machines hooked to the woman beeped ominously, repeatedly and rhythmically, indicating that the woman still determinedly clung to life.

It took Miranda a moment to realize that the second monitor that was beeping in time to a rapid heartbeat belonged to another being not initially visible in the room; a small bump unnoticed under Shepard's hospital gown. Realizing immediately who the monitor belonged to, Miranda's hands flew to her chest, her heart rising in her throat.

"Oh, Shepard," she gasped in dismay.

* * *

"How much experience do you actually have with cybernetics, Doctor Michel?" Miranda asked the Earth-trained doctor as they both hovered around Shepard' bedside, her eyebrows furrowing together as she waved the flickering projection of her omni-tool across Shepard's still form. Kolyat had left the Commander's bedside, escorted out by the Admiral so that the two women could knuckle down to work. He had exchanged a friendly smile and nod to Miranda before placing a quick kiss on Doctor Michel's cheek, the former remembering him from back when Commander Shepard had assisted his father in recovering him in the Citadel.

Doctor Michel, tearing her eyes away from the impressive bosom that almost seemed to take up much of her line of sight, looked up to see Miranda waiting for her answer opposite of Shepard's bed. "I will confess not much, Miss Lawson," Michel admitted a little ruefully. "Save for the standard bone weave enhancements, biotic implants, the less complex cybernetics used in mainstream medicine... Commander Shepard's implants are unlike anything I have ever encountered before. To be honest I didn't even know that there were enhancements like hers even available."

"Well, I must praise you for how far you've brought her," Miranda replied in what Michel assumed was some form of positive acknowledgement. "You've certainly managed her injuries better than any other doctor would have done given the circumstances. I must request that your team of doctors are not involved any longer..." In response to this, Doctor Michel nodded more enthusiastically than she should have. "It is a shame that her leg couldn't be saved. We can approach that issue when it comes to it though... I should be able to re-grow one for her if I resources are available. Her liver function is not as good as I would have hoped, given how long it has been since she was injured... Might I ask what happened to her spleen? It's of utmost importance that she have one, in her condition."

"Damaged beyond repair," Michel replied sadly. "She received extensive injuries and shrapnel to the upper left quadrant of her abdomen. It appeared that a piece a debris practically speared her. We have been lucky in that Rear Admiral Shepard has been able to provide a sample of healthy spleen tissue for us to culture another one in the lab for the Commander. It should be ready for transplant back into Shepard in the next two weeks."

Miranda nodded satisfactorily in response.

There was a pregnant pause as the doctor watched the former Cerberus operative quickly scrutinize the medical notes from Shepard's time in the hospital, her tongue between her two front teeth, her eyes narrowing as she compared Doctor Michel's notes to the diagnostics her omni-tool displayed.

"I just don't understand what we are doing wrong every time that we try to bring her out of her coma, Miss Lawson," Michel admitted in the voice of one admitting that she was close to defeat. "To say I am stumped is an understatement."

Miranda's eyes continued to glance from her omni-tool readings to the datapad that Michel had provided to her, her eyes expertly skimming through the results of recent blood tests, the images from the Commander's latest magnetic resonance imaging.

"It's because her cybernetics are practically fried, Doctor Michel."

"Practically fri... say what?"

Miranda continued to skim the readings and diagnostics her omni-tool spat out. She took a step backward and sat down heavily on the visitor's armchair, her eyes widening, her mind processing the abundance of information. "How... how is it that she is still even alive...?" she muttered to herself, shaking her head at Shepard, a tone of admiration in her voice.

"I'm afraid you have me completely confused, Miss Lawson."

"The cybernetics maintaining a normal firing rate of neural impulses in Shepard's brain are effectively redundant at the moment, Doctor," Miranda explained. "It makes sense that her body is overreacting every time you try to bring her back to consciousness. The neurons are over-firing and her sympathetic nervous system is over-compensating to her fight-and-flight response. Thus her body is getting flooded with a barrage of hormones that are stimulating her to levels of stress that can be very dangerous. The cybernetics that we grafted into her body were meant to assist with this. I cannot figure out if they are fried due to what happened to her aboard the Citadel, or if something else has happened. Remember how most of our technology stopped functioning once the Reapers were destroyed and the Mass Relays in that chain reaction?" Miranda paused, nodding in Shepard's direction. "Wouldn't surprise me if it's what has also fried the Commander's implants. It is very unlikely that the cybernetics have become redundant due to lack of use in her comatose state," she added ruefully, noting the reasons that Doctor Michel's team had insisted were rationale enough to attempt bring her out of her coma. "I made very sure that Shepard's cybernetics were well equipped for the long haul."

A feeling of failure and disappointment overwhelmed Doctor Michel as it dawned on her that despite her years of experience and training, she had completely misread the diagnostics she had performed herself on Shepard's cybernetics and approached her recovery in the completely wrong direction. She hung her head in shame, gutted with the feeling that she had failed the Commander.

Miranda continued, despite noting the change in the doctor's affect. "I'll be frank. Shepard shouldn't have survived, Doctor Michel. The fact that she still with us, is still _pregnant_ given the trauma and stress she has gone through, is an absolute miracle." She paused, her face softening as she looked fondly at Shepard's face. "Oh Shepard, there has never been anyone ever like you."

Disregarding Michel's data pad on Shepard's bedside table, Miranda smiled across Shepard's bed at Michel. "Well! Like most of the technology destroyed in the blast, her cybernetics can be fixed," she said confidently. "Time to get to work!"

Hope flooded Michel's chest. She silently thanked her stars that she had the sense to order on locating Miranda Lawson when she did.

"Leave it to me, Doctor" Miranda bounced up from her chair, turning off her omni-tool with a flick of her arm. "You get me whatever I need, and I'll bring Shepard and baby Shenko out of this coma safely."


	11. Chapter 11

"… And then Grunt managed to persuade her to let him bring back a big chunk of Thresher Maw after his initiation on Tuchanka," Karin Chakwas laughed to Hannah Shepard across the QEC, her silhouette flickering every time her chest heaved jovially. "I will never forget her expression, Hannah, so similar to her father's! She looked just like he used to whenever she wanted to do something he knew he shouldn't let her but couldn't bring himself to say no… She even helped Grunt create a spit roast in the cargo bay to cook it because he wanted it so badly. You could not even begin to imagine the stench! Shepard went positively _green_ when Grunt puppy-eyed her into trying a mouthful. Was stuck in the _Normandy_ medbay for hours, throwing up…" Chakwas doubled over and pretended to heave and splutter in what one could only guess was in imitation of the Commander emptying out her insides onto the floor.

The old friends laughed together in unison, Chakwas still doubled up towards the floor and Hannah clutching at a railing on her end of the QEC as tears welled in their eyes and they gasped for air, sharing stories about Shepard.

"Oh, the things Shepard would do for her crew," Chakwas chuckled somewhat sadly as she straightened herself upright. "You raised a daughter who is one in a billion, Hannah."

Hannah quickly wiped away the tears of laughter in her eyes with her sleeve. "I'm not sure my parenting skills or lack thereof had anything to actually do with how Aurora turned out, Karin," she admitted to the doctor with a smile. "The more and more I think about it, the more and more I think her birth was pre-ordained."

"Shame the powers above couldn't have had a bit more say in your labour tolerance during her birth, hey?" Karin chuckled, reminiscing at the memories of a laboring Hannah screaming at John Shepard that she never wanted to see him naked again amongst the onslaught of contractions.

"I have elected to completely forget that whole show," Hannah mused fondly.

There was a pause as they both collected their breath, feeling somewhat more content after the good laugh. "Steven would not be impressed if he knew that I'm using my ship's QEC to make a person call," Hannah sighed. "I've really missed you, Karin."

"And I you," Karin mused fondly. "True friendships will always withstand the test of time. And look at what has happened since our younger days! Who would have thought that day when I helped you deliver that beautiful little baby girl that she would go on to save the entire galaxy? I always suspected she was meant to do something special."

"She certainly was," Hannah replied softly.

"That reminds me. How did Shepard's transplant go, Hannah?" Chakwas asked, remembering that the Commander had been booked in for surgery to replace her spleen.

"Surprisingly well," Hannah replied. "Miss Lawson has been an absolute godsend. She was able to modify the cells in the spleen that Doctor Michel cultured from my sample with some sort of gene therapy so that Aurora won't need to take anti-rejection drugs. Much safer for her and the baby. She says that it was a new treatment that Cerberus had been working on prior to their demise. The new spleen will essentially be recognized by her body as her own. It absolutely baffles me, but happy to take it!"

"I would expect no less from Miranda," Chakwas nodded fondly. "Chloe was very wise to seek her out."

"Miss Lawson assures me that she will be able to bring Aurora safely out of her coma in the next day or two," Hannah added. "I am so hopeful that she will be able to do it, Karin. I want to have some good news for the _Normandy_ 's crew. How is Major Alenko handling with the updates about her?"

"Kaidan has not quite fully grasped the seriousness of what Shepard is going through," Chakwas replied sadly. "He's so adamant that she's going to pull through. The Major still thinks that she's just in a coma so that her body can have time to heal, ready to be awakened when the time is right. He has no idea the struggle that Doctor Michel is having in bringing her back to consciousness safely."

"I haven't even told him about how they had to amputate her leg," Hannah sighed. "I'm feeling so guilty about deliberately leaving him in the dark like this."

"You have to. We can't afford to let him have this worry hanging over him about her, not when he still has to get us home," Chakwas assured her. "I am not one for withholding information usually, but in this care you are doing the right thing. If he fully comprehended that Shepard is still in danger it would turn him into a mess."

There was a pause as the Rear Admiral nodded, the doctor's reassurance not quite dissipating the feeling of guilt she held over keeping her daughter's lover deliberately in the dark.

"You still haven't told Kaidan about Shepard's pregnancy?"

Hannah bit her lip. "As much as I want to, it's… not my place. It's for Aurora to tell him, when she is well on the way to recovery and ready to. She obviously kept it from him for a reason, given she was in the beginning of the second trimester when she was rescued... And call me a pessimist but I can't help but think. What if Miss Lawson can't bring her out of this coma safely, and we lose her? I never knew the Major as well as I probably should have, but I can only imagine how it would break him to know that he lost not only Shepard, but their child as well."

Chakwas nodded, remembering how stressed and visibly shaken Shepard had been by the news of her pregnancy, and how adamant she was that Kaidan was not to know of the little life they had made together that growing inside her womb. So close to the Alliance launching an assault of the Illusive Man's base, Shepard was determined that nothing should sway them from their mission, ever focused on her objective.

"I guess we'll know before the week is out though, Karin."

"Sooner than that, with Miranda Lawson at the helm, I can assure you," Chakwas replied. "When you get back there, you tell that tough girl of yours to get her backside out of that coma and hospital bed," she ordered the Rear Admiral. "She has not come this far for nothing! And I don't want to hear that some other doctor is going to deliver her baby either. Just because she's not on the _Normandy_ anymore and we are hundreds of light years away, doesn't mean I'm not still her doctor!"

"Ai ai, Doctor Chakwas," Hannah mockingly stood as straight as a rod and saluted the doctor, both of them mutually bursting into a fit of giggles again, their friendship unchanged by the years that had passed since they had last spoken.

* * *

As the Alliance shuttle puttered through the Earth's atmosphere, intent on escorting Rear Admiral Shepard to a safe landing pad deep within the ruins of the Alliance Headquarter's in Vancouver, Hannah's eyes fluttered to and fro as she took in the scenes of the outside world displayed before her through the shuttle's extrinsic cameras. Despite a number of trips to and from her daughter's bedside from the _Orizaba_ stationed above Vancouver just on the outskirts of the Earth's atmosphere, the sight of her home world in such a state always brought a deep ache to her heart.

Endless stretches of rubble, camps of refugees, pockets of areas where clearing and rebuilding had commenced stretched for as far as the eye could see. The Alliance's first priority was to commission makeshift housing for the endless lines of homeless refugees, as well as distributing medical aid and addressing shortages in food and clean water. Having slowly ensured that the survivors were as well cared for as could be under the circumstances, it was time to turn their attention to tackling the daunting task of cleaning up the remains of the ancient machines in the wake of their harvest.

Almost two months since Commander Shepard had activated the Crucible, Earth's remaining population were making a dent, albeit a small one, in restoring their world back to pre-war state. The remnants of husks, marauders, banshees, debris from Reaper technology and even destroyers and capital ships from the final battle continued to litter the Earth's surface in abundance. The full extent of the invasion and harvest had slowly become evident as communications between the surviving countries and governments were slowly established; no part of the world had remained untouched, the Reapers thorough in their extermination. Despite the Crucible's energy rendering the Reapers completely redundant, the Alliance and what remained of other races that had banded together to deliver the Crucible to Earth were not taking any chances with indoctrination. Whilst a number of intact Asari, Quarian, Turian and Salarian ships that remained relatively undamaged in the final battle began the slow trudge back to their systems, a small number elected to remain behind in the system where the Citadel stayed, eager to rebuild the Station as the heart of the galactic community. Slowly and surely, utilizing almost every available ship that was space-worthy, remains of the Reapers from Earth, the empty space surrounding it and aboard the Citadel were slowly dragged towards the Sol System's sun and propelled into the spherical ball of hot plasma. The chemical composition of the Sol System's star and its hydrogen fusion core were the only known way of ensuring that whatever was left of the partly synthetic and organic machines were completely disintegrated. It was an overwhelming task that would take a significant amount of time, but one that the survivors were determined to complete thoroughly and efficiently.

The remains of the Citadel remained floating in the void outside of the Earth's atmosphere, the beam to London that the Reaper's had established to ferry live humans to the station for processing into a human Reaper still active. Despite its extensive damage, the space station was surprisingly still able to maintain life support systems in what remained of the Citadel's arms, allowing for the races that had survived the Reapers on the station to begin the long process of restoring the Citadel to its former glory. Stranded in a system that was not their own due to the destroyed relays, the non-human races that were left behind were determined to make the most of their situation and bide their time in their adopted system until the task of restoring the Mass Relays could finally begin.

As Hannah Shepard's shuttle flew across a field hospital that had been erected among the ruins of a Vancouver park, she watched trans fixedly at the movement and bustle of the humans within, the rows and rows of tents housing injured survivors receiving what little medical attention that the Alliance would supply. It had become evident to the doctors manning the field hospitals in the few months since the end of the war that the human race was beginning to undergo dramatic changes. As the planet had been bombarded with the element zero energy cores of destroyed Reapers, an influx in the numbers of babies being born with biotic abilities had begun to steadily rise. The few scientists that remained where calling it "the next phase of human evolution," where every child exposed to the element zero cores scattered around the globe were born with the element zero nodules interlaced throughout their bodies, capable of naturally manifesting mass-effect fields. Such effects had not just been limited to the human race, however; what remained of the animal kingdom were beginning to exhibit biotic abilities in their young born shortly after the war had ended also. Biotics, once considered mostly rare in the vast population of Earth pre-war, were beginning to become more and more common as a new life had begun in the wake of the Reaper War.

Approaching the Vancouver Alliance headquarters where the hospital that housed Commander Shepard was nestled, Hannah pushed herself up from her seat within the shuttle and stretched her limbs, stiff from the three hour journey from the _Orizaba_. Acknowledging the respectful salute from the pilot as he opened the shuttle doors after landing it safely onto the landing pad, Hannah jumped briskly down from the shuttle's hovering height to the tarmac below her, steadying herself on her legs and adjusting her dress blues. Stepping forward from a parked skycar was her brother Steven, looking as fierce as ever, a handful of new wrinkles added to his face. Waving off her salute, he opened the skycar door for her and beckoned her inside without so much as a hello.

Hannah stepped into the skycar's seat, respectfully quiet of her brother's somewhat rude greeting as Hackett opened the driver's side door and seated himself before the driver's console.

"What's wrong with you?" she finally dared ask as the skycar rose and began to speed through the Alliance base in the direction of the hospital.

"Long day," Hackett muttered quietly. "Stress. Too much to do, not enough manpower to do it. A few troublesome uprisings in some of the refugee camps, unsatisfied with what that the Alliance is doing for them. Coffee shortages. Rear Admirals abusing their power and making unauthorized private calls through deep space..."

Hannah smiled wryly to herself, sitting back against her seat. Her brother had always been a stickler for the rules and regulations. It was part of what made him one of the best Admirals that the Alliance had ever seen. "I seem to remember you yourself using official comms to send your own niece black-op like missions when she first became Spectre though, or do you need reminding of that?"

Hackett scowled in Hannah's direction.

"I learnt it all from you, big bro," Hannah replied fondly.

"Let's just hope that this week is the week that Miss Lawson is able to bring Shepard out of her coma," Hackett muttered as he landed the skycar outside the entrance to the hospital. "I'm all for biding time until the time is right, but there's only so much the Alliance can do before the uprisings in the camps turn into a fully-fledged rebellion against us. The people need her to unite them again. Remind them that the Alliance is not their enemy."

Traversing the familiar route to the intensive care unit through the hospital corridors as if in auto-pilot, the siblings finally reached Shepard's hospital room, the security duo of Alliance soldiers ever present in their vigil against paparazzi and onlookers. They could hear the beeping of machines through the tinted glass doors, the murmur of familiar voices behind them. As the doors to the room automatically opened Hackett stepped back politely to let Hannah enter first, their dress blues still sizzling and steaming from the decontamination program they had passed through before entering the intensive care unit.

"Ah, perfect timing Admiral, Rear Admiral," Miranda smiled from Shepard's bedside, expertly balancing her flashing omni-tool with one hand above the still form of Shepard and a datapad in the other. Behind her, Doctor Michel and the intensive care nurse on shift were preparing a trolley with an array of syringes, tubing and ominous looking vials "We are just about ready to bring Commander Shepard out of her coma back to consciousness. Shall we begin?"


	12. Chapter 12

 

 

A familiar sweet scent with the slightest hint of eezo, reminiscent of a childhood spent living aboard space shifts wafted into Commander Shepard's nose. Mixed with the harsh antiseptic smell of her surroundings, Shepard scrunched up her face unconsciously as the scents ticked her senses. The small effort of her muscles in her face to contract ached painfully, the sensation akin to working a pulled muscle. It was sharp and unexpected, enough to prompt the Commander to slowly open her heavy eyelids in a state of haze, her mind encased in a thick dense fog that was taking its own sweet time to dissipate. She groaned, automatically trying to sit upright, but her muscles would not obey. She fell back among the pillows as her muscles ached in protest, her senses processing the load of sensory input as she came to.

"Well hello there, sunshine," a familiar voice with an Australian accent piqued to the left of her head. "Welcome back to the land of the living." Shepard groaned again, trying to turn her neck to see where the voice had come from.

"Try not to move, Shepard," Miranda instructed gently. "You are severely de-conditioned and your muscles had begun to atrophy. You are going to need a lot of therapy."

Shepard closed her eyes and swallowed thickly, her throat dry with lack of use, her tongue heavy and furry in her mouth. Beside her, the machines monitoring her vitals continued to beep rhythmically, with only the machine monitoring her neural activity racing as it displayed her brain activity.

"Do you know where you are, Shepard?" Miranda asked as Doctor Michel flashed her pen light into Shepard's eyes, causing her to blink furiously, her muscles protesting at the effort. The good doctor smiled down at Shepard with her kind eyes, giving her shoulder a gentle squeeze before turning to face the monitors at the bedside.

"Wouldn't have the faint... faintest clue," Shepard croaked. "Was hoping you'd... tell me."

Vaguely aware of a familiar-looking older woman sitting next to her beside, Shepard slowly turned her neck to bring her into her line of sight, her heavy hands grasped between her mother's as she stroked Shepard's softly between her fingers. Immediately she was able to place the source of the familiar scent. "Mom," Shepard smiled. "What are you…?"

Hannah Shepard, unable to control herself at the sight of her daughter returning to consciousness, very vocally let out the floodgates, unable to hide behind the stern Rear Admiral façade any longer. "You are never, _ever_ leaving my sight again, Miss Aurora," she spluttered through her tears. Behind her Shepard could see Admiral Hackett standing respectfully behind her mother, his face softening as he observed Shepard's return to consciousness. He nodded his head slowly, a smile tugging at his lips as his niece took him in through half-closed eyelids, giving her the smallest of salutes as he raised his fingers to her forehead.

As the fog around her head lifted, Shepard began to process all of the sensory stimuli assaulting her eyes, ears and nose. The bright lights of the hospital room, the beeping of machines, Miranda and Doctor Michel at her bedside. It took a moment before waves of memories prior to her comatose state began to flood back; the final battle for Earth, evacuating Kaidan and Garrus into the _Normandy_ during the push to the beam, the almost-lethal energy of Harbinger's laser disintegrating her armor and burning her skin. She closed her eyes against the onslaught of memories as they overwhelmed her, her eyes flickering beneath her eyelids. Painstakingly making her way to open the Citadel arms, the final confrontation with the Illusive Man, the death of Admiral Anderson...

Coming face-to-face with the Catalyst, the intelligence responsible for creating the Reapers. Sticking her middle finger to the child-image of the intelligence as she slowly limped her way to destroy the Crucible's energy conduits, finally putting an end once and for all to the Reaper threat. Her eyes flew open, her heart rate beginning to race.

"I'm not… I'm not dead?" Shepard rasped.

"Far from it, Shepard," Miranda replied reassuringly, scrutinizing the monitor spitting out readings of Shepard's neural activity and the heart rate monitor as it became to beep dangerously. "Take some deep breaths. You're in an Alliance hospital. You're safe now."

Shepard painfully turned her neck to face her mother again. "The Reapers...?"

"Gone, Aurora. Defeated. We did it. _You_ did it. It's all over now."

"And Kaidan?" Shepard barely dared to ask.

"He's alive, Aurora. He's ok. The _Normandy_ is on its way home," Hannah gripped her daughter's hands tighter between her own, gently touching soft kisses to her pink and healing skin.

"The ba... the babe..." Overcome with a sudden fatigue, Shepard struggled to formulate her words.

"The baby is fine, my beautiful child," Hannah leaned forward and pressed her lips against Shepard's forehead. "The baby is just fine."

Hackett cleared his throat shortly. "Don't dwell on it right now, Commander Shepard," he instructed as his sister continued to cry softly. "We will give you a full update when you are recovered enough. Right now, you deserve a well-needed rest. Rest assured at the moment, everything is as it should be."

A wave of relief washed over Shepard as she slowly processed the news, her mind still in a state of haze from being comatose for over a month. She didn't know if she was in heaven, hell or still back on Earth, but if it was a world where the Reaper threat was finally gone and Kaidan and her baby were alive and well, she would take it.

* * *

The next few days passed in a state of a heavy and sedated daze for the Commander, despite a successful return to consciousness thanks to the administrations of Miranda Lawson and Doctor Michel. It had been spent under a plethora of painless acupuncture-like needles, regular pressure area care, gentle physical therapy and constant examinations and assessments by the former Cerberus Operative and Huerta Memorial doctor. Regular visits from her mother, Admiral Hackett and Thane's son Kolyat in the form of a tag-team had helped her pass the time as she floated in and out of sleep, comforted by the steady heartbeat of the resident within her womb, the knowledge that the life she and Kaidan had made together had a strong constitution and will for survival like its parents. Kolyat's visits in particular were especially helpful, as the Drell was able to help soothe Shepard's new-found anxiety in a way that her mother and the Admiral couldn't, particularly when he read from his father's book of prayers. It allowed Shepard to feel connected with the good friend she had lost, his memory kept firmly alive in the firm friendship that had sprouted between herself and his son.

Having spent well over a month in a coma, Shepard's body had been well on the path to healing physically, and as a result her pain levels once she came to were more than manageable for a battle-hardened soldier used to the injuries that came with war. Hell, she'd died of asphyxiation once, so the desensitized throbbing she still felt all over her body was a welcome reminder that she was alive in comparison. Coming to terms with the fact that she no longer had a right leg was not something that she had not been able to grapple with however, despite her predisposition to take things as they came. Once her pharmaceutical therapy to treat her muscle atrophy had been completed and she was able to sit reclined on her hospital bed, she was presented with the sight of a forlorn looking stump under her bedsheets where her well-muscled, strong and lean leg had once been. Her mind, so overcome with the new environment, new world and new circumstances she was facing had not quite accepted that it no longer had a right leg to control. Her non-existent right foot continued to tingle and twitch in her head between therapy, with only her mother's updates about the _Normandy_ 's crew and Kolyat's prayer readings partially able to distract her from the strange sensation. Still bed ridden, it was sometimes easy to forget late at the night when the intensive care unit was quiet that she still had two legs as the skin on her phantom limb continued to itch, ache and jerk occasionally in unison with her left.

Ever the caring and loyal Commander, it had brought an immense feeling of relief to know that her ship and crew had survived the energy surge and chain reaction of Mass Relays exploding after she had destroyed the Crucible, and were determinedly making their way back home despite the hurdles. Although she had accepted that there would be numerous casualties in the wake of her choice, it still brought a fierce pang to her heart to know that whilst she had saved the remaining organics of the galaxy from extermination, it was at the cost of a newly-sentient race that had embraced organics and willingly come to their aid, and the death of a much beloved crew member and friend. The memories of EDI, Legion and the Geth haunted her as she slept through the days after she was brought back to consciousness. Endless apologies on her lips, their corporeal forms behind the silhouette of Admiral Anderson and the countless lives that she had been unable to save in her mind had turned their backs to her, providing her with no closure making the choice to sacrifice them for the greater good.

Oh how far the mighty had fallen, Shepard had thought to herself sadly as Miranda helped her wash her face and body, the muscles in her hands still too weak to wring and scrub herself with a damp cloth. Here she was, the Milky Way's Saviour and fix-it-bitch, lying in a hospital bed, too weak to move, needing the assistance of nurses to attend to her personal care and hoist her into the bathroom. Whilst Miranda and Doctor Michel would step in to assist her with her whenever they could, it was still a big shock to the Commander to be incapable of even wiping her own bottom when she was a woman who could easily disassemble, clean and reassemble a rifle in the fraction of the time that it took other soldiers.

* * *

Admiral Steven Hackett stood in the door of Shepard's hospital room, surveying the sight of his niece lying in her hospital bed, the steady beeping of her vital machines long desensitized to his ears. She appeared to be sleeping relatively peacefully, given the barrage of information she had received in the last few days since she had been awakened from her comatose state. Admiral Hackett had spent some considerable time at Shepard's beside when she was awake and alert to discuss small details of the final battle and its outcome, but the Commander could tell that her uncle had glossed over the finer details due to her more fragile state.

It brought some comfort to the Admiral knowing that after everything Shepard had been through to rid the Galaxy of the Reapers, that she was finally able to get a decent rest without the use of medication.

To the right of the room behind the glass windows of the adjoining doctor's bay, Miranda Lawson and Chloe Michel sat on their chairs nursing a cup of hot coffee together, relaxed in their posture with their feet on the desk before them. The duo had formed a strong bond in the short time that they had spent working together since Doctor Michel had requested that the Alliance seek out the former Cerberus Operative. The sounds of them both laughing and chortling away was somewhat muffled behind the semi-sound proof glass as they shared stories. As he watched, Doctor Michel appeared to be gesturing the size of something with the length of her hands, causing Miranda's gasp and sputtering of coffee all over the former in what appeared to be in shock.

"I know you're there, Admiral," Hackett heard Shepard call softly. He crept up to her bed softly to find her lying with one eye slightly open.

"I had thought you were asleep, Shepard," Hackett replied in the way of greeting.

"It's proving a little difficult, with that duo in there," Shepard nodded in the direction of the doctor's bay.

"I can ask them to keep it down...?"

"No no, don't worry," Shepard said as she tried her best to sit upwards a little, wincing as her body ached. Giving up, she let her neck fall back among the pillows and pressed a button next to her hand with a shaking finger, the bed automatically moving her into a seating position. "Let them have their fun. I'm glad that they are able to be friends. After everything they've both done for me, they deserve a little fun on the job. I apologize respectfully for not being able to salute, Sir."

Hackett waved off her apology and seated himself in the visitor's armchair beside Shepard's bed, his older bones aching on the hard surface of the worn and old chair. "How are you feeling today, Shepard?" he asked.

"A little better than yesterday. Better and better every day. I can still barely move. Don't have the strength yet to try utilize my biotics to see if they've been damaged. Still feeling like I have two legs." Shepard craned her neck to look down at her right stump, trying to lift it in order to show the Admiral. Unable to quite summon the strength to lift it from her air mattress, she flopped back amongst her pillows, looking frustrated at herself. Unconsciously her hand slowly made its way to rest protectively on her slowly-growing bump. "The perks of being in a coma for so long mean that I no longer seem to have any morning sickness, which is a bonus. I'm so weak at the moment I'd probably drown in my own vomit. Any news from Kai- from the _Normandy_ , sir?"

"Major Alenko checked in this morning with via QEC," Hackett replied. "By his reports they are making good progress. ETA back to Earth in approximately two and a half months, if their current trajectory continues."

Shepard nodded in satisfaction, a small smile softening her tired features.

"You look a little preoccupied, Admiral," she added, noticing that he seemed a little reluctant to talk about the topic obviously weighing on his mind.

"I um, attended the meeting with the Citadel Council yesterday afternoon," Hackett began, the reason for why he had come to visit.

"Yeah. Mom mentioned," was all that Shepard replied. Hackett remembered that Shepard did not have the best memories when it had come to dealing with the Council in the past.

In the wake of the end of the war and the successful effort in uniting all of the Galaxy's races in fighting against the Reapers, it was the mutual decision of the remaining council races that all species should have a place on the Council. Security, peace and prosperity, the Turian Councillor Sparatus had explained, could only be achieved if the Galaxy remained united and moved on as one to a brighter and prosperous future. Being the only remaining original Councillor left alive after the Reapers had claimed the Citadel, the other races had followed suit with his suggestion and quickly welcomed the Krogans, Quarians, Hanar and even the small number left of Batarians into the fold. It was a group of new leaders representing the survivors of their species that Shepard did not want to ever be in a room with, and she did not envy the Admiral one bit.

"Any talk of who Councillor member for Earth is?" Shepard asked, remembering that the only position that had not yet been filled was Councillor Udina's. Given the circumstances of his death, the Citadel Coup and the passing of his short-lived successor, the Alliance had not been quick to fill the rather large shoes the disliked Udina had left behind.

"There have been... nominations," Hackett replied somewhat vaguely. "I won't bore you with the names. Rest assured I will tell you when we have voted for one. The Council is very eager to meet with you, once you are recovered enough and able to make the journey to the Citadel. "

There was a brief pause, Shepard looking slightly annoyed as she chewed her lip at Hackett's vague reply. "Miranda and Doctor Michel assure me I will be in hospital for _quite_ some time yet," she smiled wryly. "Rehabilitation and growing a little human is tough business."

"I wanted to be the one to tell you first that the Alliance would like to arrange a public ceremony when you are recovered to give you a second 'Star of Terra', Commander."

"Oh yay, another paperweight."

"The Asari, Turians and Salarians would also like to present you with their own honours of a 'Shield of Athame', 'Nova Cluster' and 'Star of Sur'Kesh', respectively."

Commander Shepard did not reply, a slightly pained expressing crossing her scarred and freckled features.

"You don't seem at all pleased, Commander," Hackett observed.

"I don't want them," Shepard whispered hoarsely. "They should be awarded to every soldier, civilian and person in between that fought hard, living and dead, to help us win this war. I don't deserve these accolades any more than they do, Admiral. Let them be the ones acknowledged for their sacrifices and giving up their lives so that we could all live. I was just lucky enough to be one of the ones that survived."

Hackett nodded, acknowledging Shepard's unwavering lack of selfishness. "The Council are also talking of a new honour, given on behalf of all of the Council races," he continued, "to recognize any courageous or distinguished service across all species that has been above and beyond the call of duty. They want to call it the 'Sword of Shepard'."

Shepard balked a little at this news. "Oh please no," she gasped a little. "I am honored that they wish they name an accolade after me, but at least have something that doesn't sound tacky and appropriate to my battle style. I have never used a sword in my life."

"I can see what you mean," Hackett replied thoughtfully.

"How about the 'Sniper of Shepard'? 'Biotic Charge of Shepard'? 'Flare of Shepard'? Or even 'Supernova of Shepard'? That last one has a nice ring to it."

Hackett chuckled softly. "I will mention it to them the next time we have a meeting." He paused, noting the Commander's reluctance in receiving recognition for her efforts during the Reaper War. "You have no issue over the Council commissioning an award in your honor, Shepard?"

"I don't think it matters if I mind Admiral, they're still going to do it anyway. I am truly honored that they are thinking of special recognition to give on behalf of all the Council races. I guess they may as well name it appropriately."

"The plan is that you will be the first recipient that the award is ever bestowed upon, Commander."

Shepard fell silent again, her face falling.

"Look Shepard, these are not set in stone yet," Hackett hastily added, not wishing to upset the Commander in her current state. "But part of being an Alliance soldier is accepting accolades when they are due, and it is of the opinion of all of the races and our own that you are more than deserving of these awards, given everything that you have been through and done. Don't dwell on it for now, others will be receiving recognition where it is due also. Think of the boost it will give to the people knowing that their War Hero is going to be honored as she should be."

Shepard rubbed her swollen stomach absentmindedly, preoccupied with the news.

"Well, I hope that you will not have an issue with my own personal award that I will certainly be bestowing on you as soon as you have given birth. 'Five kegs of beer- can you hack-it?'" he chuckled to himself at the lame joke.

Shepard burst out laughing, the sound a thrill to Hackett's ears. "Oh heck yes, Admiral Sir," she replied jovially, a beautiful and genuine smile spreading across her healing face. "Better make it ten kegs though, to make up for my nine months of sobriety!"

* * *

In the long days that followed her return to consciousness, Shepard spent most of her waking time watching the fetal monitor next to her bedside, its steady beeping rhythmic and soothing to her ears, a reminder that her baby was a fighter, hanging on to life and growing stronger and stronger with each passing day. It had positively astounded Miranda that the baby had managed to survive everything that Shepard had put her body through in the weeks leading up to the final mission to retake Earth, let alone the firing of the Crucible, countless life-threatening injuries and comatose state.

Nineteen weeks into her pregnancy, and Shepard still could not believe the fact that she carried Kaidan's child within her, _their child_ , their love and devotion to each other united togther in the form of a little life beneath her skin. With no morning sickness akin to what she had experienced prior to the final battle against the Reapers to remind her of its presence in her womb, the thought that she was going to be a mother in four months time seemed unbelievable, a fantasy she had fabricated after an amazing shore leave on the Citadel with her Major.

She was interrupted in her musings, picturing a small wrinkly newborn with her jet-black hair and Kaidan's warm brown eyes, by a commotion as the door as Miranda dramatically pushed a massive device on wheels into the doorway of her hospital room. The former Cerberus Operative had clearly underestimated the size of the device. Looking ever so perfect in her tight spandex suit and high-heeled boots, she flicked her soft brown hair to one side and turned the device around, easing it slowly through the doorway with no further contact. The tinted doors to the room closed behind her.

"You haven't had a proper anatomy scan since finding out you were pregnant, have you Commander?" Miranda asked, positioning a high-tech device above the hospital bed. It vaguely reminded Shepard of the Alliance-commissioned MRI machine that were used specifically on Alliance soldiers, a rare scanning instrument that allowed Shepard's medical team to safely undertake scans despite the presence of cybernetics and biotic implant in her body, contraindicated in regular MRI machines. The omni-sound machine's concave core was slowly positioned by Miranda's expert hands atop of Shepard's abdomen where her small bump grew. "Five months pregnant already, I think it's about time we had a good look at baby Shenko, see how things are progressing. Maybe even find out what you're having?"

Shepard shook her head adamantly. "No. I haven't changed my mind, Miranda. I want to wait for Kaidan. I want us both to find out baby's gender together."

Looking slightly disappointed, Miranda dialed up the machine at the holo terminal and it began to buzz with activity, iridescent orange lights glowing on Shepard's lower abdomen, her pink scars pronounced in the harsh light.

"Have you felt any movements yet, Shepard?" she asked, playing with the settings of the machine. It beeped ominously as she fiddled around. "Gah, it's been a long time since I've had a play with one of these machines."

"I don't think so," Shepard replied, looking down at the curve of her stomach, ever growing as each day went by. "Sometimes I think I'm feeling something but given that cabbage has been on the hospital menu most nights, I'm more inclined to think it's gas."

Miranda chuckled, seating herself on a wheeled stool at Shepard's bedside and positioning a holo screen in the Commander's line of sight so that she could see the scan. "Just relax, Shepard. I'm just going to check on the baby's growth, look for any abnormalities- not that there will be any there, do not worry," she hastily added as Shepard made to sit up in alarm, "check the placenta, all of the general stuff."

Shepard looked at Miranda dubiously. " _R_ _elax_ , Shepard," Miranda repeated. "And stay still."

As the omni-sound machine began to scan, Shepard wiggled uncomfortably as a warm sensation flooded the skin of her abdomen. Her stump of a right leg began to tingle uncomfortable, an itch that Shepard tried to remember was not really there.

"Your placenta is a little low," Miranda noted, her tongue between her teeth. "Positioned anterior too, that would explain why you haven't felt noticeable movement yet. And... aha!" She tapped away at the terminal, the instrument humming and moving loudly above Shepard's swollen stomach. Miranda turned around on her stool and pointed to the holo screen before Shepard. "And here is your baby, Commander!"

Displayed on the holo screen before them was the projection of a tiny human, curled up in fetal position, snug amongst the safe confines of Shepard's womb. Looking at the baby through untrained eyes, Shepard was at first barely able to ascertain a little squish of a face, button of a nose, an open mouth as the baby obviously yawned and began to punch at the umbilical cord that tickled its face. A rush of emotion flooded her system as she began to make out the little face of the baby Kaidan and she had created, its little fingers and hands, its legs and toes and it kicked and rolled. Tears began to well in Shepard's eyes, overcome with a rush of love for the little resident in her stomach, awash with feelings that she had never quite experienced before.

"Active little babe, isn't it?" Miranda smiled fondly, her eyes transfixed to the screen with Shepard. "Perfect size for a baby of nineteen weeks gestation, give or take a few days. Ten fingers, ten toes, no signs of abnormality. I have certainly never seen so much brain activity in such a small fetus, but then I am no obstetrician. A perfect little human, as far as I can tell!" Miranda paused, eyeing the Commander in her state as she watched the little life turn and kick on the screen, her face overcome with emotion, tears flooding down her cheeks. "Drink the sight in, Shepard," she patted Shepard's hand warmly. "This little baby is the start of a whole new life for you."


	13. Chapter 13

_Kaidan's lips trailed kisses down and across the soft skin of Shepard's neck and shoulders, his ministrations causing her to breathe heavily and writhe underneath his exploring hands. As she arched her back, his mouth trailed from the delicate curve of her collarbones and hollow at the base of her neck before capturing the taut nipple of her breast into his mouth. Grunting in satisfaction as Shepard mewled underneath his flickering tongue, he teased and taunted the sensitive skin, reveling in the feel of her digging and dragging her fingernails into his back in ecstasy, savoring the feel of his skin burning in their wake._

_Capturing the Commander's mouth again with his, Kaidan continued to devour her, touching and tasting, his mind in a headspace that it could only go to when he was making love to Shepard. A haze of iridescent energy encased the two lovers as they both lost control of their biotics amongst their passion, the mass effect fields their grinding bodies generated giving them the sensation of weightlessness, the heat of their implants abuzz as they caused a sheen of sweat on their skin._

_Unable to contain himself any longer, Kaidan hooked his hands behind Shepard's knees as she straddled him in their foreplay, turning and flipping her to lay flat beneath him across the bed of the Citadel apartment. Her black hair sprawled across the soft down pillows, the Commander's green eyes were vivid and ablaze with heat and passion as she panted heavily. Taking in the site of Kaidan positioning himself above her in his full glory, she smiled cheekily and made a 'come hither' gesture with her finger, the sight of which caused Kaidan's knees to wobble as he began to throb with the need to release. As he carefully placed himself astride the Commander, Shepard wrapped her long and lean legs around Kaidan's waist, pulled his face down to hers to reclaim his mouth, and nudged him forward with her ankles to enter her warm and wet sheath. She gasped under his lips as he stretched and filled her, her legs tightening around his waist as she clenched her muscles and thrust up against him, desperate for him to consume her._

_It didn't matter how many times Kaidan made love to the Commander- every single time was a new experience, a roller coaster of emotions as they rediscovered each other's bodies. Since their first physical reunion after Shepard's resurrection, he had worshiped every encounter, every opportunity to explore her body, to bring her to levels of ecstasy she had experienced with no other. As he pounded into her and brought her to the edge of the precipice, her groaning and whispering of his name against his ear spurred him on, the knowledge that she was all his encompassing his mind and senses. Gasping into her neck they both reached their crescendo together, their bodies and minds exploding in unison, the mass effect field generated in their passion caused a shockwave to blast out from the radius of their connected bodies. Gadgets from the bedside tables and the clothes that they had hastily relieved each other of in their haste flew across the room in the surge of energy, the lights above the bed and the bedside lamp shattering among the force._

_Continuing to thrust slowly against each other as they came down from the heights of their mutual climax, Shepard held Kaidan's head against hers and she drank in his unique smell, feeling the bristles of his hair underneath her fingertips. She shuddered, still in the throes of ecstasy as his hands wandered across her curves, capturing one of her breasts and pressing feather-like kisses against her salty and sweaty skin. Shepard clenched Kaidan's body tighter against her own with her tightly-woven legs against his waist, reluctant to allow him to leave the warmth and embrace of her body. She nibbled at his ear delicately, causing him to moan and tremble atop of her._

_"Words cannot express how much I love you," Kaidain murmured against Shepard's skin, overcome with emotion as he reveled in the body of the exquisite woman underneath him. "I could do this all day, every day, with you for the rest of my life. I just want to drown myself in you, Shepard."_

_Shepard chuckled and pressed her forehead against his, still gasping slightly to catch her breath._

_"There's nothing I want more, Kaidan," she gasped as she laughed, Kaidan tracing a soft trail with his fingertips down the valley between her breasts, snaking his way to her waist and smiling in satisfaction at the sight of her skin forming goosebumps in the wake of his exploring fingers. "Just let me replace the lights with something more durable, I'm getting a little tired of having to replace light fixtures three times a day." Kaidan laughed heartily above her, his body causing tingles in her core as he shook, having not yet made to unsheathe himself from the valley between her legs in the aftermath of their lovemaking. He was anchored safely in the sea of Shepard, and he was content to stay shipwrecked within her for the rest of his days._

* * *

Kaidan lay sprawled across the bed he had shared with Shepard in the Captain's quarters of the _Normandy_ , his mind aflame with the memories of one of numerous intense nights of lovemaking with Shepard almost four months ago on the Citadel during their shore leave. With their journey back to the Sol System on track, coupled with the knowledge that Shepard had awakened from her coma and was well on her way to recovery, the Major was left in a state of euphoria. His body ached physically to be reunited with its lover, the one woman that had connected with him like no other woman he had ever been with before.

Kaidan's hands moved slowly to the buckle of his fatigues as he panted softly, his mind consumed with the image of Shepard's body sprawled underneath his own, all his and no one else's. He fumbled with the buckle of his belt, eager to shed himself of his clothes and spend the rest of the night with Shepard in his imagination, light years away from where she awaited him back on Earth.

"Bridge to Major Alenko," Joker interrupted loudly across the _Normandy_ 's intercom in a voice audibly lacking enthusiasm. "There's something here that you need to see. Immediately."

* * *

"You so did that on purpose Joker," Kaidan muttered as he entered the cockpit, head reeling, body still achingly on fire with the thought of Shepard.

"No sir, don't have a clue what you're talking about." Joker replied flatly.

Liara nodded to the Major from her position standing next to Joker's chair, a strange look on her face. Kaidan noted the lack of mass effect field encasing the _Normandy_ , indicating that the ship was not currently traveling at faster-than-light speed. He looked at Joker and Liara questioningly. "Is there a reason why we are not at FTL, Joker?" he asked, ever cautious, a tendril of worry beginning to sprout at the back of his mind.

Joker looked at Liara flatly, obviously reluctant to talk in his ongoing depressive state. "We are currently passing through the Exodus Cluster, Major," Liara began slowly, appearing to be weighing her words carefully. "Specialist Traynor and I have found something that we believe might interest you."

"Oh?" Kaidan asked, his interest piqued. Like Commander Shepard, Kaidan's morals would not allow the _Normandy_ to pass through the system if there were lives in distress that the crew would be able to assist.

"Yes," Liara replied, encouraged by Kaidan's positive response. "We immediately picked up an encrypted distress call on secure channels once we entered the system." She pointed out of the cockpit windows to the silhouette of what appeared to be space-station in the far distance before them, suspended in the dark and empty expanse of space. The space station was small, and appeared to be inactive and deserted, with no lights or visible activity. "The source of the distress call is from that station. We were able to encrypt the message easily, due to past... encounters. The only thing is..."

As the station slowly rotated in the void, Kaidan was able to make out the diamond-shaped logo emblazoned across the metal hull, its orange and white paint glistening under the scrutinizing lights of the _Normandy_ as the ship slowly approached. Kaidan's eyebrows crinkled together as he frowned. The sight of the Cerberus logo was not something he had been expecting to see throughout the journey back to Sol, his impression that Shepard and the Alliance had destroyed any Cerberus footholds and bases in their assault against the Illusive Man. "It appears to be deserted," Kaidan observed, noting the lack of twinkling lights, energy readings from the station scanned by the _Normandy_ 's scanners at a bare minimum. A barrage of debris littered the void outside of the station, the remains of what appeared to be capital-class Reaper ship amongt the twisted metal and charred remnants of man-made vessels.

Liara tapped Joker's shoulder. "Play the message, Joker."

Kaidan leaned heavily against the pilot's seat as Joker's fingers flew across the terminal. The image of a worn-looking man adorned in the white attire of a Cerberus scientist appeared before the holo screen of the _Normandy_ 's cockpit, the image flickering and unclear as the scientist visibly tried to adjust the focus of the camera on the terminal before him with his hands.

" _This is Doctor William Frantelle, leader of the former Cerberus Cell, Project Core`,_ " the man projected on the message addressed the camera, his voice sounding weak and flat. " _We desperately require assistance. We had defected with the terrorist group and were targeted for termination by the Illusive Man."_

An immediate sense of familiarity overcame Kaidan as he heard the doctor's voice. He pushed the vague sense to the back of his mind and thought no more of it as he redirected his attention back to the audio.

" _Our base has been severely damaged by hostile Cerberus ships, which ceased when the Reapers entered the system and destroyed them. As far as we can tell, the Reapers forces that entered our base and killed most of my team of scientists have been rendered completely inactive. We have been left stranded in this system and are desperately low on supplies of rations, clean water and medical aid._ " The audio became barely audible as static interrupted the connection _." We desperately require extraction and asylum. There are a number of surviving scientists aboard our station; we are able to offer any resources we have that may be of any use, any intel on Cerberus. Our estimates are that our supplies will not hold out for longer than fifteen weeks. I repeat..._ "

The distress call restarted as it re-looped and began to replay. Joker waved a hand over the terminal before him, cutting the audio, the image of the visibly distressed scientist frozen on the holo screen before them. Liara looked at Kaidan questioningly.

The Major's mind raced as he weighed the implications and risks of establishing contact with the former Cerberus base, his mind abuzz as he asked himself what Shepard would have done. Reminiscent of her determination to safely extract defected Cerberus scientists from the secret base on Gellix, the thought of leaving lives stranded in the middle of a silent system to starve and perish far outweighed his dislike of Cerberus and everything that the group had done to hinder their efforts during the Reaper war.

"Open a direct channel, Joker," Kaidan instructed, clearing his throat. Receiving a non-enthusiastic thumbs-up from the pilot to signal that the channel had been established, he leaned forward.

"This is Major Alenko of the Systems Alliance frigate _SSV Normandy_. We have received your distress call and are ready to render assistance."

There was a lull across the comm as there was no reply, static continuing to murmur and buzz.

"How old is this message, Liara?" Kaidan asked the Asari. Liara focused her attention to the holo screen atop of Joker as he remained silent in his pilot's seat. "Approximately three months, Major," she replied.

"I repeat, this is Major Alenko of the Systems Alliance frigate _SSV Normandy_. We have received your distress call and are ready to render assistance."

Liara shook her head, her lips pursed as there appeared to be no reply from the Cerberus base. "Perhaps we are too late?" she asked sadly, her voice reflecting her disappointment. Kaidan bowed his head, pushing himself off of Joker's seat with his well-muscled arms.

"Do you have any information on this particular Cell, Liara?" Kaidan asked the former Shadow Broker.

"Not at all," Liara replied, activing her omni-tool and quickly scanning through her notes as they streamed from her information terminals in the deck below. "Like with all Cerberus Cells, we don't know of their existence or purpose until they complete their purpose. How it managed to survive the war when the Reapers have all but obliterated the colonies in the system is an act of the Goddess. I think it would certainly be worth boarding the base, suss it out. We might at least be able to scavenge it for useful supplies."

Kaidan nodded at the practicality of the Asari's advice. "Tell Lieutenant Vega and Garrus to suit up and be ready in the shuttle bay to board the station," he instructed. "You gear up too, Liara. We'll do a quick sweep of the base, salvage any supplies, check for survivors. I'm not hopeful that we will find anything, but at least we can say we tried."

* * *

Kaidan flexed and relaxed his right arm and hand absentmindedly, unconsciously testing his biotics as he held onto the shuttle's railing with his other free hand as it quickly closed the distance from the _Normandy_ to the seemingly-deserted Cerberus base. Behind him, seated in the alcove of the shuttle, Garrus fiddled with the settings of his Widow sniper rifle as James watched transfixed at the sight of the Turian expertly prepping his weapon. Liara sat beside the Turian beside them, immersed in her omni-tool, the orange glow of the device casting a strange light over her blue features.

Shutting down the small mass-effect field he had generated with his free hand, Kaidan slowly crossed the interior of the shuttle to the cockpit where Lieutenant Cortez was piloting, concentrating on the looming scene of damaged and seemingly lifeless space station before them as the shuttle inched closer and closer. "Can you see any undamaged hangers to land the shuttle in, Cortez?" he asked the pilot, scanning the outline of the base as the shuttle's sensors scanned the station's exterior.

Cortez pointed to top right hand side of the station, its location beckoning them on the screen. "This shuttle bay appears to be relatively undamaged," Cortez replied. "Scans are indicating that the bay has vented though, so you will need your helmets until you can re-pressurize the hanger. I should be able to land the shuttle here for you to safely disembark, there doesn't seem to be any contraindication to this specific location. No sign of Reaper activity whatsoever, or signs of any hostile forces for that matter. It appears completely deserted."

"Sounds good. Take us in Cortez," Kaidan slapped his hand of Cortez's shoulder in thanks and made his way back out of the shuttle's cockpit to the door of the shuttle, unlatching his M-37 Falcon rifle from the back plate of his armor in order to begin depositing grenades into its barrel. Counting out a number of specialized grenades from the ammo pockets of his armor and into the barrel of the gun, Kaidan clipped the weapon into place and latched the rifle back onto his armor plate. He turned to the squad members as they prepared to disembark from the shuttle. "Okay, Team Milky Way," Kaidan instructed in a what he hoped was a positive tone. "Our first priority is to look for any survivors." The squad nodded in unison, acknowledging his orders. "Second to that, scavenging any supplies that we can locate, any technology that might prove useful in our journey back to Sol." The shuttle shook as Cortez directed it into the shuttle bay of the Cerberus base, Liara holding on for dear life to the shuttle's ceiling railings as it shook and puttered before coming to rest on the flat metal surface of the hanger's floors. "Helmets on until we can repressurize the hanger. Keep on your toes and watch each others' backs. We don't know what we're going to encounter while we're exploring." The squad nodded, their eyes wide under the cover and lights of their helmets. All three made to the shuttle door where it opened with a hiss as the interior of the shuttle vented.

"We'll keep in contact with you, Cortez," Kaidan added to the pilot, his voice slightly muffled through his helmet as he made to step off of the shuttle behind Garrus, Liara and James. "Turn off all systems and turtle up, safer for you to pretend you're not here until you hear from us." Receiving a thumbs up from the Lieutenant, Kaidan disembarked from the shuttle, the glass of his helmet fogging up slightly under his deep breathes as he surveyed his immediate surroundings.

* * *

The Cerberus base appeared to be mostly deserted, with systems shut down in what appeared to be an attempt to conserve critical power. The Major, Turian, Asari and Lieutenant slowly made their way down the eerie hallways of the base from the shuttle bay hanger with their weapons at the ready, ever vigilant of any sound or movement.

The station that housed the members of Project Core` appeared to be vast and extensive, the squad relying heavily on schematics Kaidan had downloaded from a terminal that his omni-tool had been able to provide an emergency power source to. He had been able to pinpoint on one of the lower levels a small living area next to life support systems that appeared to still be running on minimal power, indicative that if any survivors remained they would be located there. It made sense, Garrus had suggested, to turtle down within the base in an effort to stretch supplies as the Cell hoped and waited for a ship to receive and reply to their distress call. It was difficult to ascertain the purpose of the Cell from their surroundings, with the numerous rooms and what appeared to be laboratories in lockdown.

As they turned a dark corner to an elevator shaft, Kaidan brought up the layout of the station again, peering at the map with his tongue between his teeth as his eyes flickered to and fro. "We should be able to climb down this shaft two levels and be straight at the active living quarters," he observed. "James, can you get the doors please?"

James clipped his M-96 Mattock rifle onto his armor for safekeeping as he flexed his muscular arms. "Can do, amigo," he replied confidently, always happy to show off his conditioning. Having spent two months in space, it had been a long time since the Lieutenant had been groundside, and he was eager to put whatever skills he could to good use. "I will have it open in just a second."

The ever-confident James stepped forward, prying his armor-clad fingers into the small groove between the doors in an attempt to heave them open. He grunted and puffed as the heavy metal doors would not budge, the seconds slowly passing as the squad watched on patiently. James shoulders sagged somewhat underneath his thick and heavy armor as he took a moment to catch his breath, the elevator doors unyielding beneath his meaty arms. "I urrr... might need your help, Garrus," he admitted quietly out of the corner of his mouth to the Turian standing behind him.

Garrus chuckled, his mandibles clicking together as he stepped up to the elevator doors. "Shepard would have had this door open in less than a second.Just saying, James."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," the Lieutenant replied gruffly, clearly annoyed. "I'm a little rusty, is all. Been cooped up on that ship with only weights and bars to maintain my fitness, what do you expect." Together with Garrus, there was a ear-splitting screech of scrapping metal as the elevator doors slowly began to slide open, James and Garrus panting together at the effort. Liara began to clap slowly in praise, only to be met with a glaring look from James, causing her warm smile and hands to falter.

"Good job," Kaidan encouraged, waving off the flickering holo of his omni-tool with a flick of his wrist. He gripped his Falcon rifle tighter beneath his fingers and stepped forward towards the beckoning black hole of the elevator shaft. "Follow me."

The sound of ablative ceramic armour plates landing heavily onto metal echoed and vibrated amongst the confines of the elevator shaft as the Major jumped down onto each level beneath him where a gap in the metal grill floor presented a ladder, the team following suit. Slowly and steadily, Kaidan led the team as they navigated the tight confines of the shaft, the lights of their armour casting ominous shadows on the walls around them, determined not to look down at the dark void beneath them where the elevator should have gone. Kaidan could hear Liara inaudibly muttering underneath her breath behind him as she trailed after Garrus, the faint hue of her biotics radiating from her person as she did her best to maintain her balance. He remembered that the Asari had never been particularly good with heights.

As the team slowly trudged their way down to another set of thick and heavy metal doors James and Garrus automatically stepped up without instruction and dug their fingers into the groove, grunting and panting at the effort to open the shaft to the floor of the living quarters. They were met with the sight of a corridor with dimmed lights as the doors slowly grinded and screeched open, the low hum of activity and life support systems in the distance before them. Taking a moment for their eyes to readjust to the change in light, the squad slowly stepped forward out of the shaft, inching slowly into the corridor.

" _Pew! Pew! Pew! I'm going to tear you apart! Raaarrr!_ " the cries of two little humans came skittering around the corner, stopping in their tracks in surprise as they were met with the sight of Kaidan, Liara, Garrus and Vega standing before them.

"Who are you?" one of the little boys asked curiously, taking in the sight of the squad's thick and heavy armor, the outline of their weapons. His eyes widened as he quickly placed his arms protectively around the smaller form of the child with him. "No, wait! Please don't hurt us!"

"Daddy!" the smaller child of around four years turned around and went running in the opposite direction as the older remained frozen before the team. James pointed his rifle and made to follow, promptly stopped by Kaidan in his tracks as he raised his arm to stop him.

"Hi there," Kaidan spoke gently, addressing the older child. "I promise I'm not going to hurt you. My name is Major Alenko. What is your name?'

A figure clad in a Ceberus scientist flew around the corner, immediately rushing to the child and gathering him in his arms. "Please, do not hurt him!" the man pleaded, shielding the little boy from the squad's view. "He's an innocent little boy, he hasn't done anything!" Kaidan noted that it was the same person that had initiated and recorded the distress call. Again he felt the vaguest recognition of the voice of the terrified scientist, but could not quite place it.

"We're not here to hurt anybody," Kaidan quickly reassured the panicked scientist. "Quite the opposite actually. My name is Major Alenko, acting Captain of the Systems Alliance ship _SSV Normandy_. We received a distress call and tried to initiate contact. We didn't receive a response, so we boarded the station to investigate. We're here to help."

"You'll forgive if I am a little skeptical," the scientist's voice wobbled in his fright. "Cerberus never had a good track record with the Systems Alliance, even defectors like us." He clenched the child closer to his chest, shielding the little boy's frightened face from view.

"Doctor Frantelle, I assume?" Kaidan asked, extending what he hoped was a friendly hand to help the scientist up from his crouched position on the floor. Eyeing Kaidan's outstretched hand with wary eyes for a moment, the scientist finally took it as Kaidan gently pulled him to his feet. The child, who appeared to be approximately six years of ages, clung to his father's knees, curiously watching the squad despite his obvious fear. "That is I," Frantelle replied cautiously. "I am the leader of what was once Project Core`. We broke off with the Illusive Man after we were made aware of the change in... values and have been hiding in our base within this system ever since. Unfortunately he managed to locate us, but the Reapers quickly decimated his forces before turning their target on our team."

"How many survivors are there, Doctor?" Kaidan asked, smiling encouragingly at the frightened child at Frantelle's feet. "In your distress call we received you stated that you were dangerously low on supplies, seeking refuge?"

"A handful of my best scientists, sir. And my two children. That's all. We were deep within the base when the Reapers boarded and began their slaughter. Somehow before they reached us, some sort of energy force washed over the station and made them completely redundant. We had never seen anything quite like it. We spaced the remaining Reaper corpses after it was clear that they were no longer a threat to us, as we didn't want to risk indoctrination."

"The Reapers have been destroyed," Kaidan assured the scientist. "You won't have any more issues with them, I can guarantee that."

"The Reapers were destroyed? How...?"

"We can explain it if you return with us to our ship. If you could take us to your remaining scientists and explain exactly what Project Core` is, we can discuss possibly offering you asylum out of this system, Doctor Frantelle."

"Please, follow me," Frantelle straightened, clasping his son's hand within his own and nodding to the other members of Kaidan's squad in what he hoped was a friendly acknowledgement. "I will tell you anything, if it means getting my children out of this hell."

* * *

"This is going to sound very strange Doctor, but I could swear I recognize your voice from somewhere," Kaidan asked the scientist as they sat at a table in the living quarters. To his left, James and Vega stood to attention as Liara scanned a private terminal before her with her omni-tool as she gathered data, always the information broker. The smaller boy who has run off to find his father earlier sat at James' feet, looking up in awe at the big hulk of Alliance soldier standing before him. James avoided the little boy's interested eyes, clearly uncomfortable with the unwanted attention.

"I highly doubt that, Major Alenko," Frantelle replied politely, placing a steaming cup of what appeared to be instant coffee in front of the Major as a peace-offering of sorts. "Our work was top secret, even among the Cerberus elite. Only the Illusive Man truly knew of our purpose."

"And what exactly was that?" Kaidan asked as the scientist sat down heavily opposite him, clearly fatigued and stressed. Frantelle rubbed his eyes tiredly. "Where do I start," he replied softly. "Before I tell you I hope that you can listen to my explanation of our work with an open mind Major. I imagine most would be... prejudiced, I guess you could say, given the war with synthetics that we all have barely managed to survive."

"I promise you there will be no judgement," Kaidan reassured the scientist. Out of the corner of his eye, he noted James bending down to pick up the small child behind Frantelle's back, flexing his arms up and down as he tested the weight of the little human beneath his grip. Slowly, the Lieutenant began to lift the boy up and down, the biggest look of delight crossing the child's innocent features. Two surviving scientists watched the meaty soldier and child from their corner as they began to pack what little personal valuables they had in the hope of being evacuated off of the station, slightly mistrustful of the _Normandy_ 's squad but desperate to be taken back with the team when they returned to their ship.

"Almost four years ago now I led a small team of scientists on a secure Alliance base that were tasked with the experiment of creating a... controllable AI, of sorts. Top secret. Only those involved and top Alliance brass were aware of the experiment, given that AIs were considered "taboo" and developing any were illegal in Council Space. Myself and Doctor Gintoki over there," Frantelle nodded in the direction of another scientist in the living quarters who was downloading data onto portable holo drives for transport, "were recruited secretly by the Alliance after working for _Synthetic Insights Ltd_ for a number of years."

Kaidan looked at Frantelle a little blankly, clearly not understanding the significance of the name. " _Synthetic Insights_ was a company commissioned by the Citadel Council to do research into artificial intelligence, Major."

"Ah, I see. Please continue, Doctor."

"This experiment was code-named the "Hannibal System" by brass. Gintoki and our team were able to successfully develop a VI from scratch that eventually went rogue and became hostile to anyone on the base. We were evacuated amongst the carnage that ensued and given strict orders to never breathe a word about our experiment to any one. I had assumed that the Alliance had removed the rogue VI and taken care of it, and moved on. Our team and I were stripped of all of our notes, all of our research. A number of months after, Gintoki and I were approached by an agent of Cerberus on behalf of the Illusive Man."

Kaidan was getting the strange sensation of deja vu as he listened to Frantelle recount his past, reminded heavily of a mission with Commander Shepard during their pursuit of Saren to eliminate a rogue VI back on the Luna Base. Absentmindedly wondering just how many rogue VIs the Alliance had actually been responsible for, he felt with sudden a pang of guilt that the leaders of Earth did not exactly have a clean record when it came to illegal activity and crimes against humanity.

"The Illusive Man offered us unlimited resources, credits, security, even the research files and remains of the rogue VI from the original experiment. Anything we needed to create a fully functioning AI. I will admit that the thought of being the first to ever create a functioning artificial intelligence was... a reminder of why I ever applied for employment with _Synthetic Insights_ in the first place. It had been a childhood dream of mine to create a world where we lived harmoniously with AIs, burdening the heavy weight of society for us. I will admit I had my reservations about working again with this particular VI, given the mess left in its wake when it went rogue, and some of the suggestions of the Illusive Man to bring it to self awareness were a little... extreme, to say the least."

"Were you successful?" Kaidan asked, sipping the weak and bland coffee politely, genuinely intrigued.

"We were," Doctor Frantelle replied, his eyes slightly glazed as he reminisced over his past achievement. "With access to anything we wanted, _everything_ we needed brought straight to us within the blink of an eye, we were able to restore the VI and bring it to true self-awareness. The Illusive Man did not cut corners when it came to the project at the time. Back then we were known as the Hannibal Cell." Frantelle sighed deeply. "The day that AI became self aware, was the biggest highlight of my career. I will never forget it."

"What happened to the AI? What did the Illusive Man use it for?" Kaidan asked.

"We installed the AI onto a frigate commissioned by the Illusive Man. We were instructed continued to maintain feeds from her through deep space as the ship and its crew went about their mission. When the ship and its Commander went rogue, we were ordered to commence preparations to create another AI that would intensely loyal to Cerberus. Our Cell was renamed to Core`. What did you say the name of your ship was, Major? It sounded vaguely familiar."

" _SSV Normandy_."

Doctor Frantelle raised his eyebrows in surprise. "What a coincidence," he mused. "The name of the frigate we installed the first AI on was _SR2 Normandy._ Must be a popular name for ships."

Kaidan balked at Frantelle's last comment, spitting bland coffee all down his front. Suddenly able to pinpoint where he had heard the scientist's voice before, back on audio logs at the Illusive Man's base, Kaidan was overcome with a wave of understanding. A light bulb had gone off in his head, its light finally connecting the load of information that the scientist had presented to the Major. Behind him at her terminal, he heard Liara gasp loudly as the rest of the squad slowly made the connection.

"Wait- what was the name of this AI?" Kaidan asked quickly.

"Her name was Enhanced Defense Intelligence, but we nicknamed her EDI. She was quite unique, and her personality was rather endearing. The boys and I were a little disappointed when we lost contact with her. She flooded our server with seven zettabytes of explicit images on our last communication. I imagine it was her idea of a joke. Amused Gintoki and I to no end, even though that was the last time we established contact with her." Frantelle chuckled to himself, unaware of Kaidan's realization before him.

Kaidan's heart began to race, the irony of their fateful encounter with the defected Cerberus scientists suddenly clear in his mind. Surely it could not have been a coincidence that of all systems to pass through, of all distress calls to answer, this particular former Cerberus base housed the remains of scientists who were responsible for creating, _bringing life_ to the beloved artificial intelligence of the _Normandy_. As Liara would have put it, an act of the Goddess.

Liara crossed the room quickly from where she stood with Garrus and James to the table with the Major and Doctor sat, leaning her small hands onto the hard surface and peering closely into Frantelle's eyes, causing the doctor to lean back somewhat in the invasion of his personal space. "Let's just say, hypothetically speaking doctor," she began in a low voice, her blue eyes steadily locking onto the doctor's tired hazel ones, "that this artificial intelligence- EDI, as you call her- was severely damaged fighting during the Reaper war and seemingly "deceased", I guess you could say. Would you and your remaining team have the knowledge or the resources to revive the AI? And I'm not talking about a simple upgrade of cyber suites, or anything along those lines. I'm talking about full rewiring and reworking adaptive codes and hardware, bringing back her fried software and programs to full functionality."

"I urrr... I guess we could? I mean, as long as you still had her specialized quantum computer, also known as her blue box, I am certain she could be fixed. It wouldn't be an easy task, to be sure, but... And to ensure that the personality of an AI is maintained, we would just have to make sure that the original blue box is repairable, otherwise variations in new quantum hardware and run time results would create unpredictable variations which would essentially change her personality and memories... Wait, are you meaning to tell me that your ship is the original _SR2 Normandy_ that was made by Cerberus? My EDI is aboard your ship? "

Liara practically fist pumped as she pushed herself off of the table, a large smile crossing her soft blue features as she looked at the Major in triumph. "Myself and my crew would like to offer you asylum on my ship, Doctor Frantelle," Kaidan smiled as he stood up from his chair, extending a hand to shake the scientist's across from him, his mind cemented on his decision. "You and your children are in need of safe harbor, and we are in need of you and your teams' skills to bring back our ship's AI from the graveyard."

* * *

" _SSV Normandy, this is Major Alenko,_ " Kaidan tapped into his ear piece as he watched the bustle of the remaining scientists and Doctor Frantelle's children gather their belongings and whatever supplies they could salvage, a positive buzz stirring in the dusky atmosphere of the soon-to-be-abandoned Cerberus base.

There was a moment before Joker's unenthusiastic reply. "Yes sir?"

"Have some of the crew begin to prep the cargo bay with camp beds and facilities to house newcomers," Kaidan directed. "We are going to have some very important guests come to stay with us on our trip back to Earth."

"I'm not one to be a party pooper Major, what with you channelling Shepard's big heart and all, but are you sure we really should be accommodating these defectors? You've known them for what, three hours?"

"I assure you Joker, you will be happy to see these guys on board when I debrief you on our return."


	14. Chapter 14

Shepard looked up and down, surveying her naked reflection in the floor length mirror of the hospital room ensuite as her nurse bustled behind her preparing the shower chair, her eyes somewhat downcast and glassy as she took in the sight of the reflection looking back at her. She took a deep and shuddering sigh, touching her fingertips gently to the the outline of her ribs protruding above her diaphragm as she inhaled and exhaled.

The Commander looked like a shell of the woman and soldier that she used to be, despite the slow and steady process to recondition her body back to her pre-morbid strength. Her previously un-scarred body, still relatively fresh from her resurrection by Cerberus and mostly undamaged from her mission against the Collectors was now laced with an array of fresh pink scars, her naturally pale and freckled face gaunt and sunken from the months of receiving nutrition intravenously. Not to mention that sight of a stump that remained where her right leg should have been. The black tufts of hair that had quickly grown across her head as a result of her biotically-induced fast metabolism had left her somewhat recognizable, although the strands lacked the lustre that they once had. Her green eyes no longer had their previous sparkle and vivacity in the deep hollows of her eye sockets, dark bags clearly visible underneath her newly curling eyelashes.

Balancing herself precariously against her forearm walker as she removed her weak arms from their supports, Shepard turned herself as best as she could to see the swell of her stomach in the mirror where her baby grew. Her skin taut over the pronounced curve of her growing womb, there was no denying the little life that grew there as she felt the tickling sensations of butterfly wings fluttering underneath her skin. Twenty-two weeks pregnant now, Shepard's baby had certainly begun to make its presence known, with its flutters and occasional little kicks causing Shepard to catch her breath and pause amongst her physical therapy sessions, pressing her hands to her growing bump and reveling in the movements under her fingertips. It was now a regular reminder to Shepard that although her battered and weak body may never return to that of the lean and battle-hardened soldier that she once was, it now had a more important purpose of harboring the little life that she and Kaidan had created during their Citadel shore leave, ensuring that the little human she was bringing to life was nurtured and secured away from the eyes of a world that could seek to hurt it if it knew of its existence. In the numerous media coverage of Shepard since the end of the war, the news of her pregnancy had been kept strictly away from the prying and nosy eyes of the news reporters and paparazzi. It was of Admiral Hackett's opinion that Shepard's personal life should be kept as under the wraps as possible, the Savior of the Galaxy deserving of some well-earned privacy and respite.

Shepard's nurse placed her hand under the spray of the shower head, testing the temperature. Satisfied that it was of a comfortable degree, she set the hand-held nozzle in its place next to the shower chair and straightened up. "The shower is ready, Commander Shepard," she beckoned gently. "Shall we do the same as yesterday morning? I will wait behind the curtain, and you can pretend that I am not here except if you need me?"

Shepard turned slowly, balancing on her one leg carefully as she leaned forward to grasp the frame of her forearm walker. "I might need a little assistance with washing my back today, Anna," she admitted wearily, placing her arms into the support rests and her the stump of her amputated leg in the special support that the physiotherapist had added to her frame. "Therapy took a little more out of me this morning than usual." Sufficiently embraced by the frame and ignoring the painful stabs in her stump as she shifted most of her body weight onto it, the bottom of the frame screeched against the cold and wet tiles of the bathroom floor while Shepard slowly began to push herself forward with her left leg, beads of sweat quickly accumulating on her brow as she clenched her teeth with the effort.

* * *

"Boo yah, rehab ward, here we come!" Jack crowed in an enthusiastic voice, grasping the handles of Shepard's wheelchair and positively flying out of the hospital room that the Commander had called home for the past three months.

Shepard gripped the arms of her wheelchair, holding on as best as she could for dear life. She hadn't had any morning sickness since before she had been placed into a medically-induced coma, but she was beginning to feel the waves of nausea rear its ugly head as it began to wash over her again.

"For crying out loud you psychotic biotic, stop it!" Miranda ordered, hustling behind Jack and Shepard as she attempted to keep up with the wheelchair being positively propelled by a jet of biotic energy down the sterile hallways of the hospital, nurses and doctors alike quickly moving out of the way of the projectile in an effort to avoid getting flattened. "Do I have to remind you _again_ that Shepard is pregnant?"

"Yeah, yeah, precious cargo aboard, I know," Jack replied sarcastically over her shoulder, her biotics immediately fading. "Don't get your panties in a knot, cheerleader." The biotic considerably slowed the pace of the rolling wheelchair down by digging her thick rubber combat boots into the linoleum, the slightest look of guilt crossing her face. "You know, she's only growing a little parasite, yeah? Shepard hasn't actually turned into glass or anything last time I checked. Have you, Shep?"

"Not quite. About to turn into a vomit fountain, though," Shepard replied weakly, her face positively green as she took in deep gulps of air, trying determinedly to keep her mind off of bringing up the contents of the breakfast she had managed to get down her hatch that morning.

After three weeks of gentle physical therapy to recondition her body into a stronger state, Shepard had finally been deemed strong enough by Doctor Michel to be suitable to transfer out of the acute wing of the Alliance hospital and into a rehabilitation ward on the other side of the facility. It was a ward specifically designed for the use of injured soldiers, well out of the way of the eyes of the media and curious individuals intent on getting a glimpse of the Savior of the Galaxy. The private section of the hospital housed everything Shepard would need to utilize on the next stop of her long journey to a full physical recovery, albeit it a little different in definition of "full" due to her pregnancy and amputated leg. Ever the considerate Commander, Shepard had firmly rejected any suggestion of doctors growing her a leg to replace the one she had lost, adamant that the resources should be used for more important purposes. It was hard to ignore the uprisings within the refugee camps featured on the news reports in response to stretched resources and supplies. It hardly seemed fair to her to waste the time and effort it would take to successful grow a functioning limb from stem cells when there were still numerous civilians in need of organ cultures and transplants.

In order to begin fitting and slowly transitioning her to a prosthetic leg, the likes of which were rarely seen used before the war except by those who could not afford the technology to have a limb regrown, Doctor Michel had stated it was better to Shepard's recovery to continue at the specialized rehabilitation facility. Adjacent to the enclosed and secure ward was access to a shooting ground, physical conditioning gym and hydrotherapy for Shepard's use, surprisingly mostly intact during the Reaper's assault on the Alliance headquarters. Informed that she would have a tough few months ahead of her, with the physical changes to her body and bone structure making an impact on the difficulty it would take to adjust to mobility with a prosthetic limb, Shepard had gritted her teeth and remained steadfast in her refusal of wasting any more unnecessary time and resources on herself, eager to master the prosthetic before Kaidan and the _Normandy_ returned to Earth.

"Here's hoping the food's better on this side of town," Jack quipped as she pushed along Shepard's wheelchair, crossing the pavement between buildings and taking a gutter a little too hard, jostling Shepard in her seat. "I'm getting a little tired of eating the slop that they've been serving Shepard lately."

"Please don't mention food," Shepard replied weakly from her chair, her voice slightly muffled as she pressed a firm hand to her lips.

Miranda rolled her eyes at the biotic's comment. "What are you doing here so often anyway, Jack?" she asked, smoothly strutting across the concrete, as cool as ever. "Shouldn't you be with your students?"

"They're all having well deserved extended shore leave, if you must know," Jack glared sideways back at Miranda. "Trying to find their families, get back to rebuilding their homes, that sort of stuff. Forgive me for wanting to spend my own time off making sure the Shepard gets taken care of properly."

Shepard began to zone out silently as Miranda and Jack continued to squabble, magpie-like, as they slowly made their way to the north side of the base in the direction of the rehabilitation ward. Swallowing thickly at the bile that continued to rise up into her throat, Shepard tried to concentrate on breathing in the fresh cold air of the beautiful Vancouver morning, savoring the feel of the warm sun on her pale skin as the stump that remained from her amputated leg continued to throb and tingle annoyingly in her mind. Beneath the swollen curve of her stomach, her baby protested against the chortling and bustle of Jack's wheelchair driving, delivering a rather forceful kick that made her catch her breath. It was still taking time to get used to the consistent reminders of the little baby that had taken residence in her body, the overwhelming surge of love she felt every time the baby poked and prodded at her.

"What room was it, bouncy boobs?" Jack asked Miranda, peering at the holo map before them as they entered through a set of automatic glass doors.

"Anderson Wing, room thirty-six," Miranda replied.

"That's a little depressing," Jack muttered under her breath, gripping the wheelchair and heading off in the left direction.

Shepard's heart sank a little as she realized that the rehabilitation wing she was headed to had been named after the late Alliance Admiral and friend. She felt tears threaten to surge, blinking them back desperately so that Miranda and Jack could not see. Her pregnancy hormones were certainly making it difficult to keep her emotions in control these days; her mother's update about the _Normandy_ and Kaidan the previous day had caused a barrage of tears that had taken well over an hour and a full tub of chocolate chip ice cream to cease.

"When was Anderson's memorial meant to be, again?" Shepard asked Miranda quietly as they slowly trudged through the unfamiliar corridors.

"Admiral Hackett mentioned that it would be organized when you were well enough to attend," Miranda replied simply. "No point having it if you can't be there, you need to be able to say goodbye too." Shepard nodded slowly in response.

Narrowly avoiding a dying pot plant, Jack navigated the wards' hallways and parked the wheelchair in front of a rather pleasant looking and spacious room, clearly boasting a view of what remained of the Vancouver skyline from the hallway of the ward, the bright sun creating a bright and warmly atmosphere. "What, no eye candy guarding this room?" Jack asked in a disappointed tone, her face falling.

"Thank god for that," Shepard replied, tapping the side of the chair as the waves of nausea began to ebb. "Push me in, Jack."

So used to the sterile and clinical environment of the intensive care unit, it was a welcome change to Shepard to be moved to another room that was more comfortable and homely. She noted with a small smile that she would no longer be sleeping in a stiff hospital bed, with a queen-sized standard bed beckoning to her warmly from the its position against the wall. Despite the numerous railings positioned strategically around the room to aid in mobility, the monkey bar above the bedhead and the standard nurse call bell and oxygen units on the wall, it seemed almost like a comfortable pre-war hotel room. Jack whistled as she pushed Shepard through the doorway, drinking in the sight. "All it needs is a mini bar, and you're all set Shep. Wanna have a slumber party tonight?" she joked, ignoring Miranda's exasperated sigh behind her.

"Only if you bring your own food this time," Shepard replied, reaching over to lock the brakes of the wheelchair and push herself slowly into standing position. Her left leg held as it wobbled under her weight, her growing bump more pronounced than ever.

"Wow, you really are pregnant," Jack sighed at the view of the Commander, swollen with new life, so different from the fierce weapon-wielding Shepard attired in thick combat armor that she was so used to. "You're like a big, fat, beached, pregnant whale." She gestured strangely with her intricately tattooed arms and hands. "Ready to explode in only a few months time, the likes of which your foo foo will never quite recover."

" _Jack_!" Miranda cried indignantly.

* * *

Shepard pushed her dinner tray away on the portable table that her nurse had placed above her bed, panting heavily as the ghost of her right leg sent sharp pains up her thighs that radiated up her waist. Already exhausted from an afternoon spent with extensive one-on-one time with a prosthetic limb specialist to mold what remained of her leg with a carbon fibre limb, she was struggling to ignore the insanely real sensations that Doctor Michel had described to her previously as phantom limb pain, a common experience to most amputees.

Shepard wasn't sure if it was because of the extensive poking and prodding to the already sensitive stump, but what remained of her right leg had been pulsating painfully for hours, the sensations so intense and real that she had grinded her teeth in an effort to disconnect herself from the signals that the non-existent limb was sending her brain. Beads of sweat began to trickle again across her forehead as the sensations began to become markedly more painful, searing at her senses, her heart and breathing rates increasing. In response, the baby somersaulted uncomfortably in her womb. Trying vainly to distract herself with the promise of a pudding cup, Shepard tried to adjust herself into a different position as she sat on the bed.

 _It's not there anymore_ , Shepard tried to remind herself, closing her eyes as her chest heaved, beads of salty sweat beginning to trail over her lips as she fumbled with the stiff plastic of the pudding cup. _This pain you're feeling isn't there. You don't have a right leg anymore, you know that. Isolate and block off the pain. It's all in your head._ Shepard leaned back heavily among her pillows on the queen-sized bed, the sight of the right leg of her trousers bulking as it lay atop of her bed sheets giving the slightest visual impression that somehow, a limb was dressed within it. It teased at her as she involuntarily twitched with the pain signaled by the injured nerves in her right thigh, taunting her like a school yard bully.

_It's not there. IT'S NOT THERE. IGNORE IT. THE PAIN ISN'T REAL. BLOCK IT OFF, IGNORE IT-_

With a guttering shriek, Shepard clutched at the steak knife from the dinner tray beside her and rammed it home into the empty leg of her hospital trousers where her right leg should have been, the sound of splitting material unnoticed to her ears as they pounded under the rush of blood. A gasp of relief escaped her lips as she drank in the sight of the sharp knife embedded into the trouser pants, the floodgates opening as her emotional state succumbed to the physical stress, tears streaming down her cheeks. Slowly and surely, the overwhelming sharp and stabbing pains of the phantom limb began to ebb into a dull throb, Shepard's breath rasping and heavy as she clutched her chest, the adrenaline that had flooded her body causing her to tremble involuntarily.

As a nurse scuttled into the room in response to the blood curdling cries, he surveyed the sight of an emotional Shepard before him, the knife rammed deep into the empty pant leg. Immediately understanding what he was seeing, he hurried forward and ripped the knife out of the mattress, throwing it onto the abandoned dinner tray. Grabbing the material of the pant leg he quickly folded it upwards to form a roll until it met the base of where Shepard's knee used to sit, fastening it temporarily with a roll of tape he produced from his pocket. Before him Shepard sobbed as she cradled her own head between her hands, the ghost of her limb aching in unison with her heart as she craved Kaidan's comforting arms, the support of the man who should be here with her during her recovery but wasn't.


	15. Chapter 15

The countdown to reaching the Sol System aboard the _Normandy_ was finally on. After over twelve full weeks of faster-than-light travel across half of the galaxy, the crew of Commander Shepard's mobile command centre were finally on the home stretch, the promise of their home world intermittently beckoning the crew out of their depressive state. With less than four weeks to go, their trajectory right on track thanks to a newly-invigorated Joker and the ever diligent Specialist Traynor, they could practically taste the crisp Earth air, and the feel of solid ground once again below their feet.

The presence of Doctor Frantelle's team of remaining scientists from the Core` Cell was the source of new-found hope for the _Normandy_ 's pilot and crew members that had been grieving the loss of the ship's AI. Joker, in state of elevation fueled by hope that the scientists would be able to resurrect EDI, hobbled about the ship's decks as he once done since before the AI's death. Finally moving out of his camp in the bridge, Joker had attempted to remove EDI's plaque prematurely from the ship's memorial wall, only to be talked out of the idea by Garrus and Tali. Aware that the pilot was not thinking entirely clearly at the time, it had been their excuse that Joker and EDI could remove the plaque together once she was revived, a suggestion that Joker had latched onto positively as he limped back off to the makeshift lab erected in the AI core. Unable to bring themselves to disappoint Joker, the Turian and Quarian were ever conscious of the fact that despite the scientists' skills and positivity, some things that were broken just couldn't be fixed.

With the hustle and bustle of the _Normandy_ 's cargo bay and armory, the makeshift quarters for the scientists had been moved up to the crew deck into the starboard observation lounge for practicality and convenience of the scientists, as well as for the safety of Frantelle's extremely curious and playful sons. Little bouncing balls of energy and testosterone, the duo were delighted to have taken up temporary residence in a military vessel, utilizing every minute of their father's time in the AI core to explore the nook and crannies of the ship, getting under the feet of the crew members. Despite the annoyance of tripping over the boys amongst the crew's duties, it was hard to dislike the innocent and carefree energy they brought to the flat atmosphere of the struggling ship. Rather than threatening to eat the youngsters, even Javik had taken a liking to the duo, taking the time to tell them Prothean jokes and stories in his dolorous voice, much to the amusement of Liara.

Kaidan sat in front of his half-empty tray in the mess hall, poking at the cooling remains of his half-eaten dinner as he watched Traynor and Cortez take turns to batter away at the contents of large metal bowl with a spoon, the delighted forms of Nicholas and Allister Frantelle perched on the high bar stools behind the counter top. The smells emanating from the kitchenette were a little unappealing to the Major's tastes, with the shuttle pilot and Specialist attempting to bake what the boys had dubbed "Krogan cakes" due to the shapes of the haphazard cupcakes once they left the oven. The kitchenette reminded Kaidan fondly of a Tuchanka bomb site, reminiscent of when Commander Shepard regularly commandeered the facilities for her late night cooking rituals.

The boys cheered and clapped as Cortez triumphantly upturned the metal bowl to show the firmness of its contents as it remained in place, indicative that the batter had been beaten enough. The sounds of the boys' delight turned to shrieks of laughter as Cortez's face, after nodding to Traynor with a mock air of satisfaction and raising an arm to receive a round of praise, fell in disappointment as the batter succumbed to gravity and landed on the marble counter-top with a sickening _splat_.

Shaking his head as he chuckled softly, Kaidan shoveled a small spoonful of mashed roots into his mouth, trying to ignore the grainy and bland texture of his rations. The Major was pleased that the crew were being so accommodating and hospitable to Frantelle's team and his children. Wary of some of the crew's attitudes towards Cerberus after the Illusive Man's betrayal of the Citadel to the Reapers, he was proud that Shepard's crew, so very like her in spirit and actions, appeared to hold no grudges over the Cerberus defectors. The former Cerberus scientists had been welcomed onto the _Normandy_ with open arms, particularly by Kenneth and Gabriella in engineering, who had once met Doctor Frantelle in passing during the construction of the ship. Despite supplies and resources being stretched thin already, the crew had tried to accommodate all of the needs of the scientists, particularly in creating a laboratory with equipment salvaged from Project Core`'s base within the AI Core where EDI's heart and mobile platform lay.

Conscious of the lack of crucial supplies that would be required to possibly resurrect the AI, Kaidan and his team had all but stripped the former Cerberus base before leaving the Exodus Cluster, a mass accumulation of electrical equipment, hardware and assorted salvage littering the cargo bay- much to James' annoyance at having to maneuver an obstacle course to get to his weights. Frantelle and Gintoki had been reasonably confident at first that they would be able to restore EDI with technology that remained on their station, given that it was the same base that they had originally brought EDI and Eva Core` to life.

There was a soft tap in Kaidan's ear as his earpiece turned on, the static causing his L2 implant to tickle on the base of his neck. "Major Alenko?" he heard Doctor Frantelle ask softly, almost as if he were whispering.

"Yes, Doctor?" Kaidan answered, abandoning his spork on his tray.

"I would greatly appreciate it if you had a moment to step into the AI Core," the doctor whispered, clearly not wanting anyone around him to know that he was contacting the ship's executive officer.

"Won't even be a second, Doctor," Kaidan replied briskly, pushing himself away from the mess hall table and stretching his arms as he quickly crossed the small distance to the _Normandy_ 's med bay where the AI Core was housed behind it.

* * *

Kaidan was met with the sight of the five scientists, clad in Alliance fatigues and data pads, their omni-tools casting orange shadows over the silent consoles of EDI's hardware as the AI core bustled with working energy. Frantelle sat hunched over EDI's mobile platform in its alcove at the back of the Core on a wheeled stool, a small lamp fixed to his head as he angled it to shine into the intricate and complex wires deep inside a small hatch hidden on the back of EDI's neck. Behind him, Joker peered over his shoulder as the scientist delicately poked the wires with thin metal instruments, talking animatedly and clearly breaching Frantelle's personal space. It didn't take an observant person to know the reason for Frantelle summoning the Major to the AI core.

"Ah, Major Alenko," Frantelle greeted him with a voice that hinted somewhat of relief.

"How are things going in here, Doctor?" Kaidan asked, crossing his arms and leaning against a wall as he took in the sights of the scientists working on the various hardware towers and equipment that made up EDI around the room. EDI's Quantum Blue Box lay delicately across a large table, its contents sorted and laid out with organization and precision.

"I'm just working on EDI's mobile body. It's main power source had been completely fried, but I have been able to repair components with salvage and your small cache of element zero. Unfortunately work on other areas are not going as productively as I was hoping," Frantelle replied, gritting his teeth as he dug around in the innards of EDI's mobile body, her holo visor flickering under his ministrations. "We are facing a number of... unexpected hurdles."

"Hurdles? What hurdles? You never told me anything was wrong!" Joker asked, panicked.

Frantelle peered at Joker from underneath the light of the lamp positioned on his forehead. "For good reason Mister Moreau," he replied politely.

Kaidan unraveled his arms and beckoned to Joker. "Joker, can you wait for me in the med bay, please?"

"But I need to know-"

" _Now_ , Joker."

Cursing under his breath, Joker hobbled off out of the AI core, the automatic doors closing behind his hunch-backed form.

"Thank you, Major," Frantelle deposited his delicate instruments onto a small tray next to EDI's mobile body and sat up straight, cracking the bones in his neck and knuckles. "Moreau's constant attention has been a small hindrance to our work, to say the least."

"He means no harm," Kaidan replied sadly. "I don't think anyone has had the heart to tell him to leave."

"Oh, I can understand that," Frantelle quickly added. "Engineer Donnelly updated me on the close relationship that Moreau had with EDI. If it had been my children or my wife, I would be doing the exact same," he paused, closing his eyes as his thought painfully of his wife who had been slaughtered during the Reaper invasion on the Project Core` base. "Anyway..."

"Yes. What are these hurdles that you mentioned? Or are they all Joker-getting-in-your-face-related?"

"Some unforseen and unexpected issues have arisen. By Donnelly and Daniels' reports, some form of energy washed over the ship when Shepard fired the Crucible. Now like with most systems on the ship, we could expect with time and resources it would be repairable. When we started work we had no idea of the extent of the damage or what had actually caused it. EDI's hardware on the other hand... her data files are still in tact, thanks to Core`'s body. We were able to successfully create that AI without the use of Reaper tech, so we will easily be able to transfer those files back that EDI had stored in Core`'s blue box when she took possession of the platform. EDI's Quantum Blue Box, however, was interlaced with Reaper tech from Sovereign, and it appears that a critical overload occurred during the energy surge that has completely burnt out the Reaper tech, as well as some other vital software." Frantelle shot off on a spiel of speedy and complex dialogue, the likes of which even Kaidan's tech-savvy brain could not quite understand.

The Major blinked at the scientist blankly. "You might have to dumb it down for me, doc."

Frantelle handed Kaidan a data pad as he sighed, propelling himself across the room on his wheeled stool to stop before the table adorned with the contents of EDI's blue box lay as he beckoned the Major to follow him. "We can definitely repair EDI to a degree, there's no doubt about that," he replied, looking somewhat disappointed. "Give us a few more weeks and we can restore her partially to the full functionality of the _Normandy_ 's VI. See these though?" he picked up the charred remains of what appeared to have once been a vast circuit of some kind, interlaced with small valleys and ridges akin to the exterior shell of Reaper tech Kaidan had encountered before. "To resurrect EDI back to a complete AI, exactly who she was before she died with the same personality and memories, we're going to need to find an intact fragment of Sovereign to perform complete repairs to her blue box."

"Oh, shit," Kaidan whispered.

* * *

The doors to the AI Core opened as Kaidan stepped through into the med bay, looking slightly downcast and preoccupied.

"Not cool, man," Joker growled at the Major from his seat in Chakwas' empty chair by the med bay windows. "Not cool."

"You were getting all in the scientists' faces, Joker," Kaidan replied. "You need to give them space to do their work."

"I don't care. How dare you have the audacity to kick me out of there," Joker glared at Kaidan, a fierce look in his eyes as he balanced on Chakwas' chair. "If our roles were reversed and that were Shepard in there, how would you feel if someone dragged you away from her?"

"Joker, you can't keep comparing everything with me and Shepard," Kaidan replied gently.

"I have to. It's the only fucking way you'll understand me at the moment."

Kaidan did not reply straight away as he racked his mind for a delicate response, not entirely sure what to say to the pilot.

"EDI would want me to be there every step of the way, Kaidan," Joker added sadly. "Making sure that they get every detail right. I owe it to her."

"Look Joker, I can completely understand where your head is at right now..."

"How the fuck can you understand the head space that I'm in at the moment Kaidan?" Joker positively roared as he pushed himself off of the chair, uncharacteristic of his nature and limitations. "It was so easy for you! All you had to do was sit back, relax and be completely oblivious to the fact that Cerberus was resurrecting her for you all those years that you thought she was dead. You had moved on with your life. You got over her death. It's not as simple as that with EDI. I don't have the luxury of being completely oblivious to the chance that she might be saved. I have her on my mind every freaking minute of every freaking day, wondering if they're going to be able to bring her back, wondering if she's even going to remember me, let alone what we shared. How the fuck are you able to comprehend the insanity and worry that is going on and on in my head at the moment? _How?_ "

There was a pause.

"You know how ridiculous you're being at the moment, yeah Joker?" Kaidan responded softly.

Joker sighed and sat back down heavily, wincing as his backside hit the chair. "Just a little," he admitted ruefully. "But it's how I feel, Kaidan."

Kaidan and Joker sat in silence for a moment. "How did you move on?" Joker asked softly.

"I never did," Kaidan admitted sadly. "I might not have had the hope you hold for EDI that Shepard would be revived. But I relived the memories of her every night. Picturing her, worrying that I would lose every memory of every freckle, every quirk... memories were all I had of her, and after almost two years I was beginning to lose them. Maybe it's not quite the same as what you are experiencing at the moment now Joker, but I was in hell once too."

Joker looked down at his combat boot-clad feet. "Yeah, well. At least it won't be like this for much longer. The scientists know what they're doing."

"As positive as we all are Joker, we still have to prepare ourselves for the chance that they might not be able to fully revive EDI."

"Pur-lease. Cerberus brought Shepard's dead body back from the barbecue. If they were able to resurrect her, then they sure as hell will be able to bring back a synthetic AI," Joker waved Kaidan off confidently.

Kaidan stepped across the med bay and rested a firm hand on Joker's sagging shoulder. "We're probably going to need to locate a fragment of Sovereign in order to bring EDI back entirely as she was before she died, Joker. Her Quantum Blue Box can't be properly repaired without it."

Joker's expression fell instantly like he had been slapped across the face. "Oh, fuck," he whispered, his voice sounding strangled.

* * *

"Where the heck are we going to find a piece of Sovereign?" Kaidan asked Liara in dismay, perched on the end of her bed in her quarters. The former Shadow Broker tapped away at her terminal with a look of fierce concentration across her soft blue features, her brows furrowed as she and Glyph scanned through her numerous files for records of any Sovereign fragments. "I'll contact the Alliance through the QEC tomorrow during our routine check-in to see if there is any hint of any fragments available, but what are our chances of finding any intact piece of Reaper tech, let alone one originally from Sovereign?"

"What's the alternative if we cannot locate one?" Liara asked, somewhat distracted by the data she was perusing.

"The team can restore EDI somewhat to a VI. But she won't actually be EDI. Not without repairing the blue box."

"And it's not as simple as just making another blue box," Liara sighed. "I'm not finding any records of fragments of Sovereign available on the black market before the war, let alone anywhere else. Perhaps we might have to accept that we might not be able to fully restore EDI back to who she was."

Kaidan's shoulders sagged as he buried his face in his hands, a deep ache resonating in his heart for Joker.

 

 

 


	16. Chapter 16

"A piece of Sovereign. You've got to be kidding me," Rear Admiral Hannah Shepard balked at the flickering blue image of Major Alenko projected before her on the _Orizaba_ 's Quantum Entanglement Communicator.

"You can see our problem then too," Kaidan replied a little sadly, his voice somewhat fuzzy due to interference on the _Normandy_ 's end. "I had such high hopes that the scientists would be able to completely revive EDI. Sure, they can partially repair her to function as a VI, but it's just not the same. And Joker's mental state has gone downhill again." Kaidan paused, hanging his head. "I just wish we... EDI didn't deserve to be a casualty of this war, just when she was finally beginning to live."

Hannah nodded, recognizing the chances of reviving EDI to full functionality were slim to none. "You'll be hard pressed to find an intact fragment of any Reaper nowadays, let alone Sovereign. Most of them have been disintegrated into the sun. It has to be from Sovereign?"

"It _has_ to be from Sovereign," Kaidan sighed deeply, rubbing his forehead.

"You're all doing your best, Kaidan," Hannah replied in what she hoped was a reassuring manner. "I'm sure EDI would not begrudge your team and the Cerberus defectors for doing all that you could."

"Maybe. Well. It's not really a consolation to Joker, but he knows that we've tried. But let's change the subject. How is Shepard doing?"

"Better and better every day," Hannah smiled positively at the change of topic, a look of pride on her face. "Her physiotherapists are extremely impressed with her resilience and determination. She's about ready to throttle Hackett and I for not allowing her to travel to one of our ships to use the QEC to communicate with you directly, though. I sure raised a feisty one."

"That you did," Kaidan replied fondly. "Surprised she hasn't broken her way out of the hospital and snuck out onto a shuttle, to be honest."

"Oh, but not for the lack of trying, I assure you."

"Is there a particular reason she can't come up to the _Orizaba_? You said she's nailing her physio sessions?"

"Just Doctor Michel and Miranda Lawson being over-zealous, I think," Hannah replied, choosing her words carefully. She had almost gone on to let slip to the Major about her daughter's pregnancy. "They realize how eager she is to speak to you and her crew, but I think that they're just being careful while she's still recovering. Miranda and Doctor Michel are also conscious of... any triggers that going onto an Alliance vessel and seeing the debris fields around Earth and the Citadel might evoke. Hackett seems to also be a little too protective of her at the moment, she's somewhat sheltered at the headquarters, I guess you could say. Hasn't really seen much of what's been happening with rebuilding and such outside the walls. She hasn't shown me any signs of it yet, but there unfortunately is still plenty of time for her to develop symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. At the moment she just has to be content with official updates on the _Normandy_ 's progress from Hackett and I while she focuses on her rehabilitation."

Kaidan nodded. "I can understand that." There was a pause as Hannah watched the Major look tiredly down at his feet, shuffling them a little beneath him in a nervous manner that was so unlike him.

"Well. Please tell her that I love her, ma'am," he said, his voice breaking slightly. "And that she won't be waiting for me much longer. I've missed her so much. Soon I'll be able to tell her in person just how much."

"Less than two weeks, Kaidan," Hannah replied. "Not long now."

* * *

"When are you going to tell Aurora you've accepted the position of Human Councillor?" Hannah asked her brother as she watched him don on a new dress jacket, shrugging his shoulders up and down so that the jacket's shoulder pads would settle evenly across his broad back.

"I've been putting it off," Hackett replied, clicking his tongue softly as he took in his reflection in the mirror, clearly not used to the sight of himself dressed in anything other than Admiral dress blues. "After Anderson's experience, she'll tell me I'm making a terrible mistake."

"Quite the contrary. After what happened with Udina and the Citadel Coup, I think she'll be happy that someone we can fully trust will be in the seat."

"I hope so. It's the only reason why I am insane enough to have even contemplated about taking this position," Hackett mumbled.

"Secrets abound at the moment it seems," the Rear Admiral mused. "Major Alenko hasn't got the faintest clue that he's going to be a father, my good ol' brother is putting off telling his niece that he's accepted the position of Human Councillor like it's something to be ashamed of... She'll be proud of you, just like I am. Anderson would have been proud of you, too."

"Maybe," Hackett sighed, his fierce features softening.

"Come on, let's get going before you're late," Hannah beckoned her brother. "We've both got a shuttle to catch. You to the Citadel, me to Vancouver." Moving forward to meet her in the doorway of his captain's quarters, Hannah quickly reached out and fastened a button that Hackett had missed while his mind was preoccupied. "Mom and Dad would have been extremely proud of you too, Steven," she smiled a little sadly as she moved on to straighten her brother's tie. "Thanks to the sacrifice you're making, humanity can once again place their trust in their Council representative. Although..." She patted his arm in what she hoped was a reassuring gesture before returning to fixing his tie like a mother hen. "Dad would be turning in his grave if he saw how slack you've become with tying ties though. Got a little rusty with your dress blues, hey?"

* * *

Hannah stood in the doorway of the rehabilitation ward gym, watching the sight of her pregnant daughter lying across a bench press determinedly pushing at weights. Kolyat Krios perched on a stool behind her spotting her carefully, the glow of his biotics encompassing his body as he waited vigilantly for Shepard to require his assistance.

Ever the adaptable soldier despite her fragile state, Shepard had quickly mastered the use of the prosthetic leg during two weeks of physical therapy sessions and had begun to focus on walking longer distances and muscle building, much to the surprise of her physiotherapist. A task that would take any normal person months and months of extensive physical therapy to achieve, Shepard had knuckled down despite her more delicate state and surpassed all expectations with flying colours. Shepard's ever changing body and posture had proved ongoing hurdles that the Commander continued to overcome in her determination to be mobile by the time the _Normandy_ returned to Earth in two weeks time, but she had not yet achieved full mobility on her carbon fiber limb without the use of a crutch to aid her in her balance. After weeks of being able to finally eat solid food, Shepard's face was beginning to fill out and lose its gaunt appearance, a glow beginning to spread across her pale skin despite the fresh scars from her long recovery, and her figure beginning to fill out in feminine curves as her abdomen swelled with life.

" _Normandy_ update. Now."

"How about a 'please', Aurora. Pretty sure I raised you to have manners."

"I'll say please the day that you and Hackett actually approve for me to come to one of your ships and call them myself," Shepard muttered rebelliously through clenched teeth as she paused, her elbows shaking slightly under the strain of the weights. "Better still, dismantle one of your QECs and install it back here at headquarters. It would save everyone a lot of time and effort, don't you think?"

There was a moment of silence as Hannah ignored her daughter's rather narky remark.

"What's the latest news, mom? _Please_?"

"I'll tell you later over lunch," Hannah replied. "Aren't you perhaps over-working yourself a little, Aurora?"

"Hardly," Shepard puffed as she continued to pump the bench press. "This is nothing compared to what I used to be able to do. Baby enjoys the exercise. It's kicking me like a Krogan."

"It won't matter what you say to her, ma'am," Kolyat grinned at the Rear Admiral. "She's been practically living in the gym and shooting range, pushing herself as far as the doctors will allow her. She won't listen to Doctor Michel's advice to take it a bit easier."

"Shouldn't you be off doing that said doctor?" Shepard replied sarcastically, raising an eyebrow as she pushed the weighted barbell into its place on the secure hooks of the bench press. Slowly pushing herself upright, she cupped the curve of her swollen stomach and rubbed it fondly, her baby kicking and elbowing her below her skin in response to the rush of endorphin that had flooded her body during her workout.

The Drell chuckled deeply as he handed Shepard a crutch that had been balancing against the ball behind them, the sound of his deep throaty laugh resonating around the empty gym. "She needs her rest. Human women don't quite have the stamina that Drells do, Commander."

"Ohhh-kay then," Shepard pushed herself up off the bench press with her crutch, "I so did not need to know that." Taking the towel that Kolyat held out to her with a murmur of thanks, she draped it around her sweaty neck and utilized the crutch to balance herself as she stood up, resting her weight heavily on her carbon fiber limb. Taking a moment to steady herself as her muscles ached familiarly from her workout, she nodded to Kolyat as she began to walk forward, her gait slow but steady as her thick gym shoes echoed across the linoleum of the gymnasium. "Give me twenty minutes, we'll meet you out the front? Maybe grab my wheelchair too, I think I might need it."

Kolyat nodded and headed off in the direction of the men's change room.

Hannah walked cautiously beside her daughter as Shepard slowly shuffled to the female change room, bracing herself with the crutch she tucked under her right armpit for support. As she walked, Shepard continued to rest a hand unconsciously on her pronounced bump. Almost twenty-five weeks now, it was plainly obvious even to the most clueless that the Commander was more than halfway through her pregnancy as her taut stomach strained against the fabric of her Alliance-issue tank top and pants, her curves more pronounced as she began to put on a healthy amount of weight. Hannah felt a surge of pride as she eyed her daughter, ever the determined soldier and Commander embracing her new role as a mother, a vessel safely harboring a new growing life.

Reaching the female change rooms, Shepard lowered herself slowly onto the metal benches with an unconscious sigh of relief, slowly moving her legs onto the bench beside her. "I'm really not overworking myself, mom," she mentioned over her shoulder to Hannah as the latter fetched her daughter some clean towels from the change room cupboard. "I'm not going to push myself past my limits. I've put my baby in enough danger, I'm hardly going to put it in any more if I can help it."

"I'm just being your mother, Aurora," Hannah smiled, sitting on the bench next to Shepard as she slowly peeled off her tracksuit pants and underwear. "You'll understand in a few months time." Hannah would never admit it to Shepard, but the sight of her daughter wincing as she slowly and carefully removed her prosthetic from the remainder of her right leg brought a deep tightness and ache to her throat. She struggled to swallow as the ache brought up memories of Shepard when she was younger. Images flashed before her mind of a perfectly pink and plump infant, little rolls of fat and dimples in her elbows and knees, John and herself kissing and tickling her perfect little toes as she squealed with innocent laughter. Hannah shook her head a little to snap out of the images before the memories of her perfect baby girl brought her to the verge of tears.

Shepard pushed herself off of the metal bench and pivoted herself onto an empty shower commode, unlocking the brakes and wheeling herself into an empty shower cubicle. Hannah heard her sigh in relief as she pushed herself under the spray of hot water.

"How's the prosthetic going?" Hannah called over the sounds of water running into the drain, the steam quickly fogging up the moderately-sized change room.

"I'm getting there," Shepard replied over the shower curtain. "Can't stand or walk for too long without the crutch. My changing posture isn't making things easier. Doctor Michel is worried I will develop pelvic instability if I walk in the prosthetic for too long while I'm pregnant."

"I still think you should have accepted a limb regrowth, Aurora," Hannah said quietly, not intending for her daughter to hear her comment.

" _No_ , mom. I'm not going to say it again. There are more important things for those resources to be used for."

Hannah shrugged to no one in particular, unfolding clean clothes for Shepard from her bag. She waited patiently for Shepard to finish her shower, looking away politely as her daughter wheeled herself out of the cubicle and reached for the towels, her light green eyes focused on the light fixtures on the ceiling as she hummed. Noting that Shepard seemed to be taking her time toweling off and dressing, she dared look at her naked daughter for just a moment, ever conscious of her privacy.

"Are you tired? We can postpone your day leave if you want to go back to your room and rest."

"I'm okay, mom. I need to get out of the ward for a bit, trust me. You still need to tell me what's going on with my crew," Shepard replied, discarding the damp towel on the floor and slipping on her underclothes.

Becoming well acquainted with the lines and textures of the light fixtures as she waited, Hannah finally dared look at Shepard again when she heard her daughter cursing a little under her breath, turning her eyes to see the Commander struggling to zip her hooded jacket over her swollen stomach. She smiled warmly at the sight, reminiscent of her own struggles to fit into clothing when she was pregnant with Shepard. Handing Shepard a black cap which the Commander eagerly pulled low over her face to hide her features from any onlookers that might recognize her, Hannah slapped Shepard's shoulder fondly and pushed herself up from the bench.

"Let's get going. Time to feed my grandchild."

* * *

Shepard glared at Hannah across the table from her as she watched her mother crack open a bottle of beer expertly with her teeth, the pop of the cap as it broke off loud among the quiet atmosphere of the bar. Hannah had taken Shepard and Kolyat to a small bar just outside of the Alliance Headquarters, far enough to be considered off of official grounds, but close enough should she need to get Shepard back in an emergency. The trio sat at a table tucked away in the corner of the deserted bar, the only occupants in the early afternoon. Shepard's wheelchair and crutch were folded and tucked away in the corner behind them, out of sight.

"I hate you so much right now, mom," Shepard growled, turning the straw slowly in her glass of soda water.

Hannah stopped in the middle of raising the bottle of beer to her mouth again for a sip, a worried look crossing her features. "I'm sorry, Aurora, I didn't think?..."

"No, no, it's okay mom," Shepard sighed with a small smile. "Just messing with you." She turned to Kolyat. "Please don't tell me you're going to have a beer too?" she asked the Drell as he nibbled at his appetizer plate of deep-fried white bait, a slightly pained expression on her face.

"You know I don't drink, Commander," he replied simply, his voice throaty as he swallowed his food.

Hannah surveyed her daughter as she picked at her own plate, appearing to have little interest in her food. "Eat," she prompted her. "If you want to hear news about the _Normandy_ , take a few mouthfuls first."

Shepard immediately picked up a piece of garlic bread and began to nibble on the crust, an eager look on her face. "You spoke to Kaidan this morning?" she asked, barely hiding the look of excitement that spread across her features.

"The Major touched based with us this morning for a routine check-in. They're still on track, ETA to Earth in twelve days, give or take," Hannah replied, satisfied that her daughter was eating. Shepard nodded, appearing pleased.

"Did he seem okay? I'm worried about the toll that the stress of traveling so long by FTL is taking on him."

"He certainly looks a little worn, but that's nothing that returning back to you and the baby won't fix," Hannah smiled, sipping her beer. "You know he's still in the dark about your pregnancy and prosthetic, yeah? Are you sure you don't want me to at least mention your leg to him to prepare him?"

"You mean prepare him for the fact that he's returning home to a woman who isn't whole and who she used to be?" Shepard replied a little sadly. Kolyat looked up from his fish, slightly alarmed at her comment.

"I didn't mean it like that, Aurora," Hannah replied quickly.

"I know, I know," Shepard replied a little bitterly. "I'm just dreading his reaction when he sees I have a stump for a right leg now. But anyway. Please continue, mom."

"He reported that your crew have been nothing but accommodating and hospitable towards the Cerberus defectors, a credit to your leadership," Hannah continued. "You should be proud of them."

"I would expect nothing less," Shepard smiled at her mother, rubbing her bump absentmindedly as she chewed a mouthful of garlic bread. "I'm glad that things seem to be mostly peaceful on the ship. How are the scientists progressing with repairing EDI?" Shepard looked a little worried as she saw the change in her mother's features.

"Major Alenko says that the scientists probably won't be able to restore EDI to exactly as she once was," Hannah replied sadly, watching Shepard's face fall. As much as she did not want to dampen her daughter's spirits, Hannah was conscious that she could not keep her daughter in the dark regarding the progress of her ship and crew. She watched, disappointed in herself that she had not been a little more delicate as the Commander dropped her garlic bread onto her plate and took her head forlornly in her hands, her elbows resting on the table before them. Kolyat leaned forward and rested a hand on Shepard's shoulder in a comforting manner.

Hannah swallowed, reluctant to continue.

"Did he say why?" Shepard mumbled, her voice masked by her hands.

"They don't have the equipment they need to repair EDI's blue box. Without that exact blue box, everything that makes EDI who she is will be missing, apparently. Supposedly the scientists can restore her to a functional VI, but..."

"Fuck," Shepard whispered. "I was so sure that they would... Oh, EDI. She didn't deserve this."

"I'm going to ask something I probably shouldn't, Commander," Kolyat asked, somewhat delicately. "Despite it being the only reasonable choice that the Catalyst gave you, why did you choose to destroy the Reapers, if you knew it was going to kill EDI and the Geth?"

Hannah paused, her brows furrowed in slight annoyance at the Drell for being comfortable enough with Shepard to broach such a sensitive subject when she was clearly upset.

"It... wasn't a decision I made lightly," Shepard replied, removing her hands from her face and leaning back in her chair, her features overcast beneath the rim of her cap. "I just knew... it's the choice EDI would have wanted me to have taken. She was very similar to Ashley Williams in that regard, when it came to putting others before herself. She told me once that she would risk non-functionality if it meant saving Joker... I guess I just used that as justification for causing her death. The bigger picture and all. As for the Geth, I..." Shepard's voice trailed off as she looked down at her swollen belly, tears accumulating in the corners of her eyes.

Hannah pushed her plate of hot chips aside, reaching out her hand to rest atop of Shepard's. She gently gave the Commander's hand a gentle squeeze.

Shepard looked up in response to her mother's squeeze. "What equipment do they need, mom? Maybe when they get back to Earth, we can sort something out?" she asked, daring to be hopeful.

"Doubtful," Hannah replied sadly. "The lead scientist thinks that the only way to repair EDI is to use an intact fragment of Sovereign. Where they're going to find one, heaven knows. It sounded like they were going to restore her to a VI and leave it at that."

"Ahhh," Kolyat's throat rumbled as he sighed in understanding across the table.

"An intact... piece of Sovereign?" Shepard's face jerked upwards, her previously downcast features lighting up. "Are you serious? That's all they need?"

Hannah nodded. "That's what Major Alenko said. Makes sense, if EDI was supposedly created by combining Reaper tech with a VI, doesn't it?"

Shepard began to chuckle, the sound soft at first, but growing louder and louder as her laugh gained more momentum. "Something funny, Aurora?" Hannah asked her daughter in surprise, not expecting Shepard's sudden change in demeanor.

"Just a little," Shepard gasped a little between chuckles. "Kind of funny when I think about it. Here I almost died, stuck in a coma for almost two months, starting to even develop baby brain, and my memory seems to be serving me better than any of my crew at the moment. How did Liara even miss that little detail? Javik's proving more of a distraction than she wants to admit. All she needed to do was search my mission reports."

The Rear Admiral stared blankly back at the sight of her daughter in her increasingly elevated state, unsure of what exactly she was getting at.

"You tell Kaidan to tell Joker to pull his socks up and back into gear," Shepard told her mother as she rubbed her hands together gleefully. "Get out the wax and oil and start polishing EDI's body up and ready for her. I know _exactly_ where we can find an intact fragment of that blasted Sovereign. Screw lunch!" Shepard stood up forcefully, her chair propelling to the floor behind her. "Get that fish bait to go, Kolyat," she pointed to the Drell as he sadly looked down at his plate of half-eaten appetizers. "Mom, skull your beer. I need to talk to Hackett, asap."


	17. Chapter 17

"Admiral Hackett," Shepard greeted the her uncle's projected image on the holo terminal in her hospital room with a respectful salute. "You were a little hard to get a hold of this morning, I got the impression that something is going on?" She noted that Hackett was donned in a black suit, uncharacteristic of his rank and personal preferences. He looked a little less fierce without the usual Admiral cap perched upon his balding head, but his features appeared strained, as though he was preoccupied and stressed.

"Commander Shepard," Hackett replied, brushing a hand through the thinning hairs on the top of his head. "I'm not sure if you've seen the news reports yet-"

"Haven't had the time to be honest, sir," Shepard interrupted eagerly."Plus, I've never been one to follow them. I don't have the best track record with reporters."

"Of course," Hackett smiled wryly, remembering fondly of Shepard's media encounters in the past. Despite the lack of fist and knuckle that any other person with half of her patience would have swiftly delivered, her no-nonsense persona and attitude had always resulted in interviews on the Alliance News Network that were not only moral-boosting and motivating, but entertaining as well.

"Sir, my reason for calling..."

"Before you get to that Shepard, I need to inform you of something," Hackett put his hand up to silence the Commander. "It's high time I told you, you've been left in the dark long enough."

"I know that you're the newly-elected Human Councillor sir, if that's what you were getting at," Shepard replied, eager to continue the conversation.

"How did you-?"

Shepard shrugged. "It didn't take a genius to work out, sir. There were plenty of hints. Not to mention the "Udina" suit you're wearing at the moment. Anderson only wore suits like that when he was doing Council-related stuff."

"I hope you can understand why I took the position then, Shepard," Hackett replied carefully.

"Of course I can, sir. Humanity needs a new leader on the Council that we can trust. After everything that has happened and your part leading the fifth fleet during the final battle, it's only natural that you would be the obvious choice. I can't think of anyone else that would be more appropriate for the position- that is, of course, if you can hack-it." She chuckled to herself at her lame joke.

Hackett guffawed loudly. "It's been far too long since I last participated myself in any combat, so I don't think I'll be pining for action like Anderson did," he mused. "And with the current shortages in Alliance leaders, I will still officially be an Admiral. My presence will just be mostly aboard the Citadel now."

"You've made a wise decision, Admiral. Anderson would have been proud."

"I hope so. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier, Shepard."

"It's not a big deal, sir. _But_ if you're really feeling the guilts about keeping me in the dark, I know how you can make it up to me."

"Continue," Hackett folded his arms, his image flickering on the terminal before Shepard.

"One of my crew members is in need of my help, sir. I need to get to Task Force Aurora's laboratory on the Citadel as soon as possible."

"What, Doctor Bryson's lab?" Hackett asked. Shepard nodded eagerly in confirmation. "What on Earth for? You cannot be serious. You've only just started walking with your prosthetic." Noting that Shepard appeared un-waived by his rather obvious observation regarding her synthetic limb before him, he continued. "You know I care about you Shepard, which is why I'm going to tell you that you are barely fit enough yet to go gallivanting over the Citadel just yet."

"It's hardly going to be gallivanting," Shepard replied. "Miranda, Jack and Kolyat will come with me. I have my wheelchair if I get tired. There won't be any danger other than the norm on the Citadel, and we are more than capable of handling anything that comes up. I need to do this, Admiral. I owe it to EDI."

"You don't even know if the lab survived the Citadel occupation, let alone whatever it is that you're after in there."

"Oh, it will be there," Shepard reassured Hackett. "Bryson's lab was located in the South end of the Presidium, most of which survived the Reaper invasion and the Crucible firing, by your very own reports. C-Sec is back in force along the Presidium and the risk of any danger is obviously low, given that the rest of the Council are residing there and it's in close proximity to the Citadel Tower."

"Doesn't matter, Shepard. Whatever it is that you need from the laboratory, Lawson, Nought or Krios can retrieve whatever it for you. You have limitations now with your pregnancy that you have to accept."

Shepard shook her head. "That won't do at all. I _need_ to do this. Being pregnant is not a hindrance. I was pregnant during the final battle against the Reapers, and that didn't stop me. This small trip will be child's play in comparison. Call it my closure and redemption for something I have had to grapple with since I fired the Crucible, if you will."

Hackett's face remained steadfast in his refusal as he continued to shake his head. "You know as well as I do that had we been aware of your pregnancy, you would not have been allowed anywhere _near_ the combat, Shepard."

"And we'd probably all be dead. Just like EDI will stay if I don't go and secure this piece. With or without your permission, I am going, Admiral," Shepard continued defiantly. "I would just rather it be _with_ your permission. I don't particularly like the thought of being court-martialed when I get back."

* * *

"How on Earth did you manage to convince Hackett to let you go on this excursion, Shepard?" Miranda asked as she clicked a thermal clip into place on her M-6 Carnifex pistol and settled it on the belt at her hip.

"Coz she's a hardcore bitch, that's why," Jack winked at Shepard admirably as she eyed the Commander slowly pulling herself into the doorway of the awaiting shuttle, politely refusing the help of the marine who reached forward to offer assistance. Kolyat followed behind her with her wheelchair, pushing the folded apparatus onto the shuttle and hoisting himself up behind Shepard swiftly.

"Guilted him, mostly," Shepard puffed as she hobbled to one of the seats in the corner of the shuttle, sitting down as carefully as she could while she balanced her crutch in one hand and cupped her stomach with her other. "Threatened to go anyway, with or without his permission. Don't think he wanted to order the Savior of the Galaxy court-martialed on her return."

"Are you sure you're up to this, Shepard?" Miranda asked cautiously as she sat down opposite of the Commander, Jack and Kolyat watching on as they hung onto the ceiling railings of the shuttle. Everyone pitched forward slightly as the shuttle door closed and the vehicle took to the air, the sound of the engines humming as it began to gain altitude on its path to the Citadel in the void surrounding Earth.

"I know my limits, Miranda," Shepard replied. "And I've got you guys with me. It's not like we're going into combat or anything. We're just picking up a Reaper fragment from the Citadel."

" _Just picking up a Reaper fragment from the Citadel_ ," Miranda repeated slowly, leaning backwards against the back of her seat. "Only you could say that and make it sound like we're just going to a ward food court for noodles, Shepard."

The group fell into a comfortable silence inside the confines of the shuttle, punctured only by the pilot and intercom in the cockpit as he relayed their location and coordinates to both Alliance Command security and C-Sec on the Citadel. With her heart beginning to flutter within her chest, Shepard was starting to feel familiar surges of adrenaline as her body trembled with the slight turbulence of the shuttle making its way through the Earth's atmosphere, reminiscent of the numerous missions she had been ferried to on the _Normandy_ 's shuttle. It felt odd and unnatural to not to be wearing heavy ceramic armor, a rifle at the ready in her hands and Kaidan faithfully by her side as one of her squad members. In her current state, she figured it would not be ideal for her to tackle the weight of protective armor, particularly as companies hadn't foreseen the need to cater for the needs of pregnant soldiers. In terms of protection, Shepard would have to make do with a kinetic barrier emitted from a small device she had fastened safely to the belt of her stretched fatigues, with Doctor Michel's reassurances that the mass effect field generated by the emitter would not harm her unborn baby.

It brought hope to the Commander that the redemption she so desperately needed in quickly sentencing EDI to death could be found in ensuring that she herself personally escorted the intact fragment of Sovereign that she knew was located in Doctor Bryson's laboratory back to Alliance headquarters for safe-keeping. Whilst Shepard knew that she would never forgive herself for causing the death of a beloved friend and crew member despite the greater good for the rest of the Galaxy, knowing that she was proactively ensuring that the last chance of reviving EDI was harbored safely to await the _Normandy_ 's return to Earth helped ebb her guilt somewhat.

As the baby kicked and wiggled to and fro in response to the slight shaking of the shuttle, Shepard closed her eyes and focused on the feel of Kaidan and her child beneath her skin. Despite her nocturnal yearnings for Kaidan as she was left alone at night with her demons, without the bustle of physical therapy to keep her mind and body busy, the last three and a half months had positively flown by. Shepard held onto the hope that when Kaidan was finally back at her side where he belonged, the ghosts of those that had been lost that haunted her dreams at night, her continuing phantom limb pain and secretly harbored fears about parenthood would abate once he held her again against his broad chest with his muscular, tanned arms.

Shepard dreaded the thought of Kaidan's reaction once he finally saw her amputated leg, her body disfigured, maimed and no longer whole as she once was. These fears were only outweighed by her dreams of Kaidan's delight when Shepard could finally tell him in person of the result of their passionate nights during their Citadel shore leave, the forming life beneath her skin that he had wanted so badly for them when the Reapers were finally defeated. This baby, she knew, signaled a new beginning for them together, a future free from any threat.

The four-hour shuttle flight to the Citadel passed in a slight daze for the Commander as she nodded off in her seat, her head resting on the solid metal wall behind her as she ignored the frequent urges to go to the bathroom. The shuttle soared through the empty expanse of space as it inched closer and closer to the looming remains of the Citadel, the station's exterior abuzz with activity as the remaining races and occupants determinedly worked to restore the capital of the Milky Way Galaxy to its formal glory.

Jostled awake by inertia dampeners not fully negating the force of the shuttle as it landed in the C-Sec shuttle bay, Shepard opened her eyes to see the doors of the vehicle opening, her companions checking their holdout weapons for a final time before congregating at the door to disembark. Shepard reached for her crutch and pushed herself up heavily from her seat, feeling a small elbow poke outwards painfully beneath her skin. She hobbled forward to step off the shuttle behind Kolyat and Miranda, rubbing her belly to coax the baby to move into a more comfortable position, the triangular outline of its elbow reluctant to budge beneath her ministrations. The group were met with the sight of a familiar-looking C-Sec officer bearing the stripes of Commander ranking on the sleeves of his uniform, a wide smile plastered over his wrinkled features.

"Ah, Commander Shepard," Bailey saluted respectfully before moving to clap hands together with Kolyat in greeting, the comrades patting each other on the back fondly. "I am pleased to see you all." He turned his attention to the Commander as Kolyat moved back to the shuttle to remove Shepard's wheelchair. "So well recovered since I saw you last. And, urrr..." his eyes trailed to the lines of her stretched outfit. "Just glowing, I think the word is, Commander."

Shepard smiled as she leaned heavily on her crutch and extended a hand for him to shake. He grasped her palm tightly in his hand and pumped her arm up and down. "It's good to see you too, Bailey."

Bailey waved them to follow him as he set off down the metal pathway of the C-Sec shuttle bay, Kolyat following behind the group as he wheeled Shepard's wheelchair. Never one to waste time or mince words, Bailey led them slowly to a skycar parked in the north-east end of the bay, conscious of allowing time for Shepard to keep up with the group as she walked carefully. "Hackett has already filled me in," Bailey spoke in his gruff voice. "We've organized suitable transport for you, have a number of C-Sec shuttles patrolling the area if need be, ready to come to your aid should you require it. All for a Reaper fragment, hey? I was pretty certain we had purged the Station of most of that stuff."

"Not just any Reaper fragment," Shepard replied eagerly. "This is going to be the missing piece that we can use to bring back EDI."

The group came to a halt. "What the fuck is this? A party bus?" Jack's expression appeared disgusted as she surveyed the large skycar awaiting them, a seven-seater with ample hatchback space in its boot.

"How else are we meant to ferry a Reaper fragment out of the Presidium?" Shepard pointed out as she caught up with the biotic behind her, her crutch clicking on the metal floor of the shuttle bay's parking lot. "Strap it to the skycar roof? Freak out all the civilians as we ferry it through the Presidium on a trailer with a C-Sec escort? Do you want to be shot down by a random who thinks we're the Reapers coming again?"

"Oh. Yeah. Well. Let me be the one to test if this turtle can fly then, hey?" Jack rubbed her hands together, before motioning towards the driver's side of the vehicle.

"Jack, you are _not_ driving the skycar," Miranda insisted, rushing forward to get to the driver's seat before the other biotic did.

"I call shotgun," Shepard smiled as she shuffled to the front passenger seat, the two women's voices raising as they bickered over who would pilot the skycar.

A bright green sticker plastered across the dashboard of the interior caught Shepard's eye as she carefully lowered herself onto the seat and tucked her crutch on top of the center console between the driver and front passenger. _Politicians are the weeds of the Galaxy_. Shepard raised an eyebrow.

"Don't crash this car, bouncy boobs," Jack muttered threateningly from the back seat of the skycar as she and Kolyat settled into the soft-leather seats, Miranda positioning her long legs into the driver's before her. "Or I will come back and haunt you from the grave."

As Miranda's fingers flew across the skycar's console and the open doors slowly closed to seal in the passengers, the vehicle hummed with energy as it slowly rose into the air before the observing C-Sec Commander. Raising an arm to motion the group on their way, Bailey moved away from the gusts of air that the skycar's engines generated and walked away from the parking spot, the glow of his omni-tool flickering to life as he opened a channel to Earth's Alliance Security to update them on Shepard's progress. The vehicle skimmed through the air out of the large metal doors of the C-Sec shuttle bay before emerging into the vast and expansive atmosphere of the semi-repaired Presidium, the sight of the Citadel's bustling heart a welcome sight to the skycar's occupants.

Despite bearing a significant brunt of Reaper forces and carnage during the occupation of the Citadel, the remaining occupants of the station had made good progress in the months since the end of the war with the lush park lands, extensive lake and fields of grass and trees seemingly untouched by death or destruction. Gentle fresh breezes and simulated sunlight basked the skycar in a warm glow as Miranda locked the vehicle's course into autopilot, their destination of Bryson's laboratory marked on the terminal before them on the dashboard.

Shepard leaned back against the soft leather of the seat and stretched outwards as far as her limbs would allow her, the baby hiccuping beneath her skin. Smiling, she beckoned the former Cerberus Operative beside her to place her hand on her stomach, Miranda's steel-like face softening as she felt the little spasms of Shepard's baby beneath her hands.

"Oh, what I wouldn't give to experience this," Miranda breathed.

"It's thanks to you that I do," Shepard replied softly, her voice laced with gratitude. Miranda smiled and moved her hand away to place it back at the skycar terminal, an awed expression on her face.

"I can never get enough of feeling that baby move," Miranda sighed sadly.

The four occupants of the skycar continued in silence as the vehicle flew through the air in autopilot, surpassing a number of other vehicles and yielding the group astounding views of the rebuilding and cleaning up of the Presidium. Jack whistled occasionally at the sights as they passed, having not traveled through the heart of the Citadel before.

"There's a skycar following us," Shepard heard Kolyat observe behind her softly, his black eyes transfixed out of the vehicle's back window. "Driver doesn't really seem to know what he's doing, he's been attempting to follow us for the past five minutes..."

Turning in alarm, Shepard caught a glimpse of a skycar trailing behind them, its movements haphazard as the driver appeared to struggle to maintain a course behind them. As the group all turned to focus their attention out of the back window, Shepard caught a glimpse of a large and looming figure clad in what appeared to be heavy red armor, hunchbacked in its attempt to comfortably fit its entirety into the small confines of the vehicle. The skycar suddenly shot past them as the driver inside appeared to have unexpectedly pushed the boost button, the trail of nitrous oxide billowing out of the skycar's bonnet as it zoomed forward and promptly crashed into the garden bed of Bryson's laboratory before them.

Miranda swiftly turned off the skycar's autopilot and brought it to a standstill as it hovered atop of the overgrown expanse of the garden, Shepard peering out of the windows below her as she struggled to see who had been driving the car. Watching the familiar outline of a large Krogan with pronounced scars across his head plate push open the skycar's door and heave himself out onto the grass before him, she shook her head fondly.

"Oh Wrex, you and your entrances," she mused. "Park us down next to him, Miranda. It's just Wrex."

As the larger skycar slowly settled onto the overgrown grass beside Wrex's slightly damaged one, Shepard eagerly pushed her door open and dug her crutch into the soft soil, pushing herself up heavily off of her seat and taking a moment to steady herself as she clutched onto the rim of the passenger side doorway. A grin stretched across her features as the Krogan looked up and caught sight of her, his features mirroring hers in delight.

"Wrex! What are you doing here!"

"Sheparrrrrrd," the Krogan leader growled fondly, moving forward and taking Shepard into his heavily armored hands with a hug. Shepard gasped a little at his strength as her swollen belly bumped into his, her baby protesting with a sharp prod at the invasion of its personal space. Squeezing her tightly, Wrex grasped Shepard's shoulders and pushed her back so that he could see her face. "Shepard, Shepard, Shepard. Aren't you a sight for sore eyes," he greeted her warmly, his hot and slightly fragrant breath fanning her face. "Only you could have survived what you went through, and pregnant to boot. I'd say you and Kaidan were celebrating the end of the Krogan Genophage a little too much too, ammiright?" Wrex chuckled at his own joke, Shepard looking slightly embarrassed. "Pregnancy suits you, Shepard. Congratulations. I'm sorry to hear about your leg though. Not that that was ever going to hinder you."

"What _are_ you doing here?" Miranda asked Wrex surprisingly, repeating Shepard's question as the Commander grinned up at the Krogan, elated to see him.

"Besides the usual butting heads with the Council? Admiral Hackett contacted me this morning and asked me to tag along, make sure you pyjacks didn't crash into the Presidium lakes or something," Wrex puffed out his chest proudly.

"Oh, the irony," Jack muttered behind him sarcastically. Kolyat coughed and spluttered a little, disguising what sounded suspiciously like a laugh. Wrex eyed him with a stern gaze before turning back to the Commander.

"So, we're off to retrieve a chunk of Sovereign I hear," the Krogran kicked at a number of roughly-made fishing rods placed on the concrete wall bordering the garden from the Presidium lake, scattering the wooden rods across the overgrown grass. "Sounds just like old times. What exactly are we going to do with this chunk? Space it? Race it? Sell it on the black market for Krogan testicles? Fill me in, Shepard."

"Retrieving it so that the Cerberus defectors who the _Normandy_ picked up on the way home can revive EDI," Shepard replied, slowly limping behind Wrex on her crutch as he led the way to the glass doors of Bryson's laboratory. The building appeared to not have access to any power, being quite a way away from the main populated areas of the Presidium. The Krogan expertly kicked down the doors, unfazed by the shattering of glass, and moved aside the remaining frame to make way for the Commander and her group to follow in behind him.

Crossing the threshold of broken glass, Shepard was met with the sight of the damp and dark remains of Doctor Bryson's laboratory, the stale air inside musky and thick with dust. It was a far cry from the bright lights and activity that had greeted her during her previous visit to the lab. Judging by an array of makeshift bedding in the corner beside the doors leading to the secondary area of the Task Force Aurora headquarters, it had appeared that some refugees had made camp in the undamaged laboratory before moving on to another area. Litter lay scattered across the floor, the drawers and desks ransacked, the room removed of any equipment or salvage that could be used or traded for supplies.

Eager to get to the piece of Sovereign, Shepard motioned Wrex before her, the Krogan looking gleefully in his element as he again kicked at the glass doors separating the two sections of the building where the Commander remembered that the fragment was housed. Hustling into the second area as fast as her aching legs could take her, Shepard let out a big sigh of relief as the outline of Bryson's Reaper souvenir loomed before her, held safely upright by the same frame that Shepard recognized from her last visit. It appeared relatively untouched, despite the obvious signs of recent occupancy around the building.

"So, who's ready to be indoctrinated?" Jack asked brightly, catching up with the group. Shepard, Wrex, Miranda and Kolyat turned to glare at her. "What, did nobody actually consider that?"

"The chances of this fragment indoctrinating us is next to none," Miranda replied in an annoyed tone. "Reapers destroyed and all, remember? Considering there were no signs of anyone getting indoctrinated during the clean-up of Reaper debris, I think it's safe to say that whatever space-magic they used to do that is completely redundant. The Crucible did its job well."

"I'll put my fist through it if it so much as glows," Wrex drawled, surveying the piece with a look of disgust on his scarred face.

"Please, tell me it's intact," Shepard breathed softly.

Miranda raised her wrist as her omni-tool flickered to life, waving the holo interface before the dark fragment of Sovereign. "Completely intact," she confirmed with a nod. "No energy signatures whatsoever, completely redundant. It's good to go, I'd say."

"It's a lot bigger than I remembered," Shepard replied with a sigh of relief, looking the fragment up and down. "We probably should have brought a bigger skycar. Wrex, if you and Kolyat could remove the fragment safely from its frame, please," Shepard directed. "I'm going to have a quick look around before we leave. Being here is making me feel a little... nervous."

Tucking her crutch tightly under her right arm, Shepard turned on her prosthetic heel and slowly moved her way back to the first area of Bryson's laboratory, noting sadly the degree that the building had been upturned, the bones of the plesiosaur that had previously been suspended from the ceiling laying scattered over the floor. The reflections of light from Miranda and Jack's activated omni-tools caught on the fragments of glass covering the floor in the corner of the lab next to what remained of the stripped galaxy map. Intrigued, Shepard slowly limped over to investigate.

The transparent case that had spanned the wall beside the galaxy map lay in pieces on the cold floor, the glass fragments sharp and digging into the Commander's heels as she found herself looking upwards into the relatively empty cabinet, save for the forlorn-looking remains of a Prothean artifact and sculpture of a Krogan head to the far left. A pedestal that had previously housed a Leviathan artifact stood empty before her, the bulk of the glass fragments in a mound at the bottom of the pedestals' feet. Lying discarded on the floor to the right of the Commander lay a small metal stool, the object she immediately suspected would have been used to break apart the glass to get into the contents of the case. She bent forward as far as her growing stomach would allow in order to investigate more closely, wobbling slightly as she tried to compensate her balance.

Behind her in the next area of the laboratory, Shepard could hear the screeching of metal as Wrex and Kolyat attempted to pull apart the contraption holding up the piece of Sovereign, the Krogan and Drell muttering among themselves as they tackled their task. She caught the faint blue sheen of biotics out of the corner of her eye as the males resorted to their abilities to help them move the large fragment out of its bindings, the sensation of nearby mass effect fields in her immediate surroundings causing the implant on the back of her neck to tickle familiarly.

"Do we know if the original Leviathan artifact remained here shielded, or was moved by the Alliance when they joined the fight?" Shepard called over her shoulder to Miranda, her green eyes narrowed as she looked over the rest of the transparent case.

"You're asking the wrong person, Shepard," Miranda replied. "Ex-Cerberus here, remember?"

"Hrmmm," Shepard muttered, her lips pursed together. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but tendrils of suspicion began to poke at the back of her mind.

"As far as I knew, Alliance was keeping the artifact here, shielded except when they needed to directly communicate with the Leviathans," Jack popped up at Shepard's shoulder. "My kids and I had to ferry a number of artifacts to the front lines so that the cuttlefish could take control of Reaper troops and turn the tide of the battle. That was my understanding of it, anyway. Chances are this one was taken to be destroyed in the sun after the battle was over, like the others. By an overly-eager marine," she added, noting the broken glass that littered the floor beneath her feet. There was a loud crash behind them as Wrex and Kolyat appeared to have finally relieved the fragment of Sovereign from the frame that supported it. "Hey! Wait for me, I wanna see this!" The biotic scooted off in the other direction, leaving Shepard scrutinizing the surroundings of the pedestal for any hints as to what happened to the artifact.

"I don't like the look of this," Shepard murmured under her breath. Beneath her protectively-placed hand, her baby poked her in agreement. "Remind me to ask Hackett what happened to the Leviathan artifact, little one. Here's hoping it was destroyed with the others after the war ended."

* * *

Shepard limped tiredly out of the dark confines of Doctor Bryson's laboratory, eager to return to the welcoming soft seat of the skycar. The Commander was presented with the sight of Jack and Wrex trying to wrestle the intact Reaper fragment into the boot of the said vehicle, dull sounds echoing as the corners of the large piece made contact with the metal hull of the vehicle. Behind them, Kolyat watched the spectacle, appearing amused.

"Push, quad balls, push!" Jack growled at the Krogan, her hands cupping the bottom end of the fragment as she heaved and pushed forward.

Wrex cracked his knuckles ominously, his hands not even touching the fragment. "Step aside, you scrawny pyjack. Let Uncle Urdnot show you how to dismantle a Reaper properly."

"Guys, careful with that, please. EDI needs an _intact_ piece of Sovereign," Shepard interrupted, leaning heavily on her crutch, her eyelids beginning to burn as her fatigue caught up with her.

"But- it- won't- fit!" Jack continued through clenched teeth, attempting another shove.

"Then push the back seats down in the skycar to make more room," Shepard pointed out obviously. "We have two cars now. You and Miranda can just ride with Wrex in his one back to C-Sec."

"Assuming it can even fly anymore," Jack replied sarcastically as she moved around the skycar to clamber into the back in order to move the seats down. "I don't particularly want to place my life into the hands of a Krogan who clearly can't even tell up from down, Shepard." The biotic was silenced with a quick look from the Commander through the open hatch of the vehicle. "Ai ai, Shep," she mockingly saluted with one hand, pushing the back seats of the vehicle down with a loud thud. With a swift push, Wrex hoisted the Reaper fragment to settle fully into the hatchback of the skycar and closed the door with a satisfying sound, wiping the dust off of his hands.

Nodding at the job well done, Shepard looked over her shoulder to see Miranda strolling coolly out of the dark building that remained of Bryson's laboratory. She watched as the former Cerberus Operative screwed up her perfectly shaped nose at the sight of Kolyat getting into the driver's seat of their original skycar, the passenger seat beside left vacant for Shepard. "Just remember if I die today Shepard, I can't bring you back from the brink of death again a third time," she muttered, crossing the overgrown grass to the empty seat in Wrex's waiting vehicle.

Shepard chuckled heartily, a warm sensation flooding her chest as she surveyed the Krogan, Drell and two human women, a small fraction of her beloved squad members.

"Maybe it's just me, but I'm kind of disappointed in how anti-climatic this little expedition was," Shepard smiled, settling into the empty seat of the skycar housing the fragment of Sovereign. "Nobody had to even take out their gun."

"Just go swap places with Wrex in the other skycar if you want some action, Commander" Kolyat replied, firing the skycar into life. "Miss Lawson, Miss Nought and Urdnot Wrex together in the confines of one vehicle? Lucky we've got what we were looking for, I don't anticipate that skycar making it back to C-Sec in one piece, if at all."


	18. Chapter 18

"Alliance Command, this is the _SSV Normandy_ , requesting permission to land," Joker's voice trembled slightly as he opened up a direct communication to Earth.

Garrus clapped a taloned hand on Kaidan's shoulder in what the Major assumed was a reassuring manner as they both stood behind the pilot's chair. It was hard to tell when the Turian's talons dug sharply into the thick material his fatigues. "This is it, Kaidan," Garrus murmured. "You've finally made it back to Shepard." Kaidan grinned back at the Turian, his features emotional in his excitement.

There was a buzz on the comm as an officer on the other end reopened the channel. " _SSV Normandy, this is Alliance Command. Requesting docking clearance codes."_

To Joker's left, the AI terminal flickered to life as a blue holographic sphere appeared beside them.

" _Docking clearance code alpha-zulu-six-five-nine-two-delta..._ " the virtual intelligence version of EDI automatically replied. The familiar sound of EDI's voice, clearly lacking enthusiasm or any personality, echoed around the bridge as Kaidan, Joker and Garrus waited patiently. It still unnerved everyone slightly that their beloved AI and friend had become so impersonal to everything.

Joker's hand moved sideways from the pilot's console in a gentle gesture, as if to lovingly stroke the holographic sphere.

" _Docking clearance granted_ ," the Alliance officer replied warmly. _"We have a small team of shuttles on standby to guide and escort you on the flight down to our Vancouver headquarters. Welcome back to Earth, Normandy._ "

* * *

"Aurora?"

Hannah Shepard stood in the doorway of Shepard's room in the Anderson Rehabilitation Wing, watching the sight of her daughter before her sitting on her bed, her posture hunched. Shepard's hands rested atop of her swollen belly, her eyes downcast as she appeared to be murmuring to her baby beneath her skin, almost as if seeking comfort. She barely looked over her shoulder at her mother waiting behind her.

"Aurora, the _Normandy_ has begun its descent back into Alliance airspace. It's time for us to go meet them."

Shepard closed her eyes and took a deep, shuddering breath, her heart fluttering wildly within her chest. Dread wracked her mind as she pictured Kaidan's face when he saw her for the first time in months. She pictured his face falling before turning to a look of disgust as he caught a glimpse of her right stump supported by her prosthetic, the sad remainder of the long and lean leg he would grasp and kiss during their lovemaking. Second guessing herself, the Commander wondered about how he would react to being kept in the dark for so long about his impending fatherhood also. Hearing the news from anyone else other than her seemed inappropriate and disconnecting, somehow. Now, as the impending reunion with the father of her baby loomed, she kicked herself at her selfishness for not telling him sooner. Shepard took her face in her hands and tried to concentrate on her breathing as she began to feel her anxiety consume her body, her prosthetic limb clicking against the wooden panel at the bottom of her bed as her limbs shook involuntarily.

Hannah crossed the room and knelt before her daughter, taking Shepard's face and hands in her own lovingly. The sight of her daughter's recently-developed anxiety tugged at her heartstrings. "Deep breaths my girl. Deep, deep breaths," she crooned. Shepard looked deep into her mother's warm eyes, her mouth agape as she slowly inhaled, trying to calm herself. "Let's go in the wheelchair today, hey? You look far too nervous to walk."

* * *

Kaidan stood at the apex of the _Normandy_ 's Combat Information Centre, his muscular frame aglow with the light of the Galaxy Map flickering before him. He cleared his throat loudly, slightly more nervous than usual. Nodding to Specialist Traynor at right his side to open the ship's intercom, he received a thumbs up from her along with a bright smile. Suddenly unable to recall the speech he had rehearsed over and over in his head for the climatic moment of the _Normandy_ 's return to Earth, Kaidan gulped, unsure of where to start.

"This is Major Alenko speaking," Kaidan began, his voice sounding somewhat high-pitched over the intercom. He gripped the railings of the Galaxy Map harder beneath his hands, his thoughts racing.

"This slow journey home has been grueling, to say the least," the Major continued slowly. "Physically, mentally, emotionally. We all return back to Earth bearing fresh scars, nightmares to remind us every day of the things that we have seen and experienced." He paused for a moment, unsure of what to say next. "Each and every one of you have surpassed the call of duty as we rallied together at the beginning of this war, and each of you had a specific part to play in securing the Galaxy's victory against the Reapers and getting us home safely."

The CIC was silent as all of its occupants watched the Major eagerly at his place before the Galaxy Map, pausing in their duties during the final descent to Earth as they listened to his words.

"The Reapers thought that they could defeat us. We showed them. And we will continue to show them once we land and join the rest of mankind to work towards rebuilding our future, and a future for our families and children." Kaidan felt his confidence building as he winged his sppech, reflecting back on the many motivational ones he had witnessed Shepard deliver when crew moral was low.

"On behalf of Commander Shepard, myself and Earth's Systems Alliance, I would like to thank all of you for putting every fibre of your being into the fight for our future so that we could emerge triumphant. I commend all of you for giving up so much to have joined us in this war to end all wars. Serving with each and every one of you all has been an absolute honour and privilege."

"I will leave the rest for Commander Shepard to say herself once we have arrived back on Earth and have taken time to rest and recover from our journey home. I look forward to seeing you all again in two weeks at the reunion party. Prepare the _Normandy_ for landing," Kaidan finished his speech with a flourish, immensely pleased with himself.

Behind Kaidan where Shepard's squad members had gathered, there was a positive murmur among themselves at Kaidan's choice of words. "ETA to Vancouver, ten minutes," Joker announced over the intercom from the bridge, barely able to contain the excitement in his voice. "And so, with those touching words from our Executive Officer, courtesy of your very own DJ Jeff Moreau, let us travel these last few minutes back to Earth in true _Normandy_ style to twenty-first century tunes. This was all I was able to access while we've been snailing across deep space. Hit it, EDI!"

"That feature is not in my programming, Mister Moreau," EDI's voice replied bluntly. The sound of Joker sighing over the open intercom was drowned out by the drum roll of an old-school song, the sound of rock assaulting everyone's ears.

The crew members around the CIC returned to their posts as the upbeat music blasted throughout the halls of the _Normandy_ , a distinct buzz of excitement in the air. "Not quite as epic as Shepard's speeches, but still pretty damn good, Kaidan," Garrus smiled reassuringly as Kaidan stepped down from the Galaxy Map. The Major rubbed his hands together in glee, surveying the group of squad members before him.

"We've made it, guys," Kaidan grinned gleefully, holding his arms out for a group hug. He gasped a little as Tali was the first one to go flying into his outstretched arms, her crowing voice slightly muffled beneath the mask of her environmental suit. "We've finally made it!"

* * *

Around Shepard and her mother mingled a number of people. Some looked remotely familiar, sharing recognizable features with some of her crew members. Others didn't. Shepard could only gather that they were the few surviving family members of the _Normandy_ crew that the Alliance had managed to locate to inform of the ship's return to Earth.

On the North-East side of the docking bay gathered a group of media reporters, kept firmly in place behind their barriers by a row of Alliance marines. The loud chatter of the reporters in front of their flycams during their live broadcast of the _Normandy_ 's return threatened to send Shepard's anxiety spiraling again, the flashing lights of their equipment making her head ache slightly. She grasped her mother's spare dress blue jacket closer over her lap to cover her swollen stomach, conscious of keeping her pregnancy away from the eyes of the Galaxy's media, despite being well out of sight of the cameras.

"Hackett couldn't make it, hey?" Shepard muttered to her mother over her shoulder as the Rear Admiral stood dutifully behind her daughter, her hands gripped tightly on the handles of the wheelchair.

Hannah shook her head. "He couldn't get away from the Council, despite the notice. That's why I'm here. Will you be alright parked here while I meet the crew at the top of the gangway when the old girl docks? Your wheels won't make it up there, I'm afraid."

"I'll be fine, mom."

There were a number of excited squeals as the attention of the family members congregated in the Alliance docking bay turned up at the gigantic round ceiling, the two halves of its heavy metal roof opening slowly to reveal the bright blue Vancouver sky. Hannah's fingers flew to her personal comm as it clicked in her ear. She nodded as she listened to the voice speaking to her over the comm. "ETA, two minutes," she relayed back to Shepard, who looked up at her curiously.

Shepard's heart skipped a beat as it positively pounded in her chest, her baby elbowing her hard in response. She rubbed her hand soothingly across her stretched skin and inhaled deeply, peering out of the open ceiling as she tried to will her ship to suddenly appear in the air before them. To her left, two men clad in the dress blues of Rear Admirals joined her and her mother, saluting them both respectfully. Shepard's hand automatically moved to her forehead in response as she saluted back, the sounds of her mother talking to her colleagues falling deaf on her ears as her blood pounded in her eardrums.

The clear sky basking the bay with sunlight was suddenly punctured with the sight of numerous shuttles whizzing past the open ceiling, the sounds of thrusters and engines of the Alliance personal carriers coupled with a deep familiar sound assaulting Shepard's ears. She squinted upwards to see the looming metal hull of her ship. Amid the excited squeals of the people around her, the _Normandy_ 's tennis court-sized thrusters kicked up a wind in the docking bay, the black locks growing on Shepard's head whipping about her head and ears. Hannah, holding firmly onto her dress hat in an attempt to stop it from flying away, smiled down at her daughter as Shepard watched her ship hover momentarily, tears welling in the corners of her vivid green eyes.

The looming metal mass of the _Normandy_ slowly levitated downwards through the vast open roof of the docking bay, the spectators shielding their eyes against the bright lights and fumes of the thrusters. Shepard was shocked to see the state of her beloved ship, its hull patched somewhat disjointedly, burned metal and scratched paint decking the previously unmarked and pristine exterior. The _Normandy_ spluttered and hissed as the docking bay clamps folded outwards to secure her hull, suspending the frigate in the air. From their sectioned corner of the docking bay, there were flashes of light and excited commotion as the news reporters flurried to capture and broadcast the _Normandy_ 's arrival back to Earth, the ship's body masking Shepard and the families from the view of their cameras.

Hannah patted Shepard's shoulder reassuringly before motioning her colleagues to follow her behind the gangway that slowly rolled across the cement floors of the docking bay. The tarpaulin-covered staircase moved to meet and seal with the _Normandy_ 's main airlock as the ship remained suspended by the docking clamps, her thrusters and engines beginning to power down.

Shepard inched her wheelchair forward to rest in front of the crews' surviving family as they watched, the men and women at the front of the group moving aside respectfully. Her hands flurried protectively over her covered stomach as the implant in the back of her neck tingled familiarly in reaction to the _Normandy_ 's eezo core.

"Finally home," Shepard whispered, drinking in the sight of her ship.

* * *

The _Normandy_ 's doors seemed to take a lifetime to open as Joker began to power down the ship, safely suspended in the Alliance docking bay. Kaidan could barely contain himself as he waited in the decontamination area of the airlock, the crew members beginning to mingle behind him as they left their stations to await exiting the ship. Behind him, Vega held onto the excited hands of Nicholas and Allister Frantelle, the young boys eager to be one of the first to disembark.

As the Normandy's doors opened to a view of the connected gangway, Kaidan was met with the sight of Rear Admiral Hannah Shepard waiting for him, a number of other officials he didn't recognize donned in dress blues behind her. "A very _big_ welcome back to Earth, Major Alenko," Hannah greeted warmly as she saluted the Major, before stepping forward and extending a hand to shake with his. "On behalf of the Systems Alliance, I would like to commend you and your crew for an excellent job well done." The two other Rear Admirals behind Hannah saluted respectfully before extending their own hands.

There were formal salutes and shakes all round before the Major turned back to Hannah.

"I do not mean to be rude, but Shepard?" Kaidan asked eagerly.

Hannah smiled, pointing in the direction of the bottom of the gangway. "She's waiting for you down there, Major Alenko."

Kaidan positively flew as he took the steps of the gangway two at a time, eager to step out of its tarpaulin cover that shielded his sight from the surrounds of the docking bay. Slightly breathless as he reached the bottom of the stairs, his eyes quickly frisked his surroundings before resting on a small group of people separated far away from the media congregated at one of the ends of the docking bay, sectioned off by a number of marines. At the forefront of the group who were all smiling and waving at the _Normandy_ , his brown eyes rested on the thin frame of a woman sitting in a wheelchair. Kaidan's heart began to palpitate in his chest as he took in the familiar but slightly different features of the Commander he knew so well. His face broke out into an ecstatic grin as he started to run across the docking bay, away from the gangway where the other _Normandy_ crew members were beginning to disembark after being greeted by the Rear Admirals.

As Kaidan feet flew across the concrete, he drank in the sight of Shepard as she came closer and closer into view. His body felt on fire as he propelled himself across the docking bay, despite to bury her in his arms. Every feature, every curve of the woman he remembered so well. He had spent the seemingly endless nights aboard the _Normandy_ as the old girl limped the crew home, envisioning every freckle and every line, every perfectly placed feature, dreaming about burying his face into her hair and drinking in her scent. As she inched closer into view, Shepard's black hair was so much shorter than he remembered. Her pale face bore newly healed scars. Her previously muscular yet lean and feminine body looked a lot smaller and fragile than he remembered, encased in a simple tightly hugging Alliance-issue shirt and pants.

Watching Kaidan hurry across the concrete of the docking bay towards her, Shepard saw the other members of her crew out of the corner of her eye slowly gathering at the bottom of the gangway, as if hanging back respectfully to watch the scene before them unfold. Locking the brakes on her wheelchair, Shepard took a moment to collect herself and steady her breath before using her arms to push herself upright out of the chair, balancing carefully on her legs. Without her usual crutch, her muscles trembled as she supported the weight of herself and her stomach, the wheelchair shaking ominously. Her mouth moved as she whispered his name, her mother's dress jacket she had balancing across her abdomen falling to the ground in a heap at her feet.

Kaidan stopped dead in his tracks as his eyes automatically moved from her face to the very obvious curve of her swollen stomach. His mouth gaped open, registering the sight that he was beholding. Shepard was pregnant. Very, _very_ pregnant. At least six months or so, with such a pronounced bump so obvious from where he stood. Calculations immediately began running through his mind. Six months back, they had been spending whatever opportunity they could in each others' arms on one final shore leave on the Citadel, as the final assault on the Cerberus base had loomed before them. He quickly counted on his fingers, barely daring to believe what he was seeing. That could only mean one thing.

Shepard's lips began to tremble in unison with her legs as she watched the Major stop before her, his eyes fixated at the sight of her swollen belly. She could see Kaidan clearly doing the math in his mind, before quickly checking on his own fingers as if to make sure he could trust his own mental calculation. Shepard's frantic heart threatened to burst open in her chest as she reached her arms forward in an attempt to inch closer to the Major without her crutch. The Commander felt the wind knocked out of her as Kaidan immediately collected her within his arms, with a heartbreaking cry of relief that resonated around the bay despite the loud hum of the _Normandy_.

Kaidan's lips fervently claimed Shepard's as he kissed her, reclaiming her as he never had before. Tasting her tears interspersed among their locked lips, he reveled in its saltiness as his lips moved to her scarred cheeks, her nose, her brows. The Major and Commander reunited for a million lifetimes in the bubble that had encompassed them in their reunion, seemingly alone and unseen in their own little world. The strong female soldier that Kaidan knew so well succumbed to her emotion in his arms as her legs buckled beneath her. Kaidan held her fast against his body as he basked in her hot breath against his skin, the feel of her temperature rising beneath his touch. Shepard gasped underneath his lips, tangling her fingers in his hair as she matched his passionate embrace with her own, savouring his unique smell and the roughness of his stubble against the sensitive skin of her face.

As Shepard began to sob loudly beneath his warm embrace, Kaidan unwrapped his arms from around her and dropped to his knees, continuing to hold her upright by her hips, his hands caressing her as if she were a goddess. Leaning forward, he pressed a loving, heartfelt kiss to the swollen skin of her stomach beneath her shirt. Underneath his lips, he felt the little life that he and Shepard created moving energetically beneath her taut skin, as if welcoming him home as well.

Behind Shepard and Kaidan, completely forgotten in their little bubble as their heads and emotions reeled from their long-awaited reunion, the _Normandy_ crew burst into applause and cheers that echoed deafeningly around the docking bay, finally home at last.

* * *

 

**Quick A/N:**

**YESSSSSSSS. THEY'RE REUNITEDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.**

**Hehe. Yes, it was a little cheesy & cliche`, I know. But it had to be ;)**

**Just a heads up in case anyone gets confused in the next couple of updates. Now that Shep and Kaidan have finally been reunited, there won't be as much need for the chapters at different POVs at the moment. Note, _at the moment_ , hehe. But oh, they will return towards the end for a good reason, don't you worry ;) This fanfic is no where near finished yet!**

***dum dum dummmmmmmm***

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	19. Chapter 19

**It's still N7 day here in Australia. So let us celebrate with some more Shenko smut! =)**

* * *

The door to Shepard's room in the Anderson Rehabilitation Wing had barely closed behind Kaidan as he hoisted the Commander out of her wheelchair and wrapped his strong arms around her slender frame, carrying her effortlessly across the room despite the bulk of her added weight. Intent on returning to a private room for a much anticipated emotional and physical reunion, Shepard and Kaidan had positively fled from the docking bay back to the rehab wing after the formalities of the _Normandy_ returning had been done and dusted. The afternoon since Shepard's ship had returned to dry dock had passed in a haze for the Commander, as she had individually welcomed home each and every crew member and thanked them for a mission well done. In a state of euphoria from being united with Kaidan, Shepard had even given a small speech to satiate the awaiting media, ensuring that her pregnant stomach was shielded well from view by her mother's jacket in her lap. Thankfully, her and Kaidan's rather intimate reunion had been hidden from the curious cameras by the large metal hull of the _Normandy_ , so no personal questions were asked other than how her physical therapy was progressing.

The reaction of Shepard's squad mates upon discovering her pregnancy was unexpected, to say the least. Shepard had envisioned congratulations, handshakes and perhaps a few handmade booties, but it surprised her to have Liara, Tali and Traynor burst promptly into tears and bury her beneath their arms as they pulled her out of her wheelchair in a tight group hug. James, Garrus, Joker and Cortez had slapped Kaidan on the back heartily, their excitement evident as they congratulation him and cheered for the new future that their commanding officers had created together. Even Javik had moved up to the Commander when she was finally released from the clutching arms of the women, taking her hands within his own and murmuring soft words to Shepard for only her ears to hear. Shepard's face was overcome with emotion as she took the Prothean within her arms in a tight hug, Javik looking incredibly uncomfortable as he patted her reassuringly on the head. His bright yellow eyes had looked at Kaidan imploringly, as if silently begging the Major to save him.

"Does this room have a 'do not disturb' sign?" Kaidan chuckled as he leaned against the solid frame of the door, capturing Shepard's lips underneath his own and delving his tongue deeply into her mouth. Shepard gestured in the general direction of the call bell buttons at the head of her queen bed, barely unable to see out of the corner of her eyes as she met his frenzied tongue with her own. "The blue-" she mumbled, unable to tear her lips away from Kaidan's- "the blue- one! Over there!"

Kaidan quickly crossed the room to the buzzer and slammed on the blue button with the side of his fist before returning it to eagerly grasp Shepard's body, slowly sitting down on the edge of the bed and positioning her on top of him so that she straddled him. The bed creaked under the doubled weight of the Commander and Major as it sagged, with Shepard visibly uncomfortable atop of Kaidan in the position.

"Kaidan, stop for a moment, please," Shepard muttered breathlessly as Kaidan's hands skimmed her arms before moving to her waist to remove her shirt, dragging it over her arms to expose her pale pink skin underneath. Her request appeared unheard by her hungry lover as his hands wandered over the curves of her breasts, slightly bigger than he remembered due to her changing body. Kaidan relished in the touch of her again beneath his fingertips before coming to rest on her swollen abdomen, caressing her belly button as it protruded from her navel. The Major's strong hands moved eagerly to the belt buckle of her pants, intent on relieving Shepard of all of her clothes.

"Kaidan, I said _stop_."

Surprised, Kaidan immediately ceased his ministrations, his fingers moving away from her belt buckle as if he had touched burning hot steel. He looked into Shepard's eyes, somewhat confused. "Are you worried it will hurt the baby?" he asked, his voice slightly panicked. "Because if you are, I've heard before that it is perfectly okay to..."

"No, no, it's not the baby."

Shepard moved herself heavily off of Kaidan's lap as best as she could with her limited mobility, before she pushed herself off the bed and clutched the beside table for support.

"What is it, Shepard?" Kaidan asked worriedly, ignoring his aching body as it yearned to bury himself in his lover. He was completely confused and unsure of why Shepard had suddenly stopped his advances, when she so clearly wanted them. Kaidan stood up carefully, his erection straining to be released within the tight confines of his fatigues. Shepard stood panting before him, her eyes downcast as she seemed to collect herself. "You're scaring me, Shepard. Please, tell me what's wrong?"

Shepard gently pushed herself past Kaidan back to the bed, turning to face him so that the back of her thighs touched the bed's soft mattress. Her fingers moved slowly to her belt, the metal of the clasp rattling a little beneath her shaking hands.

"I... haven't been able to tell you yet, Kaidan," she breathed, her voice audibly trembling. The woman before Kaidan was clearly anxious, a side to Shepard that he had never seen before. "I'm not as... whole, as I used to be."

"What do you mean?" Kaidan asked, surprised as he looked her up and down, his eyes resting on the taut skin of her stomach as it swelled with his growing child. "You're absolutely perfect, Shepard."

Unable to vocalize any further among her chattering teeth, Shepard undid the clasp of her pants and shed them with a swift motion, the thick material of the fatigues pooling at her feet. The sight of an unfamiliar carbon fibre limb, carefully embracing the stump of her right leg was suddenly visible to Kaidan's eyes. The Major felt his throat tighten as he realized exactly what he was seeing, Shepard's slender frame trembling as she stood exposed before him.

"Oh, Shepard," Kaidan gasped softly, taking in the sight of her prosthetic leg as it balanced the weight of her body in unison with her un-maimed left leg. It was blemished with multiple scars, a little less muscular than he remembered since her time back on Earth. Despite all of the changes to the body he knew so well since he had last seen her, Shepard's unwavering beauty continued to take Kaidan's breath away.

Kneeling on the floor before her, Kaidan slowly removed the prosthetic from what remained of her leg before peeling off the soft silicone cover that protected her skin from the semi-hard base. Discarding the silicone sleeve on the floor, his fingers trailed across the scarred and marked skin of the remainder of Shepard's right leg, tracing the ridges where it had healed after her surgery. He felt her muscles contract underneath his touch, her leg jerking slightly. Leaning forward, his lips trailed gentle kisses along the tender skin, blanched white from supporting the weight of her body against the prosthetic. He began massaging her flesh slowly to promote blood flow to return, her skin beginning to pink up again beneath his hands. Shepard closed her eyes and breathed deeply as she felt herself tingle under his touch, goosebumps forming across her body as he lovingly caressed her maimed limb.

"You are so beautiful, Shepard," Kaidan whispered, looking up into her eyes from his position before her. "Nothing is ever going to change that, you hear me?"

Shepard's eyes began to tear up as she watched the face of the man before her alight with love, his passion for her unwaivered despite the drastic changes to her body. She nodded, her chest tight. Reaching forward eagerly, Shepard grabbed the material of Kaidan's fatigues and pulled him forward towards her, locking lips with him as she kissed him with all of her being. Lying back onto the soft mattress of the bed, Shepard pulled him forward with her, Kaidan's arms snaking up beside her head as he stopped himself from crushing her underneath his weight, conscious of her pregnant belly beneath him.

"You really aren't upset with me for keeping you in the dark about the baby and my leg?" Shepard asked worriedly, pulling her lips away from Kaidan's hungry mouth for a moment. Responding only with a sexy moan that made her core throb achingly, Shepard quickly placed her finger over Kaidan's lips as he tried to reclaim her mouth. "Kaidan?"

"Not at all, Shepard," Kaidan replied, his wet lips trailing up and down her finger. "I will keep saying it again and again until you believe me."

Pushing himself onto his knees, Kaidan quickly relieved himself of his clothes, maneuvering himself around the Commander carefully as he kicked off his pants and boxers. The full sight of his muscular and toned body fully encompassed Shepard's field of vision, sending her head spinning. Shepard allowed him to pull her upwards to relieve her of her bra, flicking it over his shoulder as if it were just litter. Slowly moving to her waist, Kaidan trailed kisses along Shepard's stretched skin before hooking his fingers into the cotton of her underwear and sliding it down her legs, discarding it in a heap on the floor with the rest of their clothes.

"I was so afraid I had lost you again, Shepard," Kaidan murmured as his lips continued to map her skin, slowly snaking his way up to her body before capturing one of her breasts in his mouth. Shepard gasped and arched her back unconsciously, her nipples more sensitive than usual. Her hands reached for his back to grasp at him in the throes of her pleasure. "So afraid." Kaidan's devouring lips moved to her other breast, his mouth covering her nipples with a wet sheen as he teased them with his tongue, her sensitive skin tightening in his mouth. "Don't you _ever_ leave me again, you hear?"

"Yes, sir," Shepard replied breathlessly, her mind exploding from the erotic sensations that Kaidan was inducing with his tongue on the sensitive flesh of her breasts.

Conscious of her swollen belly, Kaidan carefully rolled Shepard onto her side, nibbling across the curve of her neck as she squirmed and moaned, the blue sheen of her biotics beginning to envelope their bodies as the temperature in the room quickly rose. Kaidan cupped the inside of her right thigh with his strong grip and parted her legs gently, closing his eyes to savor Shepard's touch as she reached behind her to caress his neck with her hands. In a smooth and fluid motion he entered her, pausing immediately in surprise as she cried out unexpectedly and clenched around him, her slick and sensitive flesh protesting painfully. Obviously worried for a moment that he had injured her, Shepard's free hand moved to Kaidan's hips in order to grip his buttocks beneath her palms, enticing him to begin thrusting despite her heightened levels of sensitivity.

"I love you Shepard," Kaidan groaned against her ear as her head moved back with every thrust into the groove of his collarbone. He felt the familiar tickling of his L2 implant as it begin to fire up, his biotics beginning to flare, the familiar glow of a rich mass effect field encasing their connected bodies as he slowly moved inside Shepard. Her moans spurred him on in an encouraging tempo as Kaidan began to move faster and faster, the deep ache he had caused Shepard from his initial penetration turning to pleasure as her entrance stretched accommodatingly around his hard length.

I love you too, Kaidan," Shepard gasped, her hands clenching at the bed sheets as she savored the feeling of her soulmate moving inside of her hot core, her mind and heart abuzz with the heat and passion of their physical reunion. "Don't stop. Oh please, don't ever stop."

* * *

The bright Vancouver sun seeped through the closed blinds of Shepard's room in the Anderson Wing, casting a warm glow over the occupants of the bed. Shepard stretched among her pillows and yawned rather loudly, feeling more invigorated and refreshed than she had in a long time. As she slowly blinked the sleep out of her eyes, she began to feel the sensation of something warm and sticky trickling down between her thighs as she sat forward. Sighing contentedly, Shepard pivoted herself to the side of bed, the thick blankets bunching up to cover her waist. She quickly slid on a spare silicon sleeve from her beside table for her prosthetic, barely registering what she was seeing as she slowly limped to the bathroom to wash off the reminder of their lovemaking the night before. So caught up in their passion, Shepard had lost count of the number of times that she and Kaidan had made love, making up for all of those months that they had lost. Her feminine core ached comfortably as she hummed happily to herself, gripping the railings attached to the walls of the room in support as she stepped over the small amounts of scattered debris that littered the floor, left in the wake of their biotic shockwaves as they climaxed together.

Grabbing a face towel and wetting it under the water faucet, Shepard squeezed out the excess water absentmindedly and began to scrub between her legs, bending over slightly to that she could reach around the swollen expanse of her stomach. All the while her eyes remained focused on the reflection of Kaidan in the mirror before her, his muscular frame sprawled across her bed. Half of his backside and thighs were uncovered by the blankets, his tanned skin alight under the warm morning sun streaming through the windows. Shepard smiled at the sight, her chest radiating in warmth as she reflected on the intense night of repeated lovemaking, noting the number of broken fixtures around her room that could attest to it.

Bringing up the wet face towel from beneath her to rinse it, Shepard was met with the sight of the terry toweling in her hand covered with thick, bright red blood.

Kaidan jumped, immediately sitting upright in the bed as he was brought back to the land of the awake by the sound of a blood-curdling shriek from the ensuite. Pulling back the doona covers beside him in a panic to find Shepard, his eyes strained to focus on a large stain of frank red blood covering the bedsheets. Dread rising in his chest and his heart racing, the Major catapulted himself off of the bed despite his nakedness and ran to the bathroom to find a similarly un-clothed Shepard collapsed on the floor before him. Her thighs were caked and covered in fresh red blood, her green eyes flooding with tears and her beautiful features distraught as she cupped her pregnant belly beneath her hands.

* * *

**Authors's warning: potential triggers in upcoming chapters. I encourage you to not read any further if you find anything extremely upsetting due to personal experiences, & I apologize sincerely in advance if it has brought up any painful memories for you. xx**


	20. Chapter 20

**Author's Warning: potential abortion trigger. Please continue reading at your own discretion if this is a sensitive topic for you. xx**

* * *

_Shepard wandered around the metal halls of the Normandy, doing a final lap of checking on her crew before retiring from the night. Exhausted from her mission to retrieve the Prothean AI Vendetta from the Illusive Man's base earlier that day, Shepard was eager to return to her quarters to pop a couple of anti-nausea pills and bury herself between Kaidan and her bedsheets, feeling as though she had been run over by a Mako. Crossing into the mess hall from the gun battery where Garrus was routinely calibrating, the Commander caught sight of Doctor Chakwas waving at her through the windows of the med bay, trying to get her attention._

_Chakwas gestured to one of the rock-hard beds in the corner of the room, tinting the glass windows of the bay with a quick tap on her omni-tool as Shepard stepped wearily through the automatic doors. "Take a seat please, Shepard."_

_Shepard hoisted herself onto the bed and looked at the doctor expectantly._

_"How is the nausea and vomiting going, Commander?" Chakwas asked, sitting down onto her wheeled chair and propelling herself across the floor with a kick of her feet, coming to a stop before the Commander. She clutched a data pad in her gloved hand._

_"Getting a little worse, to be honest," Shepard replied, her face pale as she licked her slightly dry lips. "The IV fluids that you gave me before the mission really helped, otherwise I don't think I would have made it through without passing out... Have you found out what sort of stomach bug I've picked up, Doc? Is it because of Vega's cooking?"_

_"Your stool sample came back clear," Chakwas replied, looking down at her datapad. "I had run a number of tests on your blood sample." The Normandy doctor sighed heavily, looking at the tired face of the Commander before her. "There is no other way for me to say this, Shepard," Chakwas continued. "I found significantly high levels of human chorionic gonadotropin hormone in your blood. You are pregnant."_

_There was silence in the med bay as the Commander blinked her tired green eyes at the doctor before her. She began to shake her head immediately. "No way. That's impossible," she replied adamantly. "It's not possible for me to get pregnant. Cerberus..."_

_"Brought you back to life, essentially just as you were before you died," Chakwas finished Shepard's sentence for her. "Give or take the cybernetics. A few upgrades. The new biotic implant. Your cybernetics are actually the reason why I think you are suffering from extreme morning sickness so suddenly, Commander. Your body is quite sensitive to the surge in hormones."_

_Shepard continued to shake her head in denial. "It's not possible, Chakwas. There must be a mistake."_

_"Commander, you know how good I am at my work," Chakwas replied, reaching forward to hold Shepard's face still beneath her hands as the Commander continued to shake her head. Holding gently onto Shepard's chin, the warm eyes of the doctor locked onto Shepard's bright green ones. "This baby is no immaculate conception, Shepard," she smiled, somewhat sadly. "I've seen you and Major Alenko together. We all know what's going on between you both. There is absolutely no mistaking it. You are very, very pregnant."_

_Shepard's heart sank as she grasped the unexpected news that Chakwas had presented her with. Overcome with a wave of nausea she quickly leaned forward, gripping the hard surface of the med bay bed beneath her. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths, the sound of her inhaling echoing loudly among the private confines of the bay. A thick feeling of dread began to wash over her, her throat constricted. She immediately pushed the images of a plump, innocent newborn out of her head._

_"When is the soonest that I can get rid of it, Doc?"_

_Doctor Chakwas dropped the datapad in surprise, the sound of it clattering against the metal floor of the med bay._

_"Surely you don't really mean that, Commander?"_

_Shepard locked her green eyes with the doctor's, her features becoming firm in the determined look that Chakwas knew so well. "Please don't judge me, Chakwas," she replied a little more fiercely than she meant to. "I absolutely mean it."_

_"This baby you have conceived is a miracle, to say the least, Commander," Chakwas spoke gently. "Despite Cerberus being able to bring you back with a fully functioning reproductive system, you have a condition that was once known as poly cystic ovarian syndrome back in the older days. They were able to revive your ovarian tissue, but were never truly able to replicate the hormone production in your ovaries to allow you to have regular periods and ovulate monthly."_

_"It doesn't matter if this child is the baby Jesus, doctor," Shepard replied bluntly, her lips quivering. "Humanity is on the brink of extinction. The Reapers have the Catalyst and we have a far-fetched plan we pulled out of our arses to somehow sail past them and dock our Crucible on the Citadel without them noticing. Our mission is so desperate. I am not going to bring a new life into a world that is so close to ending." Shepard bowed her head, looking down at her hands as she clenched and un-clenched them in her lap. "What's the point in having a child, feeling it grow underneath my skin, falling in love with it, watching it take a first breath when it's born, only to witness it slaughtered because we didn't manage to defeat the Reapers? Better to end that little life before it is ever born. Better to never be subjected to such atrocities."_

_Chakwas was silent in response to Shepard's explanation, reaching forward to grip the Commander's slightly trembling hands beneath her own in a maternal manner._

_"So when can I have the procedure done, Doc?" Shepard repeated, her eyes steadfast in her determination to convey her wishes to the Normandy's doctor._

_"I'm not going to perform the procedure until I know for sure that it is what you want, Shepard," Chakwas replied, trying as best as she could to mask the look of disappointment crossing her face. She raised a finger as Shepard's mouth opened in protest, silencing her. "You will have to do a few counseling sessions with me first, just to make sure that you are making the right decision for yourself." Chakwas squeezed Shepard's hand firmly beneath her own reassuringly. "But if I am sure that is truly what you want, I will do it for you as soon as possible." She handed Shepard a small blister pack of anti-emetic tablets that she produced from a pocket in her uniform. "Sleep on it tonight for now, Commander. Speak to Kaidan about it. We'll discuss it again in the morning, okay?"_

* * *

_"Kaidan?"_

_"Mrmmm?" the Major replied, his voice muffled somewhat as he buried his face into the crook of Shepard's neck, sweaty and hot in the aftermath of their lovemaking. Their implants sizzled as the energy from both of their biotics began to fade. Kaidan's fingers trailed down the curve of Shepard's hips as he held her close against him, feeling her hot breath against his chest._

_"Do you ever want to have children one day?" Shepard asked, Kaidan's racing pulse thumping against her ear._

_"Absolutely, Shepard," Kaidan smiled, his fingers trailing through her strands of black hair. "I've always wanted to be a father, for as long as I can remember. What about you?"_

_"I guess so. One day, once this is all over," Shepard waved her hand in what she hoped was a casual manner._

_"Why do you ask, Shepard?" Kaidan bent his head to look down at her face, slightly worried as she nestled against his chest._

_"Just thinking about the future," Shepard replied vaguely. "Thinking about what life will be like if we actually manage to pull this off. Wondering about what might never be..."_

_"Don't talk like that," Kaidan crooned, placing a gentle kiss to her sweaty brow as his fingers continued to stroke her hair, causing her nerves to tingle in pleasure. "I've had the future mapped out in my mind for a while now. You and me, retired from the Alliance, living in my parents' orchard back in Vancouver. A little girl, with my brown hair and your green eyes playing at our feet. Another baby cooking away in your belly." Kaidan chuckled, a little embarrassed about vocalizing the future that he had pictured for so long with Shepard. He felt the Commander sigh softly before she made to roll over so that her back nestled against his front, her buttocks brushing against his sensitive member. Kaidan wrapped his arms tightly around her as she snuggled into the shape of his body, fitting together perfectly like two pieces in a puzzle._

_"One day soon when this is over, we'll have it all Shepard," Kaidan whispered in her ear as his hands trailed downwards to caress her lower abdomen. "You, me, a family. Little children running around that we can look at and say are half of you and half of me. One day soon."_

* * *

Kaidan sat vigilantly at Shepard's bedside, her trembling hands clasped tightly beneath his own strong ones. He frantically tried to blink away the tears that kept threatening to spill out of his eyes as he tried to comfort the distraught woman on the bed before him, doing his best to calm Shepard down. Barely back to Earth for twenty-four hours, he had been presented with a Shepard that he had never quite seen before, even before he had found her on the floor drenched in blood. It was as if the Reaper war and the aftermath of her grueling recovery had taken something valuable from the battle-hardened soldier, turning the the War Hero of the Skyllian Blitz and Savior of the Galaxy back into a vulnerable woman.

After finding Shepard on the ensuite floor, Kaidan had immediately hit the emergency button on the wall of the bathroom before hastily covering Shepard and himself with towels, a handful of nurses rushing into the room in response. Immediately seeing the reason for the distress call, they had swiftly lifted Shepard onto a gurney retrieved from heaven knew where and rushed her out of the rehabilitation ward to the acute wing of the Alliance hospital across the base. Kaidan barely had a chance to pull on some clothes to make himself decent amongst his racing thoughts/ Wheeled immediately into an emergency bay, Kaidan was left for a moment to try console Shepard as she turned to pieces before his eyes, her distraught hands trying to clutch at her belly as she prayed and implored their baby to be okay.

Despite trying to maintain a strong and steady presence to reassure Shepard, Kaidan was completely scared out of his wits. There had been so, so much blood. It could only mean that something was terribly wrong with their baby.

The familiar form of Doctor Chloe Michel whizzed through the doors of the emergency bay, her doctor's uniform sizzling after passing through decontamination.

"Commander Shepard, Major Alenko," she nodded, immediately skipping the pleasantries as she sat down quickly onto a wheeled stool at the Commander's bedside. It pained the doctor that after not seeing Shepard for a while since being moved to the rehabilitation ward, they had met again in such painful circumstances. Snapping a pair of latex gloves expertly over her hands, she moved to Shepard's legs to lift up the towel that Kaidan had draped over her waist. "Spread, please."

Shepard immediately opened her legs, clenching her eyes shut as tears poured down her freckled cheeks, her nails digging into Kaidan's hands as she tried her best to collect herself. She could feel the doctor examining her gently and respectfully before quickly raising her head to view again, re-positioning the towel to cover Shepard's waist. "Have you felt any movements, Commander?" Michel asked, ripping off the blood-covered gloves and quickly squeezing alcohol rub over her palms from the bottle perched at the end of the gurney frame.

"Not at all," Shepard whispered, her voice barely audible as it trembled. Kaidan sniffed loudly at her side and pressed a kiss to her shaking hands within his own, desperately trying to blink back his tears. "Not since... not since last night now that you mention it. As far as I can remember."

Michel nodded, her hands palpating Shepard's protruding stomach gently as she felt around to ascertain the position of the baby. "Fetch me an omni-sound machine, asap," she muttered over her shoulder to the nurse who waited patiently out of view. "I know this is hard at the moment, Commander, but I need you to try relax, okay?"

Shepard nodded, Kaidan's fingers stroking the tufts of her growing fringe gently.

It seemed to take forever for the nurse to return with a familiar looking machine that Shepard recognized from her anatomy scan with Miranda, although realistically she had been less than five minutes. Michel positioned it swiftly atop of Shepard's swollen stomach, the blood stains of the sheets and towels turning almost black under the harsh orange light of the machine. Shepard felt the familiar warm sensation as the device basked her skin and began to hum, Michel's fingers flying over the device's terminal at her side. Craning his neck to look at the screen on top of the concave wall encasing Shepard's lower abdomen, Kaidan moved ever so slightly so that he could see what the doctor was doing.

"Just talk to me, okay Doctor?" Shepard whispered pitifully. "Please don't keep us in the dark while you look?"

"Of course not, Commander," Michel replied reassuringly, tapping away at the terminal. Kaidan saw the doctor's shoulders visibly relax, a spark of hoping sprouting in his chest at the hint. "Here," Michel reached around and pointed to the screen on the machine in Shepard and Kaidan's sight. "Your baby. It's alive. It has a strong heartbeat." Michel smiled as she heard the parents gasp loudly in relief, Shepard's voice hiccuping as she threatened to burst into uncontrollable sobs. "I must say, your baby seems to be an intelligent one, that's for sure. Brain activity is off the charts! Very normal though," she added quickly as Shepard jumped slightly, obviously alarmed. "Your baby is constantly learning things in-utero. I think it's safe to say it is just more receptive to what is going on around it than other babies."

The Commander and Major were met with a third-dimensional projection of their growing baby on their screen before them, drinking in the sight of its perfect little features. Kaidan felt a surge of emotion he had never experienced before within his body as his heart swelled within his chest, his brown eyes barely daring to believe that the little baby before him was actually the child that he and Shepard had created together. Cliche` though he knew it would sound, Kaidan immediately fell in love with his child.

"But all of that blood...?" Shepard dared to ask, grasping Kaidan's hand firmly as the Major pressed a heartfelt kiss to her forehead, his eyes wet with emotion.

Doctor Michel nodded in acknowledgement, her eyes returning to focus on the terminal of the omni-sound device before her. "I can see exactly what the cause of all the bleeding is, Commander," she replied in a reassuring tone. "Your placenta, the life support machine of your baby I guess you could say, is partially covering your cervix. Your baby's entrance and exit point, if you will," she tacked on, noticing the confused look on Shepard and Kaidan's faces. "It is called placenta previa. A fairly rare pregnancy complication that is not commonly seen nowadays, but given your past history it is no surprise that you were at higher risk of developing it."

"But why so much blood all of a sudden?"

"Intercourse, I suspect," Michel smiled, pretending not to see Shepard and Kaidan both blush profusely together. "A little bit too much celebrating causes a lot of friction and aggravation on your sensitive cervix, Commander. Hence the bleeding. You will have to be extremely careful from now on until you deliver."

"Miranda did mention that my placenta was low," Shepard mumbled, reflecting back on her anatomy scan with the former Cerberus Operative. "I didn't even think..."

"It wouldn't have been an issue a number of weeks ago, as placentas generally move as the uterus expands with the baby while it grows," Michel explained.

"So my placenta can't still move off of my cervix as I get further along?" Shepard asked, wiping her eyes with the side of her hand.

"Generally, no," Michel explained. "Not when you are so close to your third trimester."

"So what does this mean?" Kaidan asked. "The baby will be okay, won't it?"

"It means that you won't be able to deliver your baby vaginally, Commander," Michel replied, talking more directly to Shepard. "We will need to monitor you regularly, make sure there is no further bleeding. Once you reach term you will need to be scheduled for an elective cesarean section. There is no other alternative if we are to make sure that your baby survives birth. Placenta previa is a life or death situation for mother and baby. If you were to go into labour naturally the placenta wall will detach from your cervix as it dilates, causing placental abruption. Essentially, your baby's life support would detach and it would no longer have a supply of oxygen whilst it is inside of you."

"That's... full on," Shepard whispered. "But our baby is alive. That's the most important thing. Cut me open whenever you need to doc, I just want he or she to be born safe and healthy."

"Do we know if it is a he or she...?" Kaidan dared ask, his mind hardly registering the onslaught of medical terminology that Doctor Michel had thrown at him.

"I had wanted to wait until you were here with me before I found out," Shepard mumbled, locking his soft brown eyes with her own. "Can you see the baby's gender, Doctor...?"

Michel smiled. "You have a perfectly healthy baby girl growing in there, I am pleased to say."

Kaidan could not stop the excited gasp that escaped his lips, with Shepard positively squealing beside him on the gurney. "A girl!" Kaidan breathed, immediately reaching forward to gather as much of Shepard as he could in his arms. "I can't believe it!" He could feel Shepard's gasps as she cried in the safe embrace of his arms, the stress of the past hour catching up with her in an onslaught of tears. Kaidan gently stroked her hair and mumbled in her ear in a comforting manner, his mind exploding as he began to envision what their daughter would look like and what to name her.

"So, Commander," Doctor Michel added, reluctant to break up the emotional parents before her. "You are to be on strict bed rest now until you are full term. No more physical therapy. No more sex whatsoever," she added while looking at Kaidan, as if aiming it at him. Unable to control himself, the Major's face fell slightly. "Stick to kissing," Michel smiled. "It's only for another four months or so, give or take depending on your recovery from the c-section and post-partum bleeding. You will both survive the abstinence, I am sure." She chuckled as she began to move the omni-sound machine off of Shepard's abdomen, issuing instructions to the nurse behind her out of the corner of her mouth.

"That was quite the welcome back from your child, wasn't it?" Shepard asked softly amongst her sobs, resting her head against Kaidan's strong chest as he embraced her close. It took a while for her palpitating heart to begin to settle back into a normal and more regular rhythm, the relief that their child was alive and alright beginning to sink in fully. "I am so sorry for turning into an emotional wreck, Kaidan," she apologized, looking up at the strong outline of his face on top of her. "I don't think I can quite blame it entirely on pregnancy hormones at the moment though, given everything that's happened."

"At least we're together now," Kaidan smiled, pressing kisses to her soft hair. "You, me and our daughter. It still hasn't quite sunk in. We're at the precipice of the life that I had always dreamed for us, Shepard." He paused, running his hand lovingly over the pronounced curve of her stomach. "A few more months when our daughter is here, and we will have it all, just like I promised."

* * *

**So.**

**I figured I would have had to have been pretty mean to not have quickly updated after the cliffhanger from the previous chapter, given that I will probably disappear for a few days with my new copy of _Fallout 4._ I'm hoping that this chapter did not disappoint!**

**Updates will probably not be as regular as they have been in the next couple of weeks, I'm afraid. I am hoping to have a chapter out every two weeks or so, at the latest. We are inching ever so close to the end now, & there is still plenty of twists and turns to come before this fanfic ends. Because I can't seem to stop putting them in, hehe. I like to keep it interesting.**


	21. Chapter 21

 

 

 

 

 

 

**I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack.**

**Again.**

**That break from updating felt a lot longer than it actually was- probably because I was updating so regularly beforehand. Alas, I have finished as much of Fallout 4 as I have been able to before the DLC is released, so it's time to come back to my Mass Effect fanfiction and finish it.**

**I will admit, I got myself into a little rut with this chapter that I struggled to dig myself out of. You'll probably be able to notice it as you read that it didn't quite come together as I had it planned in my head. Probably because I've never been to a military service and have no idea how they are run... and I find filler chapters a little harder to write. Gah. Feel free to tell me your thoughts!**

**Lots to do, lots to do. Let's get back to the happy couple, shall we?**

* * *

The weeks following the Normandy's return to Earth had flown by - or crawled by, if one asked the heavily pregnant Shepard- with almost every waking moment spent with Kaidan, frequent visits from her squadmates, Kaidan, regular monitoring and non-stress tests on the baby, Kaidan, and bed. Oh, the endless, endless days confined to the bed. While ever-grateful that for Kaidan's constant and unwavering companionship since the Normandy had returned to Earth, despite the welcome distraction that he brought there was only so long that the Alliance Commander could handle being restricted to bed when her recently re-conditioned body itched to be active again.

And, if Shepard were to be brutally honest, her well-meaning and ever-loyal squadmates were not making it much easier to pass the time.

" _Madre de Dios_ , Lola, you are looking huge!" James had remarked to Shepard when he and Lieutenant Cortez had first visited the Commander after she been discharged from the rehabilitation ward. "Don't get me wrong, hot as ever Lola, but _dayum_ growing a human looks uncomfortable as hell..." He balked a little as Cortez elbowed him hard in the ribs. "Ahem. But like I said. Still mighty fine, Shepard. Want some eggs?"

When Garrus and Tali had stopped by the apartment so that Garrus could calibrate Shepard's omni-tool, Tali had poked at the swollen expanse of Shepard's belly, squealing in delight when the baby prodded her back in response. "Keelah!" the Quarian had exclaimed excitedly at the Commander's bump, her glowing eyes widening as she watched the mountain of belly move from side to side underneath Shepard's shirt. "It is absolutely astounding, Shepard, that a little human is even able to fit in there. Infant Quarians are born so much smaller in comparison. You're having surgery to birth her, yes?" Tali asked innocently as she looked up at Shepard's grimacing face. "Where do they usually come out if you don't have surgery?"

"Probably from around the same place where you got your omni-tattoo, Tali," Garrus had muttered as Shepard's omni-tool flickered, trying to focus on his calibrations. Tali made a small choking sound.

Joker had shuffled unannounced into the apartment early one evening as Shepard and Kaidan lay entwined on their bed, watching re-runs of _Battlestar Galactica_ and devouring cartons of Chinese takeaway. Sophie, the robotic dog that had roamed the shuttle bay of the Normandy, followed closely at the pilot's heels. Oblivious to the fact that the Commander and Major were wearing less attire than they otherwise would have had they known that he had been coming to visit, Joker pushed open their bedroom door without so much as a knock before depositing a six pack of beer on the end of the bed. Mumbling that the scientists were making good progress in restoring EDI, he had crawled in under the sheets in the space beside Kaidan and helped himself to a box of half eaten satay noodles that sat open on the bedside table. "Good show, this," Joker had nodded with satisfaction at their choice of entertainment as he began to shovel noodles into his mouth. "Great characters. Pass me a beer, would you Kaidan?"

Javik had shifted uncomfortably as he sat perched on the ottoman in Shepard and Kaidan's bedroom, watching Liara and Traynor flutter about excitedly as they presented their gift of an enormous box of baby clothes to the Commander. His four eyes were expressionless whenever Liara made to show him a particular cute romper or onesie, cooing and clucking about in a manner rather uncharacteristic of the Asari. The Prothean's posture remained rigid as he ignored all subtle hints thrown his way by Liara that she hoped one day soon to have a little blue baby of their own. Eventually taking pity on him, Kaidan had pulled Javik out of their bedroom, leaving Shepard to suffer alone while Liara and Traynor continued to show her their endless bounty of pink frills and lace.

"If I'm stuck in this bed any longer, I am going to go crazy, Kaidan," Shepard had muttered to Kaidan through clenched teeth as the Major lolled across the end of their bed after his shower, the sight of his bare arse causing all sorts of sensations and tingles in places that the Commander dared not think about. "For the sake of my mental health, please tell those doctors over at HQ that I need to get out of this damn bed before I lose my head and hijack a shuttle. For the love of all that is holy Kaidan, _please_."

"When I said strict bed-rest, I did not mean that the Commander had to be literally bed-bound, Major," Doctor Michel had blinked at Kaidan when he had sought her out via video comm that afternoon, Shepard snoring softly in the bedroom behind him. Having returned to Huerta Memorial Hospital in the Citadel with Doctor Chakwas to give their expertise on a number of urgent cases, Michel had left Shepard's antenatal care in the hands of Alliance doctors until she returned to perform the scheduled ceasarean section. "The advice of bed-rest in pregnancy means limiting any physical activity that could put extra stress on mother and baby. Like Shepard's rehabilitation and training for instance, or physical intimacy between you both. Light walking is absolutely fine, and completely unavoidable. I certainly do not want the Commander to lose conditioning after all of her hard work since she woke up... Ohhh. I see. You and Rear-Admiral Shepard took me a little too literally when I used the term "bed-rest". My apologies, Major. I should have been a lot clearer."

Feeling a little guilty for the protective bubble that he had smothered Shepard and their unborn child in since learning of their more fragile condition, Kaidan relayed his conversation with the doctor back to the Commander when she woke, only to have the duvet and pillows fly across the bedroom as Shepard propelled herself as swiftly as she could out the bed. Despite being somewhat encumbered with the growing bowling ball of her belly, Shepard had eagerly fastened her prosthetic into place before she hobbled out of the bedroom door without so much as a backward glance. Kaidan was left looking a little perplexed before he heaved the mess of linen back onto the bed and followed his baby momma out into the lounge of their temporary apartment, shaking his head as Shepard immediately pulled on a hoodie over her pyjamas and motioned him to follow her out of the front door.

Whilst ever thankful that their unborn daughter was healthy and well, a very bored and rather hormonal Shepard could not help but curse the state of abstinence that had been forced on the newly reunited pair due to the unexpected complication in her pregnancy. With Kaidan being placed on an extended leave of absence by the Alliance until after the birth of their child, the two lovers had been intent on making up for the long and grueling months spent apart after their unexpected situation. Time that might once have been spent naked and intertwined in each others arms was now spent mostly content in warm embraces and conversation on the bed, the planning of their future with their unborn daughter giving the two something else to focus on besides the passionate fire burning deep within their cores.

Despite the overwhelming feeling of contentment that the Major had felt upon returning to Earth and learning of his impending fatherhood, Kaidan had spent many a night utilizing the time after Shepard had surrendered her tired body to the prison of their bed in order to spend long hours scanning Alliance databases. While the beginning of his very own family grew in the safe harbour of Shepard's womb, Kaidan secretly searched for any hints of the whereabouts of his family, deliberately keeping his hunt a secret from the Commander so as not to worry her. Details on his father after the retired Alenko reported for duty were sketchy and incomplete as the war had escalated, with his last location noted to be at a small outpost to the north of Vancouver that had been decimated before the end of the Reaper War. If there was one thing that Kaidan had learned from falling in love with Commander Shepard, however, it was that he should never give up on a loved one, despite evidence all but confirming that his parents had perished along with the millions of casualties in the wake of the war. Pushing the thought of giving up to the back of his mind, Kaidan took a deep swig from his mug of cold coffee on the desk beside his terminal before crackling his knuckles loudly and initiating a download of lists of refugees from the surrounding camps.

The small flame of hope that Kaidan had harboured in his heart that at least one of his parents had survived the war threatened to extinguish with each passing day.

* * *

Shepard sighed heavily as she watched a runaway button roll around in circles on the floor, the sound of the metal as it skimmed the tiles echoing around the hotel room before finally coming to a rest at her feet. She brushed her hand over the lower section of her dress coat where it had previously been attached only a minute ago, her swollen belly straining almost painfully against the tight fabric. Surveying herself again in the mirror before her, Shepard bit her bottom lip as she took in the reflection of the tired and heavily pregnant woman staring back at her, donned in the fresh dress blues of a Systems Alliance Commander. Despite the obvious differences in her reflection from only a number of months beforehand, the shuttle ride to the Citadel from Earth had proved quite exhausting for Shepard, and her increasing fatigue as she neared the end of her pregnancy showed across her healed features.

Turning her attention to her sleeved wrists, Shepard began to fumble with the cuff links, her non-dominant hand clutching clumsily at the small pieces of emblem-shaped stainless steel. Before becoming a hormonal and occasionally emotional incubator, it might have amused the Commander once that despite being able to head-shot a target from across a firing range with her non-dominant hand, the simplest of tasks could still test her dexterity and finer motor movement. Shepard swore softly to herself as her fingers lost grip of the links and they fell to join her runaway button on the tiled floor, before automatically positioning her crutch against the wall to bend down and retrieve them.

"Don't even think about it, Shepard," Kaidan's warm and husky voice interrupted behind her. The Commander caught herself before she bent any further at the waist, looking over her shoulder at the bare-chested Major behind her as he paused in his dressing, discarding his freshly-pressed shirt on the bed. He crossed the small distance between them, with Shepard's face growing hot as she watched his bulging muscles flex as he bent over to retrieve the cursed cuff links, silently hoping he'd hand them back to her so that she could drop them again.

Despite the man of her affections bending over before her, Shepard appeared somewhat disgruntled while she held her wrists out to Kaidan so that he could fasten the links in place. "This is getting ridiculous," Shepard muttered, her pride smarting. "I can't bend over, not even to put on my own shoes. Next you'll be telling me I won't be able to wash my own backside again. I need this baby out already, Kaidan."

"All in good time, Shepard," Kaidan reminded her, tugging her sleeves down and running his fingers lovingly across her hands before pressing a soft kiss to her fingertips. Smiling as Shepard shivered under his touch, he bent down once more to help her slip on her dress shoes, squaring his shoulders so that she could hold onto the broad expanse of his back for balance. "It's going to be a long day," Kaidan added, straightening to watch Shepard carefully perch her official cap above her ever-growing locks of hair. "Are you sure that you're both up to it, Shepard?"

"Up for Anderson's memorial? You know that I wouldn't miss it for the world," Shepard sighed, turning back to her reflection and leaning back into Kaidan's muscular chest as he came up to stand behind her. She rested her hands atop of Kaidan's as he placed them protectively over her stomach, turning her head so that her cheeks brushed the dusting of dark hair growing over Kaidan's chest. "The award ceremony with the Citadel Council and the media though?..." Shepard paused, a feeling of dread settling upon her. "Makes me feel sick that I'll be receiving awards that others are more deserving of. If it wasn't scheduled to take place during Anderson's memorial, I'd probably try getting out of it by pretending that I'm going into labour."

* * *

There was a loud outburst of gasping and murmuring among the crowd seated within the epicenter of the Citadel Tower as Shepard slowly stepped out onto the stage, her crutch clasped firmly underneath her arm. Immediately sensing the excitement that began to buzz across the audience, Shepard could feel the attention of hundreds of eyes fixated not on her, the Savior of the Galaxy, but on the little life she so obviously harbored in her belly. With only two weeks before she was considered at term and scheduled to receive another scar to add to her already impressive collection, it was evident to herself and Admiral Hackett that they could no longer keep her impending motherhood a secret from the public.

The ceremony had been set up to take place facing away from the Petitioner's stage at the far end of the Citadel Tower, opposite to the Council's audience chamber. Rows and rows of seating had been strategically placed across the flights of stairs in order to boast a clear view of the stage that had been erected atop of the flat patch of garden near the elevators. Despite the rather cramped surroundings however, the location chosen for the ceremony could not have been more appropriate, given its intention.

Ignoring the excited babble that arose from the crowd when she appeared, Shepard crossed the carpeted stage in order to make her way to her designated seat beside Hackett and the other Citadel Councillors. Kaidan's familiar faced beamed at her from beside her mother and Joker in the front row of the audience, the other crew members of the Normandy seated in the rows behind them. Much to Shepard's surprise, she noted Wrex seated among the Councillors, who winked warmly under his scarred faceplate as he gave Shepard a thumbs up.

To the centre of the stage, set up next to the impressive-looking podium, stood a simple memorial with a holo of Anderson positioned next to a silver urn of what Shepard assumed could only be her old friend's un-scattered ashes. With a thick lump forming in her throat, Shepard settled herself in the seat beside her uncle, closing her eyes in order to avoid the feeling of nausea that was being induced by the flashing lights of the media as the ceremony commenced.

The monotonous voice of the master of ceremonies radiated throughout the speakers situated around the Tower floor. "We are gathered here today, not only to acknowledge and celebrate the achievements of those who fought in the war against the Reapers, but to pay our respects and farewell another. He could not be here with us today to celebrate the Galaxy's victory against the greatest threat in Council history, after he lost his life in the line of duty..."

Occasionally trying to focus whenever she heard her name spoken- which was often, given the nature of the ceremony- Shepard counted the minutes that passed with every squirm and kick of her baby beneath her skin, silently wishing to have the entire award presentation over and done with so that she could focus her attentions on Anderson's memorial service. The sound of Hackett's chair scraping against the floor slightly beside her as he took to the podium brought her attention back to her surroundings with a jump, the baby kicking Shepard's ribs hard in protest. The audience gasped, applauded and murmured throughout the Admiral's address as he spoke at length of the near-annihilation organics had almost faced, Admiral Anderson's sacrifice, Shepard's part in securing victory for the Galaxy against the Reapers, and the role that the Normandy's crew played as they supported their Commander during her mission.

"On behalf of the Citadel Council and all of its united races, it is with great honour that I invite the crew members of the SSV Normandy to take to the stage and receive the Galactic Unit Citation," Hackett announced proudly, flourishing his hands in the direction of Shepard's crew. "The highest honour that can be awarded to a military unit, we recognize the strength and gallantry of the Normandy's crew, above and beyond that recognized by the Palladium Star." There was a distinct hush across the audience as Shepard's crew stood up from their places and respectfully filed onto the stage to receive their accolades.

"What is this?" Javik asked curiously, his dolorous voice echoing as he took the medallion handed to him by the official and turned it over in his fingers, neglecting to shake the official's outstretched hand. "How primitive. Such trinkets were considered unnecessary in the Empire." The Prothean looked puzzled as Liara gently pushed him forward, respectfully taking her medallion and the hand of the official with a pained expression on her face.

Shepard's heart swelled with pride as she watched, chuckling as she noted Joker removing his cap to reveal a crop of unbrushed and messy curls, an unfamiliar look of seriousness and respect on his face. As Kaidan stepped forward last from the line to receive his medal, Shepard pushed herself up heavily from her seat to lead a deafening round of applause from the audience, her crew slowly filing off the stage to return to their seats.

"Commander Shepard, if you would step forward, please."

The audience's applause immediately ceased and excited murmuring began as the Commander abandoned her crutch beside her seat, her pregnant belly once again coming into full view as she straightened her jacket and shuffled forward from her seat. The lights of the media caused her vision to bleach, flashing continuously as the numerous flycams fixated their focus on her from their positions around the Tower. Shepard slowly limped to the centre of the stage before assuming a formal stance, clasping her hands behind her back and praying that the buttons of her coat would survive the straining of her stomach. Incredibly nervous, Shepard focused her own eyes away from the staring audience as the Councillors of each race stepped forward from their assigned seats and began to form a line.

The newest Salarian Councillor, a slightly hunchbacked female that Shepard had never met before, shuffled towards the Commander in order to fasten a glistening metal dagger to the front of her dress jacket. "Commander Shepard, on behalf of the Salarian people, I hereby present you with the Silver Dagger, the most prestigious award given by the Salarian Union to symbolize the respect and loyalty that you have gained from our people, in light of the part you played in ensuring that our race emerged triumphant from the Reaper War."

Shepard nodded respectfully and shook the Councillor's hand, her palms sweaty beneath the Salarian's leather-like touch.

Sparatus, the surviving Turian Councillor, stepped forward next from his place in line. "Commander Shepard," he drawled, "on behalf of the Turian Hierarchy and its people, I hereby award you with the Nova Cluster, our highest military honour." He fastened a spherical gold badge representing a cluster of stars to Shepard's jacket, the stones embedded within the precious metal refracting the lights above the stage to cast a glow of colours across the curtained walls surrounding them. "May you wear this honour with pride, and may it let all races across the Galaxy know that you are a friend to the Turian people, and the reason that we are all alive today."

Careful not to wince as Sparatus' talons dug into her soft skin under his handshake, Shepard murmured her thanks and straightened herself, her remaining knee and its prosthetic equivalent threatening to shake as she felt her posture begin to falter.

The Asari Councillor stepped forward next, her hands delicately cradling a thick necklace that bore a shield-shaped pendant from its apex. Shepard bent forward slowly to allow the Asari to place the accolade over her neck. "Commander Shepard, it is with great honour that I present to you on behalf of the Asari Commonwealth, the greatest acknowledgement that we can bestow upon a daughter of Thessia, the Shield of Athame." The Asari smiled warmly at the Commander, gently prodding the pendant so that it faced forward around Shepard's collar. "May the light of the Goddess shine on you as you continue to shield and protect those around you, and may it symbolize to everyone how thankful the Asari people are to you for saving Thessia."

Hackett moved down from his position at the podium in order to secure a familiar-looking medallion to Shepard's jacket, the Commander gulping as her eyes caressed the outlines of the platinum star she recognized so well. "On behalf of Earth's Systems Alliance," Hackett's voice rumbled, "I hereby present you with our highest military honour, the Star of Terra. An award only bestowed to recognize the courageous and distinguished service of an Alliance soldier who has risen above and beyond the call of duty. There are few recipients of Earth's most highest military honour, let alone one who has been deemed worthy of action and heart to receive two. May it forever symbolize the place you have cemented in human history."

Sounds of surprise emerged from the watching audience as Wrex moved forward next, the looming figure of the larger-than-life Krogan leader followed closely behind by the Quarian, Volus, Hanar, Drell, Elcor and Batarian Councillors. They jostled each other somewhat awkwardly as they gathered around the warlord, looking slightly nervous in their first official event since being invited to join the prestigious ranks of the Council.

"Commander Shepard," Wrex bellowed, his already loud voice causing the audience to cringe as he overcompensated for the amplification of the stage's sound system. "We stand here today, united as one Galaxy, a result of your unwavering determination to repair the bridges that had arisen between our races." Shepard's old friend paused as he glanced down, referencing his pre-written speech on the datapad that he held between his large claws. "The result of your hard work led to a united front between all races, such likes that has never been seen before in the history of the Galaxy. It was only fitting, therefore, that an award was commissioned in your name, to be presented on behalf of all of the united races of the Citadel Council." Wrex scratched his faceplate, his voice uncharacteristically formal as he delivered his first speech as the Krogan Councillor. "It is thereby the honour of all of the united Citadel Council races who stand beside me today, to present you with the most supreme award ever to be commissioned, the Sword of Shepard!"

Among the deafening applause that had erupted from the audience, Kaidan could not help but grin widely from his seat in the front row as he saw Shepard cringe at the name settled upon the accolade. She looked slightly overwhelmed and clearly embarrassed as the Volus Councillor crept forward towards her, brandishing a frame almost as large as himself that housed an impressive platinum sword within it. Unable to bend forward to receive it, Shepard smiled awkwardly at the Volus as he stood on his toes so that she could take the frame, the rest of the Council members moving forward to shake hands with the Commander as she tucked the award under one arm.

"Let the Sword of Shepard forever represent that despite the differences in our races, past quarrels and even blood shed in the name of war, it is not impossible for a Galaxy to stand united and as one!" Wrex continued. Discarding his datapad on the podium behind him, the Krogan beamed his gnarly grin at the watching crowd. "And while I am here, let us also acknowledge the important role that the Krogan race have played in preventing Palaven and other Council planets from succumbing to extinction! Thanks to the acts of this soldier standing here before us, the Krogan people are back in business!" Wrex finished his speech with a flourish as he smashed his fists together, a mixture of laughter and disapproval radiating from the audience. Shepard couldn't help but smile at Wrex's tact, chuckling softly to herself as the race leaders promptly pushed the Krogan warlord off to his seating at the side of the stage.

Hackett returned to the podium, clearing his throat to silence the audience as everyone buzzed in response to Wrex's departing words, a smile threatening to spread across the Admiral's face as he watched the Krogan's retreating back. A silence fell across the spectators as a bright light from the stage's ceiling turned to illuminate Anderson's memorial, while a ceremony official moved forward to carefully place a framed medallion next to Anderson's urn.

"For his courageous and unwavering service on Earth during the Reaper Invasion, going above and beyond the call of duty expected of an Alliance marine, it is with honour that I present the Star of Terra posthumously to the late Admiral David Anderson." The audience burst into applause, respectfully falling silent again as Hackett opened his mouth to continue. "Earth's Systems Alliance acknowledges and commends the Admiral for his invaluable leadership role in coordinating troops on Earth whilst Commander Shepard rallied the Galaxy for a united front. If not for the actions of this man, Earth would have succumbed to the Reapers." Hackett paused before gesturing in Shepard's direction. "I now invite Commander Aurora Shepard of the SSV Normandy to speak an eulogy for Admiral Anderson, on behalf of the Council and Alliance." The Admiral turned to Shepard where she had remained standing after receiving her accolades, holding out his hand to take her framed sword from her in order to free her hands.

Silently handing the large frame to Hackett, Shepard took a deep breath and limped forward to the podium. Turning her gaze to the holo of her old friend on the memorial beside her, Shepard closed her eyes momentarily to collect herself, trying to mask a sniff as tears threatened to form in the corners of her eyes. Kaidan nodded to her from his seat in the front row, his familiar face a comforting salve on her nerves.

"No matter what planet we took our first breath on, what colour our skin is, and what culture we embrace," Shepard began slowly, her amplified voice trembling with emotion as it resonated through the top level of the tower, "we can all agree that the definition of a hero is considered the same." Squinting her eyes against the flickering lights of the galaxy's media where she stood at the centre of the stage, Shepard clenched the polished metal of the podium tightly as the lump in her throat threatened to mask her voice. "A hero is a person of great courage, admired for their outstanding achievements and noble qualities. Admiral David Anderson was a hero, in all definitions and in every sense of the word. He was an honourable man, an outstanding leader, and the epitome of courage and kindness..."

* * *

With Anderson's memorial concluded, the traditional gathering to celebrate the Admiral's life had commenced in a private bar situated on the skirts of the Presidium, boasting a spectacular view of the Lake and repaired gardens. Making the most of her first proper outing since being placed on bed rest, Shepard mingled around the party, receiving endless congratulations and handshakes from everyone she passed, her protruding belly parting her a path through the small crowd like Moses and the Red Sea.

"You did fantastic, Shepard," Kaidan muttered warmly into Shepard's ear, his lips against her skin causing her nerves to tingle at the contact. Shepard smiled weakly as she chewed on the crust of a tart she had skimmed off a passing waitress, satiating the fierce hunger that had overcome her as she had waited for the memorial to finish. The newest accolades fastened beneath the collar of her dress blues' jacket hung heavy, tugging at the fabric so that it pinched at her neck. She ignored the rash beginning to form on her sensitive skin as she downed the rest of the canape, her eyes automatically scanning her surroundings for another passing tray.

"I need a drink after all of that," Shepard sighed. "A non-alcoholic drink," she added quickly, as Kaidan raised an eyebrow. "To toast to the crew with. Go and find them, Kaidan? I'll be right behind you." She ignored the hint of skepticism that crossed Kaidan's features before he turned and disappeared into the small crowd, turning on her heel and targeting a waiter as he passed with an array of different coloured drinks.

Reaching for a glass of juice, Shepard gasped as she turned and walked face-first into the tall frame of an Asari that had appeared behind her, sloshing the bright orange liquid over the front of her dress blues. Quickly reaching into her pocket for a serviette that she had stashed during her pregnancy-fueled quest for munchies, Shepard quickly rasped an apology as she dabbed at the her soiled jacket, the cold liquid causing goosebumps to form on her sensitive skin.

The Asari's face broke into an enormous smile as she waved off Shepard's apology. "Commander Shepard," she purred, reaching out a hand in greeting. "It is an absolute honour to finally meet you, after all of this time." She ignored the puzzled look on Shepard's face as the Commander looked at her quizzically. "My name is Matriarch Eileithyia. My sister Aurelia is the newest Asari Councillor. You might have seen me around before, since the end of the Reaper War I have been helping co-ordinate locals and refugees to other parts of the Citadel that were undamaged. I was also a very, very good friend of Admiral Anderson's. I knew him for more years than I can even remember."

"Pleasure is all mine, Matriarch," Shepard replied warmly, quickly wiping her juiced-hand on her pants before taking the Asari's outstretched hand in hers in a firm handshake. "I'm afraid I haven't seen you around before, although I haven't been on the Citadel often since the end of the war. Admiral Anderson never mentioned you either."

"Well he wouldn't now, would he?" the Asari chuckled. "Unless Anderson mentioned his extensive list of friends to you? And his favourite underwear colour?" Matriarch Eileithyia laughed at her own joke, ignoring the strange look that crossed Shepard's face before her.

Remembering that Anderson had never even mentioned Kaylee Sanders to her before she had met his love interest at Grissom Academy, Shepard smiled and nodded. "Good point."

The Matriarch's eyes moved from Shepard's face down to her heavily pregnant belly between them, her pristine white teeth flashing as her face extended into an even greater smile. "Oh, Goddess! My sister told me that you were expecting Commander, but I almost didn't dare to believe it given how injured you were after the war ended. My warmest congratulations to you and the father. You look positively radiant, Commander."

Shepard chuckled, shaking her head. "You'll forgive me if I don't believe you, Matriarch. I've barely seen the sunlight for the past eight weeks. My stalwart Major over there has kept me confined to strict bed-rest on what he thought was the doctor's orders. I've been itching to stretch my legs, get out and about."

"Well, what better place to stretch your legs than here on the Citadel? Have a birthingmoon- I believe that's what humans refer to it as? Do you have anywhere that you can stay? You would be most welcome to stay with me."

"A baby-moon? The thought had never crossed our minds, to be honest. Anderson technically gifted me his apartment on the Silversun Strip, so we certainly could, I guess. Assuming it's still even there."

"It would be. Sunset Strip was surprisingly untouched in the invasion, believe it or not. One of my daughters has an apartment located there as well actually. You will want take some time for yourself before your child is born, Commander. And your Major over there, if he is who I suspect he is," the Matriarch winked. "From someone who has had four children... it won't be the same after your child arrives. Trust me."

"You might be right," Shepard agreed, reminiscing of the good memories she and her crew had made during their last shore leave on the Strip. Her abdomen moved as her baby kicked, as if in reminder of the extent of the good memories that had been made. "You certainly haven't painted an exciting picture of parenthood Matriarch, if I need to have a holiday before my child is even born," she chuckled, rubbing her belly.

Feeling a warm hand snake about her waist, Shepard turned to find that Kaidan had crept up behind her, her nostrils tickling at his familiar scent of muskiness and eezo. "Just making sure you're not chugging down a beer while my back was turned," the Major grinned.

"Major Alenko," Shepard smiled as she rolled her eyes somewhat, pointedly holding up her glass of half-empty juice for Kaidan to see. "May I introduce you to Matriarch Eileithyia. She was a good friend of Anderson's, and is working with the refugees and misplaced citizens here on the Citadel. Matriarch Eileithyia, this is Major Kaidan Alenko, my Executive Officer on the Normandy."

"Congratulations on your impending fatherhood, Major Alenko," the Matriarch winked. Kaidan looked at Shepard, surprised, only to have the Commander shrug and take a sip of what remained of her juice. "I hope you are taking excellent care of the soon-to-be mother? Parenthood is a joyous time, and you both have a lot ahead of you. Particularly you, Shepard."

"I assure you that the Commander is want for nothing, Matriarch," Kaidan beamed. Turning back to Shepard, he clasped her free hand within his own. "I hate to interrupt, but we should probably go and congratulate the crew for their awards, Shepard..."

"Mmm. Yes," Shepard replied, swallowing a mouthful of juice. "If you would excuse me, Matriarch, I should go. It was a pleasure to meet you."

"Yes, yes, absolutely, go to your crew," Eileithyia nodded enthusiastically. "Give them all my warmest thanks and regards! But, Commander," the Asari leaned forward slightly into Shepard's personal space, placing both her hands on Shepard's shoulders. Shepard looked a little taken aback at the Asari's audacity. "I just wanted to say that although I know that we have only just met, given how close we both were to Admiral Anderson, I'm sure he would be happy to know that we had become friends ourselves. If you need anything Commander, anything at all, please don't hesitate to ask."

"Of course," Shepard gulped, slowly inching away from the Asari. Eileithyia let go of Shepard's shoulders, beaming at the Commander as Kaidan led her away.

The Matriarch watched the Commander's retreating form as Kaidan led her through the crowd, his arm ever protective around Shepard's waist as they stopped to join the Normandy's crew as they mingled and drank. Shivering a little as she felt her body suddenly grow cold, Eileithyia raised a dark-coloured handkerchief to her face and quickly wiped away the small trickle of blue blood that seeped out of her nose. Her dark eyes narrowed as they moved to fixate hungrily on the heavy curve of Shepard's swollen belly.

 


	22. Chapter 22

**Another filler chapter (of sorts), and a short one at that. It was hard to lengthen this one, and I am eager to get on with the next few so that I can finish this fic in the next month. We haven't got far to go now before my Shepard's story is finished, we will be commencing the home stretch on the next chapter! =)**

* * *

Gossip and speculation abounded in the aftermath of the broadcasted ceremony and memorial, with what seemed to be the entire Galaxy's eyes focused not on recognition of the accolades given during the service, but on who the father of Shepard's unborn baby could be. The Commander's pregnancy had come as an unexpected surprise to the masses, given that her critical condition in the aftermath of the war had been well known to the public.

"She's not really pregnant, it's all just a publicity stunt," a doctor from Huerta Memorial Hospital had proclaimed when he was waylaid by the media at the end of his shift. "Her stomach shape was not characteristic of a human pregnancy, she obviously had a fake belly strapped on. And there is no way whatsoever that a pregnancy would have survived if the extent of Shepard's injuries was true. I should know. I'm a doctor. Has anyone considered that perhaps she's just overindulged since the end of the War and that it's just a food baby?"

"Who gives a Vorcha's ass who the father of Shepard's baby is? I want to know what business did Shepard have to be getting knocked up anyway?" a male Turian had exclaimed at the camera. "Time spent fraternizing, which goes against all military protocols mind you, could have been used saving more lives! I have never been more disappointed with Commander Shepard in my life!"

The ever-determined media had even done their best to locate known members of Shepard's crew, with Engineer Adams targeted on his way out of a convenience store in the lower wards of the Citadel, his face turning to stone as a group of flycams fixated on his face.

"I, urrr... tha-that... that's not m-m-my place to sa-say," the poor Engineer had stuttered, his eyes darting too and fro as he scanned the group of reporters for an escape.

"You mean that you know who the father is?" a reporter had chirped, shoving her mouthpiece into Adam's face.

"I- no, I don't! I, ummm..." Adam's face literally turned a shade of green, his wrinkled features balking under the blinding lights of the flycams.

"I see, I see," the reporter nodded. "That means that the father was most likely stationed on the Normandy before the war ended." The reporter turned back to her flycam with a wide smile as others around her jostled forward to push their microphones into Adam's face, the Engineer finally managing to scoot off after he found a small escape route among the group. "The search continues, my viewers, the search continues!"

"It's me!" some man that Shepard had never seen before in her life had enthusiastically told the camera, puffing out his chest in pride as reporters flocked to him like a swarm of bees. "I am the father of Commander Shepard's baby! The Commander and I go way back, we've been seeing each other in secret for years!"

"Something you wanted to tell me, Shepard?" Kaidan chuckled as they lay across the couch in the living room of Anderson's Citadel apartment, Shepard's head burrowed into his chest as the unknown man on the screen before them began to go into great detail about the supposed conception of Shepard's baby. The reporters that had latched onto his ridiculous claim listened with their mouths hanging open, the majority of his recount censored out by an endless string of beeps.

* * *

"Oh how I've missed you, old girl," Shepard sighed as she stepped into the airlock of the Normandy, her clothes sizzling as the familiar sensation of the decontamination systems brushed across her skin. She breathed in the thick smell that permeated the bridge, her mind awash with the memories that the familiar scent evoked. Followed closely by Kaidan and Joker as she moved out of the airlock, Shepard grasped her crutch tightly as she navigated herself forward over the metal-grilled floor of the bridge, her eyes drinking in the surroundings of her beloved ship.

Shepard had dropped everything, including a much-craved steak with hot sauce that she had begun to tuck into, to head to the Normandy's dry dock when Doctor Frantelle had called to notify her that their repairs to EDI's Quantum Blue Box had finally been completed. Given that it was her decision that had ultimately led to the AI's demise, Shepard did not want to miss the moment where EDI was officially revived, the circumstances hitting a little too close to home as she was reminded in many ways of her own resurrection by the Lazarus Project. The Normandy had been flown to the Citadel in the weeks following her return, a lack of resources on the war-ravaged Earth unable to meet the extensive list of repairs that were still required. Thankfully, the Alliance docks where the faithful ship had undergone a much needed service during the crew's last shore leave before the end of the war had been left mostly intact and stocked during the Reaper occupation of the Citadel thanks to its location on the outskirts of the Presidium. It appeared that the Alliance were eager to have the famous warship completely restored, not satisfied with the makeshift repairs that the crew had performed in order to fly the ship light years across the Galaxy back home. After relocating to Anderson's Apartment in the Citadel, it warmed the Commander's heart to know that her ship was nearby on the space station in the void above Earth, only a short skycar ride away.

Shepard took her time to roam the metal halls of her warship, Kaidan and Joker trailing behind her faithfully as she stopped regularly to touch consoles or survey the small changes being made to the interior among the repairs. The implant embedded in the back of Shepard's neck buzzed in response to the Normandy's eezo core, her face awash with coloured light as the Galaxy Map activated in response to her presence as she passed. Despite the absence of her crew and the unfamiliar faces of engineers peppering the CIC as they went about their work, Shepard was overcome with a sense of peace, even as she was shaken like a baby rattle as they stepped into the elevator and ascended to the loft.

"You have Prothy the Prothean to thank for taking care of all of your pets since the Normandy has been in dry dock, Shepard," Joker announced, standing at the door of the Captain's Quarters with Kaidan as Shepard limped forward, depositing her crutch against the metal wall beside the automatic doors. "He and Liara have been regularly staying on the ship while Liara gets her Shadow Broker channels up and running again. She's going to establish a secret headquarters here on the Citadel now apparently. And Javik had a little trouble acclimatizing to the weather back down on Earth..."

The Commander took her time to step slowly around her beloved cabin, her fingers gently caressing the corners of her desk and chair as she maintained her balance, her breath fogging up against the glass of her hamster's enclosure when she moved closer to say hello. A frame displaying a copy of her original Star of Terra still remained in the centre of her desk to the right of alcove where she had spent many a night perusing mission reports and figures, as did her impressive collection of model ships. Sighing almost happily as she carefully moved down the steps to collect her N7 hoodie where it sat on the couch, Shepard's mouth spread into a smile as she slipped on her favourite jacket, the well-worn fabric falling short of zipping up across her swollen belly.

Kaidan chuckled from his position in the doorway, looking ever so sexy as he leaned his muscular frame against the metal, his arms folded across his chest. "Once EDI is back up and restored again, I think she's going to have to order you a bigger size, Shepard."

Shepard's green eyes, bright as she blinked away tears welling due to a mixture of hormones and emotions, moved from her king-sized bed where she had spent countless nights entwined with Kaidan to the vast fish tank that spawned the left wall. There was a pause as the Commander watched the bubbling water, the artificial coral and seaweed swaying to and fro with the small currents made by the tank's VI filter. A collection of rotting fish food floated across the top of the water in a thick layer, undisturbed for what appeared to be weeks.

"Joker, where are all of my fish?"

* * *

Shepard stood among the tables and equipment making up the temporary laboratory that had remained erected in the Normandy's AI Core since the warship had returned to dry dock, surveying the different surroundings in the room that housed EDI's heart. The Commander rolled forwards and backwards on the balls of her feet, ignoring the subtle throb of her phantom limb pain beginning to rear as her heart hammered in her chest. The anticipation of waiting for the scientists to active EDI's quantum computer flooded Shepard's body with excitement, her baby wiggling to and fro underneath her skin in reaction to her pounding heartbeat.

The group of ex-Cerberus scientists, ever thankful that the Normandy's crew had rescued them all from a slow death by starvation, had put all talk of resettling and re-integrating into the civilian population aside in order to finish their work on reviving EDI with the fragment of Sovereign that had safely been delivered to frigate. Save for Frantelle's two children who had been left with their surviving grandfather somewhere in Australia, the doctor and his team had remained aboard the warship throughout her extensive repairs on Earth and her journey to the Citadel, eager to bring back the much-loved AI from the grave.

"Our first priority was restoring EDI's Quantum Blue Box," Frantelle had explained to Shepard and Kaidan once they reached the AI Core, Joker bouncing about like an excited puppy behind them as he eagerly tried to peer over their shoulders. "Once we are certain that we have restored her to full functionality as she was she was before the energy wave fried her systems, we can go about restoring her mobile platform for her to take control of again."

"So the fragment of Sovereign was exactly what you needed?" Shepard asked excitedly. "There were no other hiccups once that was secured?"

"None at all," Frantelle replied. "The repairs to her blue box were very straight forward once we were able to dissect the fragment. It just took a little longer than I originally anticipated. Not unexpected of course, given EDI's complexity. Her personality matrices are all intact thanks to the backup hardware of the mobile platform, and she should have most of her memories restored. Of course, we won't actually know without a shadow of a doubt until we restore power to her blue box... but I am willing to bet my right leg that we have been successful." There was an awkward pause as Frantelle realized exactly what he had said, Kaidan quickly glancing over at Shepard in alarm. "My apologies, Commander," Frantelle quickly added as his eyes moved to the prosthetic peeping out from the bottom of Shepard's pants, "I didn't think before I said that..."

Shepard waved his apology away, a large grin spreading across her features. "Well, what are we waiting for?" she beamed, settling herself on an empty stool in front of the scientists and carefully balancing the glass enclosure that held her space hamster on her knees. "Let's fire her up!"

Nodding to the Commander, Frantelle turned to the numerous consoles and electronics that made spanned the length of the AI Core's wall, the scientist's fingers flying across the datapad he held in his hand before he fired up his omni-tool. In response, the sounds of EDI's equipment began to hum and echo around the metallic walls as Frantelle siphoned power to the newly-repaired quantum computer. Shepard and Kaidan waited patiently, the powering up of EDI's systems seeming strangely anti-climatic given the circumstances.

"EDI?" Joker asked tentatively as he moved in front of Shepard, Kaidan and the scientists, his eyes focused on the empty AI holographic interface before him. "EDI? Talk to me? Are you there?"

There was a slight pause before the interface flickered to life. " _Welcome to the SSV Normandy. This is Enhanced Defense Intelligence, also known as EDI, model 92-AIGB. I am ready to assist_ ," EDI's voice drawled monotonously, devoid of any emotion.

The faces of the remaining scientists in the makeshift laboratory fell in their various positions around the core, all eyes fixated on the ship's pilot as Joker's face fell and he slowly slid to the floor. "It didn't work," Joker muttered, his voice sounding strangled. "She's not back, guys. It didn't work."

There was silence in the AI core as Shepard, Kaidan and the scientists looked crestfallen, disappointment thick in the air. As Shepard deposited her space hamster on the desk beside her and took her face into her shaking hands, Kaidan and Doctor Frantelle both bent down on their knees to help Joker off of the floor, Kaidan murmuring what he hoped were soothing words to the Alliance pilot under his breath.

"Is there a particular topic you wish to discuss, Joker?" EDI's voice asked suddenly, no longer monotonous in delivery. The necks of the three men snapped upwards from their position on the floor, all eyes intent on the AI interface positioned between the two looming consoles on the centre of the wall before them.

"Please, stay kneeling," EDI's added, a hint of humour detected in her bodiless voice. "You know that I enjoy the sight of humans on their knees."

Shepard's face broke out an enormous smile as she immediately sat upright, the heavy weight and disappointment that had flooded her chest lifting as the familiar sound of her friend resonated in her ears. The spherical shape of EDI's holographic interface almost seemed to peer down at the three men on the floor, who looked up at her with looks of shock on their faces. "EDI?" Shepard asked, her voice wavering slightly with emotion as she pushed herself forward off of her stool to stand before the AI console, the fluorescent blue light of EDI's holographic sphere basking her face in a warm glow. "Is that really you?"

"Why, of course it is, Shepard," EDI sounded a little confused as she paused, her sphere flickering a little as she appeared to survey the Commander's protruding belly. "You all appear much changed. I see... It is immediately obvious, given your state and my scans of the Extranet, that I have missed something important. You and Major Alenko certainly did not heed any of my gentle reminders to use contraception, and it appears that the Reapers have been defeated. Joker, is there a particular reason why you are crying?"


	23. Chapter 23

**We're on the home stretch!**

**Reviews heavily welcomed. I receive regular emails that readers are following, but I have no idea if it is because you are enjoying the fic or just want to see the ending I have head-cannoned for my Shepard. Would love to know your thoughts on where I'm taking this story.**

**It all sounded a lot better in my head though, trust me! :P**

* * *

_Kaidan barely recognized her._

_He wasn't sure why he would have expected a ghost who had risen from the grave to look exactly like the woman he remembered every night before his mind finally gave in to exhaustion. His memories of Shepard sedated him far better than medication ever could during his bouts of insomnia since her death, his body falling asleep to the thoughts of lying flush against her, his fingers brushing through her thick hair as he pressed gentle kisses along her skin. The Shepard that stood before him, clad in a suit of N7 armor that he had never seen before, surely could not be the same woman he thought he had known so well. A web of newly-healing skin laced across her face, the sheen of cybernetics clearly visible beneath the topmost layer. She wore a Kuwashii Visor, her raven-black locks growing untamed around her face, uncharacteristic of the neat neck-length military cut she once sported before she died. Despite the thickness of her armor, Shepard's frame appeared somewhat smaller, slightly gaunt as if she hadn't eaten properly for months. The fierce aura he could sense emanating from her biotics felt vastly different to the calm and composed force of energy he had become so in tune with during their missions together on the original Normandy. Had it not been for the vivaciousness of her bright green eyes that looked up at him from her pale and freckled face, with that familiar look of fury crossing her fractured features as she seethed from disappointment at not being able to save the colonists on Horizon, Kaidan might have actually questioned if it really were Shepard standing before him or just a look-a-like commissioned to mess around with his still-grieving heart._

_While every cell of his body itched to reach forward and collect her lips under his, Kaidan pushed his emotions to the side and made do with stepping forward to embrace her, his body singing in response as it reeled against the contact of the familiar form of its long-lost lover in the flesh before him. Kaidan felt himself tremble involuntarily as Shepard's lips brushed along his ear and jawline during their embrace, his vision unfocused as he felt her whisper his name against his ear. Her familiar scent of sandalwood soap and the slightest metallic tang of eezo filled his nostrils as she touched him in the manner she had reserved only for him when they were alone, reminiscent of the many times she had done so before she had died. Feeling his body relax unconsciously against his lover reunited against it him, he could no longer deny that this was the Shepard he had loved and grieved for, resurrected before him like the Messiah of old-world religion. The rumours that Shepard was still alive were true._

_Kaidan's vision moved from the sight of the familiar-looking Turian standing behind the Commander as he felt Shepard sigh against his ear, before focusing on the well-endowed woman standing beside Garrus dressed in the armor of Cerberus terrorists. Recognizing the logo, he immediately let go of Shepard, standing back to look her up and down, a mixture of raging emotions rising to the surface as questions began to flood his mind. Why was Shepard here? Was she responsible for the attack on the colonists? Why had she seen fit to seek out Garrus and not him? Why didn't she tell him she had been alive all of this time?_

_Shepard's claims that it had not been her choice had sailed clear over his head, his pride smarting at the thought that she had not loved him enough to bother contacting him when she supposedly regained consciousness. And then there was the admission that she was working with Cerberus. Garrus too. An enraged fire took flame in his chest as Shepard tried to explain that she was only working with the terrorist group to stop the Collectors, the sight of her eyes pleading into his to understand her only fueling the inferno that raged within him._

_Kaidan knew that he would never forget to his dying day the look of utter heartbreak that crossed the Commander's features as he accused her of betraying the Alliance, and of betraying him. The strangled sound that had barely escaped from her lips did little to dissipate the burning fire, his temper getting the better of him as he bid her goodbye from the mount of his high horse. He left the clearing, abandoning the woman he had once sworn his heart to, his emotions and thoughts in turmoil as his heart battled internally with his mind._

_Reaching the collection of pre-fab building on the outskirts of the clearing, a feeling of regret immediately washed over Kaidan after he had walked a good distance away from where he had left Shepard standing forlornly. Try as he could, his pride and loyalty to the Alliance could not dull the painful ache resonating in his chest at the thought of turning his back on the woman he had once- and still did- love. Hearing the puttering of a shuttle behind him, he immediately turned on his heel and raced back to the clearing, only to be met with the sight of a Cerberus shuttle flying off into the distant sky._

_Kaidan punched a stack of crates beside him, cursing himself as the shuttle carrying Shepard disappeared from his view. Barely registering the pain in his knuckles from where his fists had met the thick steel of the crates, he wondered if he would ever see Shepard again._

* * *

Stretched out comfortably on the soft expanse of their king-sized bed, Shepard watched on with amusement as Kaidan attempted to assemble a crib on the floor of the master bedroom of the Citadel apartment before her, his tongue between his teeth as he wrestled to secure a side rail in place. She could sense the Major's patience wavering as her biotic implant buzzed on the back of her neck in response to his, his body enveloped in a thin blue sheen as he grunted and gritted his teeth in frustration, rather uncharacteristic of his usual calm and cool nature.

"Do you need me to come down there and help you, Kaidan?" Shepard asked innocently, trying to mask her amusement. "Surely it can't be more complex than assembling a rifle?"

"You've no idea, Shepard," Kaidan growled, exerting more pressure than he had meant to on the wood of the crib's rail as he attempted to lock it into place against the base. As the thick wood snapped between his hands with a loud break, Kaidan's tanned features looked exasperated as he was left holding the pieces of broken wood, Shepard trying to restrain herself from bursting into a peal of laughter on the bed behind him.

After realizing that Shepard seemed to resent the temporary apartment that had been provided to herself and Kaidan back in Vancouver (which, he suspected, was a result of her forced confinement), the parents-to-be had decided to move into Anderson's apartment for the foreseeable future. The decision to relocate was not only swayed by the suggestion of a "babymoon" by Matriarch Eileithyia, but also by the knowledge that Doctor Michel and Chakwas were located nearby at Huerta should any problems arise as Shepard approached the end of her pregnancy, the date of her ceasarean section looming ever closer and closer. Intent on making the sparse and luxurious apartment more homely, the small number of baby items that Shepard and Kaidan had collected in preparation for the birth of their daughter had already been arranged carefully, with even a change table positioned carefully in the master bedroom's ensuite adjacent to the spa bath. The apartment, full of happy memories made on their last shore leave, felt more like a home than their temporary accommodation back on Earth ever could have. It felt fitting to Shepard and Kaidan that their first few months as a family should be spent in such a positive place, particularly with the knowledge that they had conceived their baby within the very same walls.

Kaidan pushed the parts of the crib aside, his patience spent for the day. "I'll tackle this again tomorrow," he sighed, spiritedly hopping to his feet and sitting himself on the end of the bed.

"You said that yesterday. And the day before. And the day before that..."

"Well, our daughter isn't scheduled to arrive for another few days, so I still have time to try again. Why are you looking at me like you want to eat me, Shepard?"

"Baby wants egg noodles and spring rolls," Shepard smiled, licking her lips as she looked at Kaidan with a hungry expression on her face. "I was distracted watching you wrestle with the crib, but now that you've given up I can't quite ignore the order placed for womb service a while ago."

Kaidan chuckled, leaning across the bed to claim Shepard's mouth with his before moving down to press a soft kiss to her swollen stomach. His features softening as he felt their child move slightly underneath Shepard's skin, he heaved himself off of their bed and quickly pulled on his boots, reaching for his credit chit lying on the bedside table. "Daddy womb service, coming right up. I won't be long. Are you sure you'll be okay, Shepard?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" Shepard asked, her growing hair splayed against the bed as she wrapped her un-maimed leg around a body-length pillow she had retrieved from the depths of Anderson's linen cupboards. "We're not going anywhere. Nothing's going to happen in the half hour it takes for you to get us some takeaway, if that's what you're worried about. You act like the Reapers haven't been defeated sometimes, Kaidan."

Laughing at her bad joke, Shepard waved Kaidan out of the bedroom, listening to his footsteps softly echoing as he made his way down to the first floor and out of the door into the apartment lobby. Stretched out among the soft confines of their bed, Shepard fell into a doze amidst the silence of the apartment as she waited for Kaidan to return, succumbing to the endless fatigue she was feeling as she neared the end of her pregnancy. She could scarcely dare believe that after a long and grueling nine months, her and Kaidan's new future in the form of their united flesh and blood would be cradled within their arms, a living symbol of the new life they were all going to lead free of the threat of the Reapers.

The sound of the apartment doorbell ringing jostled Shepard out of her light doze, the chiming of the electric bell echoing throughout the vast apartment. Surprised, Shepard sat upright slowly, clutching for the datapad she kept on her bedside table that was linked wirelessly to the door's security. To her confusion, Shepard saw the unexpected form of Matriarch Eileithyia projected on the datapad before her, holding up a basket of what appeared to be various fruits to the security camera, her white teeth flashing at the camera in a dazzling smile.

"Lady Eileithyia? I'll be there in a moment," Shepard called, rubbing sleep out of her eyes before swinging her leg over the side of the bed and reaching for her prosthetic limb that was leaning on the bed beside her. The brisk air of the apartment caused a layer of goosebumps to form along the Commander's skin despite the thick fabric of her tank top and tracksuit pants. Slowly limping her way down the stairs with the handrail for support, Shepard carefully walked to the apartment door without her crutch, her mind abuzz with confusion as to why the Asari Matriarch had come door knocking. Shepard hadn't seen Eileithyia in the weeks since Anderson's memorial, having promptly forgotten about the Matriarch soon after she'd first met the woman.

Reaching the console that opened the automatic doors of the apartment to the lobby, Shepard activated the security systems, the metal doors whizzing open to reveal the large figure of the Matriarch. Her dazzling smile grew wider as her dark eyes locked onto Shepard's bright green ones, quickly surveying the Commander up and down.

"Lady Eileithyia?" Shepard greeted her, barely able to mask the surprise laced within her voice. "I wasn't expecting to see you. How did you find me...?"

"Contacts, my dear Commander Shepard, contacts. I come bearing gifts!" Eileithyia smiled, thrusting the basket of fruits into Shepard's face, catching Shepard unawares as she clutched at the basket in surprise. "It is _so_ good to see you again. Both of you." The Matriarch's dark eyes moved from Shepard's own again to caress the protruding belly between them, seeming to almost stop herself from reaching forward to touch the small sliver of stretched and exposed skin peeking out from atop of Shepard's tracksuit pants.

"Is there something I can do for you, Lady Eileithyia?" Shepard asked, feeling slightly unnerved as she felt the Asari taking in the sign of her pregnant belly, balancing the basket of fruits in one hand. She gripped tightly onto the door's security console beneath her other hand for balance, wishing she hadn't left her crutch upstairs.

"As a matter of fact, there is." Eileithyia paused, peering over Shepard's shoulders to quickly glance around the apartment behind her. "Are you home alone, Shepard? Major Alenko is not with you?'

"No... he, uh, went to go get us some takeaway for dinner," Shepard blinked, her senses prickling at the strange behaviour being exhibited by the Asari. "He'll be home soon. Was it Kaidan that you wanted to see...?"

Eileithyia reached forward to rest her free hands on Shepard's shoulders, the Commander oblivious to the fact that the Asari's right hand appeared to be curled around something tightly. "Than it is time," the Matriarch announced cryptically, her face hardening into a chilling look of determination before she opened her hand and plunged the syringe she held deep into the skin of Shepard's arm.

Shepard gasped at the unexpected stab of the needle penetrating her arm, the basket of fruits falling to the floor to roll in every direction beneath her feet. Cradled carefully by Eileithyia as the muscles of her body seized up involuntarily beneath her skin, she was guided slowly to the floor by the Asari to prevent her from falling in a crumpled heap. Shepard's head reeled before her vision unfocused and turned to black, Eileithyia's smirking face the last image the Commander saw before she lost consciousness.

* * *

_Kaidan gasped for air, his bleeding head cradled protectively by Shepard's arm as she screamed for an emergency evacuation into the comm piece of her Kuwashii Visor. The upturned Mako that they had sought shelter against from Harbinger's lasers shuddered amongst the blasts, Kaidan's ears ringing at the sounds of ongoing battle and shouting soldiers that pressed on towards the Citadel beam behind them. Beside Shepard, Garrus threatened to keen over in shock, the Commander reaching out to hold the Turian's head upright before murmuring something in his face and nodding to him in encouragement. Garrus pushed himself to his unsteady feet as Shepard pulled Kaidan up effortlessly, supporting the combined weight of himself and his heavy armor with her smaller frame. As they quickly limped across the battlefield, the familiar shape of the Normandy flew through the sky to circle around them before slowly descending to hover above the ground in the direction that the squad headed, safe from Harbinger's infra-red sights thanks to the Reaper IFF installed within the ship's systems._

_It took a moment for Kaidan, among the stabbing pain of his head laceration and the beginnings of a concussion, to realize that Shepard had instructed Garrus to support him as she moved his weight off of her, relinquishing the Major into the Turian's hands as she stood at the bottom of the cargo bay door._

Shepard! _Kaidan had cried out, overcome with fear as he realized that Shepard was going to continue in the push on to the Citadel beam. Arguing with her to retreat them was futile._ Don't leave me behind! _he had begged, his voice cracking with strain and emotion._

No matter what happens, _Shepard whispered, reaching forward and cupping his cheek lovingly beneath the thick ablative ceramic of her armored hand, her voice barely audible over the sounds of carnage in the background_. Know that I love you. Always.

_Pulled away forcefully by the injured Turian as the Commander screamed at them all to go, Kaidan barely caught sight of the bright white lights embedded in the back of her Rosenkov armor as Shepard catapulted herself off of the rising cargo bay door, landing on the shuddering terrain of the battlefield beneath the ascending ship._

_Kaidan vomited spectacularly onto the floor of the Normandy's cargo bay, barely supported by Garrus as he struggled in vain to return to the closing doors in order to follow Shepard and pull her back onto the safety of the Normandy. His heart screaming within his chest, the Major was overcome with a sense of foreboding that he would never see his Shepard alive again._

* * *

"Remove her fake leg," a familiar voice barked, Shepard barely registering the feel of her carbon fibre prosthetic being yanked roughly off of her maimed limb. "Don't make it any easier for her to escape."

Shepard struggled to open her eyes, her lids heavy, her vision glassy as she tried to squint as best as she could through the gap her lids yielded. Try as she might, she could not move her head, let alone the rest of her body. Despite her semi-conscious state, Shepard felt a surge of relief as her baby kicked her painfully in the ribs, gasping for breath at the sharp pain.

"The EEG of the baby is going off the charts," an unfamiliar voice murmured. "I guess that they were right about the imprinting of the Catalyst on the fetus. This baby has more brain activity going on at the moment than you would expect to see in fully grown adults. Absolutely incredible."

"Of course they were right," the same familiar voice from earlier continued to bark. "We wouldn't be going to all of this trouble to secure the child for them if there was any shadow of a doubt that the Catalyst hadn't imprinted upon it now, would we? Now, is the ship ready to depart? I didn't pay for this vessel to remain in dry dock, we need to be on our way. Make sure the Commander is comfortable, I don't want to risk her getting hurt."

Shepard's eyes involuntarily closed again as the thick cloud of haze resettled upon her consciousness, the rough hands of her captors holding up the dead-weight of her body to tuck a pillow beneath her heavy head. The drug that she had been assaulted with continued to circulate within her bloodstream, imprisoning her and her unborn child within her body.

* * *

"Honey, I'm home!" Kaidan chuckled to himself as he unlocked the apartment with a wave of his hand, his biometrics registering in the console positioned by the door. Unsurprisingly, he was met with an eerie silence not uncharacteristic of such a vast and luxurious apartment. Kicking off his boots by the grand piano situated to the right of the entrance behind the formal lounge, he quickly made his way through the apartment past the large fireplace and kitchen to the stairs that led to the master bedroom, his socks barely audible against the polished floorboards. The smells of Chinese takeaway began to permeate the atmosphere as Kaidan climbed the small flight of stairs to the bedroom, stopping short when he reached it to find the bed empty.

"Shepard?" Kaidan called out, depositing the bags of takeaway on the floor beside the bed before he peered into the ensuite, sure that Shepard was probably occupied in there on one of her many, many toilet trips.

There was no sign of her.

Slightly puzzled, Kaidan activated his omni-tool to open a comm link to the Commander, darting around the apartment quickly to inspect every room for any sign of Shepard. As his omni-tool disengaged in response to an interruption to the channel he had opened, his heart began to pound wildly as fear began to creep forward into his mind, his respiration rate picking up as he ran back to the flight of stairs leading to the bottom floor.

_Don't jump to any conclusions, nothing bad has happened to Shepard_ , Kaidan told himself, crossing the distance from the bottom of the staircase to the security console at the front door. _She's probably just popped out for a breath of fresh air. Just check what time she left, she'll be back any minute._

Entering his personal code to access the apartment's security systems, Kaidan quickly scanned the logs of the console, his own entrance to the apartment newly registered on the list. Twenty minutes before that, record of a visitor accessing the doorbell. Shepard's biometrics were listed as having opened the doors.

Kaidan's heart sank as he tried to retrieve footage to see who the unexpected visitor was, noting the corrupted files of recent security video that were indicative of an obvious wipe in haste to cover someone's tracks. Catching sight of something blood-red out of the corner of his eye beneath him, Kaidan bent down to retrieve an apple that had appeared to have rolled underneath the console.

He couldn't fathom why there would have been an apple in the apartment. Shepard hated apples. Unless...

His blood pounding in his eardrums, Kaidan began to panic. Unable to explain the strange sense overcoming him that Shepard and his child were in danger, he hastily opened up a secure comm channel using his Spectre authorization to contact Admiral Hackett. There was no doubt in his mind that someone had taken Shepard and his unborn child. And unless he acted fast, he knew he might never see them both again.


	24. Chapter 24

**I will admit, this chapter is a lot less refined than I would have liked, but after reading through it several times I didn't feel I was able to improve much more on it at the present time. And I was rather eager to get it out too, to be honest. I know how painful cliffhangers can be. & God knows I have crammed so many into this fanfic it isn't funny! =)**

* * *

Kaidan's skycar swerved haphazardly through the Citadel traffic, its panicking driver intent on reaching the Normandy's dry docks come heaven or hell or any driver that dared accelerate too slowly in between. Endless, illogical thoughts and scenarios ran through his mind as he trembled in his seat. He knew, without shadow of a doubt, that Shepard had been taken against her will. Not only because of the wiped security footage, but also because of the un-explainable intuition he harboured when it came to the love of his life. Kaidan had physically felt when Shepard's life was extinguished during the destruction of the original Normandy before it was even confirmed, and had felt an undeniable change in his body in the days following the annihilation of the Reapers as Shepard lay dying among the remains of the Crucible. It was a phenomenal connection that seemed to transcend space and time, akin to the likes of the "space magic" that Shepard had used to joke so often about.

Who had taken Shepard? What did they want with her? Kaidan's first thoughts immediately turned to that of Cerberus. Despite the Alliance's confidence that their attack on the human terrorist group had been thorough, they could never be certain that the head honchos of Cerberus had been killed during the final assault on the Illusive Man's base. After finding the Project Core` defectors who had managed to survive amongst the systems of the Galaxy, who was to say that other cells hadn't managed to escape, led by agents whose loyalties remained to the Illusive Man's ideals?

Accelerating the skycar faster than he had ever dared to before, Kaidan's thoughts turned to the continuing chaos and misplacement of the Galaxy in the wake of the Reaper War. Perhaps Shepard had been kidnapped for a ransom? Given the state of some areas of the Citadel that remained in ruins and the endless refugees still requiring permanent settling on the space station and back on Earth, Kaidan could believe that the Savior of the Galaxy would be held for a hefty ransom of Alliance resources and credits. Not the smartest thing to do, kidnapping a war hero in order to ransom for an abundance of supplies, to be sure. Had it not been for the fact that it was Shepard, Kaidan's compassionate heart could have understood the desperation that would drive a person to go to such an extreme, if it were indeed the case.

Among his panic at realizing that Shepard and his baby had potentially been kidnapped, Kaidan had contacted Hackett from the Sunset Strip apartment block, the Admiral immediately commandeering C-Sec forces to search heavily populated areas of the Station for any hints of the Commander's location. With only the corrupted security files to go on, Kaidan's next thought had been to hasten down to the docking bay where Shepard's ship sat suspended, the extensive list of system repairs needed to class the old girl ready to recommence duty almost complete. Running as fast as his legs could carry him, Kaidan flew up the gangway connected to the Normandy's airlock where the ship slumbered in the dock, bypassing security guards positioned around the docking bay with a wave of his identification. Tearing down through the bridge and into CIC, Kaidan bit his lip as he tried somewhat to still his trembling and breathless form, stopping himself from reaching forward to pry open the elevator doors as they slowly and painstakingly opened. His thick boots thundered along the metal of the second floor as he burst through the Normandy's medbay, his destination situated just behind it.

The surprised faces of Frantelle, Joker and Tali turned around to see Kaidan doubled over before them in the doorway of the AI Core, gasping for breath after his long sprint from his skycar. Behind them, perched on her seat in the alcove of the Core with a small hatch open on her chest to reveal her innards of circuits and wires, EDI's mobile body sat at attention. The AI peered over the trio's shoulders at the Major, her humanoid eyes narrowing in concern.

"Major Alenko?" EDI asked, her holographic visor flickering slightly as she removed Frantelle's gloved hand from the inside of her body, the doctor's work on her systems forgotten at the unexpected arrival of the Major. "Is everything alright?"

"EDI," Kaidan spluttered. "I- we- we need your help. I think someone has taken Shepard."

* * *

The dilated blood vessels within Shepard's head pounded heavily, causing the Commander's vision to distort when she finally awoke from her drug-induced stupor and opened her eyes. Her vision fuzzy, Shepard was met with the sight of a sterile and sparsely-furnished medbay located in what appeared to be a space faring vessel, if her biotic implant tickling in response to the presence of a nearby eezo core was any indication. Immediately sitting up as fast as she could with a head that felt full of lead and the limitations imposed by her swollen stomach, Shepard was stopped from going any further by her maimed limb missing its prosthetic under her pant leg, and the heavy metal chains hanging from the ceiling above the large gurney she had been laid upon.

Ever the soldier despite her limited condition, Shepard blinked quickly and scanned her surroundings, the rather empty medical bay giving no indication as to which ship she was on or why she had been brought there. Her eyes turned to the heavy restraints that bound her hands together. Struggling against the thick chains, Shepard grunted in frustration as she was unable to break out of the damage-resistant metal, her breath coming out in gasps as the baby put pressure on her diaphragm, limiting the depth of her respirations.

The medbay doors hissed open behind Shepard as she pulled and tugged at the restraints, her teeth gritted in determination as she tried to utilize her biotics to break apart the bindings. The metal links around her wrists refused to budge against the intensity of the localized mass effect fields that she tried to concentrate on the curved metal, hissing under her breath when the chains did not yield. Shepard shook and tugged at her restraints where they snaked up before her to a large hook on the ceiling, her limited strength thanks to the paralyzing effects of the drug unable to detach them from where they were secured into the thick metal ceiling above her.

"Ah, you are awake," Matriarch Eileithyia greeted her, surveying Shepard up and down from her position at the doorway. "Just in time- we are about to depart the Citadel. How are you feeling, Commander?"

"How do you think I'm feeling at the moment, bitch?" Shepard growled fiercely, the events of the past hour flooding back to the forefront of her mind as she glared back at the Matriarch, anger beginning to boil deep within her stomach. In any other situation, the intensity and fierceness of Shepard's voice would have turned anyone else before her into a cowering mess, but Eileithyia just blinked back at the Commander, her features cool and collected.

The Matriarch tutted. "I will ignore your crudeness, given the circumstances. I must apologize for my earlier actions, Commander. It was necessary. Rest assured, however, that you will not come to any harm."

"Bullshit. Tell me where the fuck I am. And where you're taking me. Now."

"You'll forgive me if I refuse to divulge that particular information to you at present," Eileithyia replied, stepping away from the doorway to move to a sterile counter at the opposite side of the room. From her gurney, Shepard caught a holo image of what appeared to be a baby on the terminal before the Asari, curled up in fetal position as if it were still unborn. Her breath hitched in her throat as she felt her own baby elbow at her from beneath her protruding naval.

"What do you want from me, then?" Shepard asked, her voice turning somewhat weaker in tone as she rested her arms limply at her side, her energy spent from her struggling.

"I thought you would have guessed by now, Commander. I want the child that you carry within your womb."

Shepard balked, her freckled face turning pale. "You... you want my baby? _Why_?"

"I suppose you deserve an explanation, given the circumstances," Eileithyia sighed, perching herself on a wheeled stool just out of arm's reach of Shepard. "Where do I even begin... I supposed I should start by saying that my masters have been watching you for some time now, Commander. Ever since you came into contact with the Catalyst, and activated the Crucible to destroy the Reapers."

"How do you know...?" Shepard breathed in surprise. Eileithyia ignored her question with a wave of her hand.

"Despite the secrecy surrounding your pregnancy, it hasn't quite been kept under wraps as you and your Human leaders thought it would be, even before the publicized award ceremony a few weeks ago," the Asari continued. "We among the Council and its sub-departments have known for some time, ever since you were awakened from your coma. Given the intimate connection you held with the Catalyst's AI as you communicated through it and learned of its origins and intentions, my masters are certain that in an attempt of self-preservation and in order to secure the knowledge of past races that have been harvested, the Catalyst has imprinted on your unborn child. Thus, she holds the key to rebuilding all that was destroyed when you activated the Crucible... The knowledge of how to rebuild the mass effect relays, the histories and technologies of past races that succumbed to previous cycles, the threat that organics pose to all life as we overreach themselves and create synthetics." Matriarch Eileithyia paused, the awed expression spreading across her face a stark contrast in comparison to the look of panic that had fallen upon Shepard's.

"My masters are aware that they have lost valuable knowledge over the generations thanks to their seclusion from the rest of the Galaxy, biding their time until the Reapers were destroyed. What your baby now possesses is the key to setting them on the path to reviving their empire, greater and more advanced than the likes of any race that this Galaxy has ever seen before."

Shepard shook her head when the Asari paused again to catch her breath. "You're crazy," she gulped. "The Catalyst did not imprint onto my baby. Such space magic is impossible." Despite physically voicing her denial, Shepard was unable to believe her own words as they left her lips. Her internal logic battled against the details she had just been told. The Matriarch must have had access to Shepard's final mission report that outlined the events that had transpired within the Crucible... But surely Eileithyia must have fabricated herself that Shepard and Kaidan's baby was anything more than a helpless little infant, biding her time inside the protection of Shepard's body until she was ready to enter a threat-free world? The mere thought that the AI who had created the Reapers had knowingly bestowed all of its knowledge onto her unborn child was insane. Ludicrous. Laughable.

Eileithyia leaned forward into Shepard's face, her warm breath fanning against the Commander's cheeks. "Is it really that hard to believe?" she almost whispered, her dark eyes looking intently into Shepard's green irises. "After your intimate conversation with the Catalyst AI, after the choices it offered you of integrating into the Reaper consciousness or of merging synthetic and organic life together, is it really unbelievable that imprinting upon an organic is possible? That the AI would, in its last attempt to preserve itself, pass all of its knowledge and memories onto the unborn baby it sensed growing within your womb? You're a smart woman, Commander. You won't admit it, but you know what I say is the truth."

"Then who are your masters?" Shepard asked, still in disbelief. "What do they plan on doing with my baby?"

Eileithyia's expression turned blank as her features fell, a mask overcoming her mature features. " _We are the Apex Race_ ," the Asari's voice drawled, the sound of the familiar and chilling voice sending shivers down Shepard's spine. " _Your child belongs to us; she will lead the first tribute upon our return to our rightful position as the first race of this Galaxy._ " There was a pause before the Matriarch burst into a fit of coughing, Shepard's heart sinking impossibly further as she watched Eileithyia wipe away the trickle of blood that began to seep out of her nose.

"The Leviathans," she whispered hoarsely.

A lightbulb went off in Shepard's head. Her situation suddenly all made sense. The makeshift bedding and obvious occupation that had been present in Doctor Bryson's laboratory. The missing Leviathan artifact from its pedestal. Matriarch Eileithyia's role in coordinating the settling efforts of misplaced refugees and citizens on the Citadel. Her suggestions of Shepard and Kaidan baby-mooning on the Sunset Strip before the birth of their child, their location confirmed as her pregnancy reached full term. Playing on Shepard's trust by introducing herself as a good friend of Admiral Anderson, crouching to spring when Shepard was alone and vulnerable...

The Asari pushed herself off of the stool, discarding her blood-stained tissue on the floor. "Enough questions. My masters have waited long enough. It is time."

"Time for what?" Shepard barely dared ask, dread flooding in her chest as her eyes focused on the vial and needle that the Asari retrieved from the counter-top drawer. There was a brief silence as Matriarch Eileithyia held a syringe before her, squinting her dark eyes to focus on the measurements as she withdrew the liquid from the vial. She flicked at the syringe with her fingernail in an attempt to expel the air bubbles that had accumulated in the drug, spraying minuscule amounts over the polished metal counter before her.

"Your child will be the one to breach the darkness that has settled upon us, the weapon for my masters to wield so that they can once again take their place as the Apex Race of this Galaxy. It is time for you to deliver her to me, Commander."

Stepping across the medbay to the doors, Eileithyia stood back as she waved in a group of heavily clad mercenaries to enter the room with her free hand. Shepard did not recognize the poorly painted insignia's plastered over the breastplates of the armor that the guns-for-hire appeared to have cobbled together in the wake of the War. Unconsciously pushing herself as far away as she could from the approaching mercenaries and Asari on her gurney, Shepard's hands clutched protectively at her swollen stomach, desperate to shield her child from the imminent danger that approached them.

"Hold her down for me, please."

The sound of struggling and Shepard's screaming permeated throughout the metal hallways of the ship as the vessel detached itself from the clamps in the Citadel dock, its engines spluttering as it slowly inched its way through the expanse of space in the void outside of Earth. The metal hull of the ship seemed to shudder as the force of the blasts generated by Shepard's biotic shockwaves radiated from within the medbay, eventually falling silent as the frustrated Matriarch encased Shepard in a stasis bubble with a wave of her free hand. Suspended in the static mass effect field, Shepard's wide eyes glanced over at the group of mercenaries she had managed to incapacitate during her biotic assault before moving to fixate on Eileithyia, who approached the frozen soldier with the syringe held at the ready in her hand. The Commander's biotic implant sizzled painfully on the back of her neck as the ship entered faster-than-light travel, promptly soaring towards the edge of the Sol System.

* * *

Kaidan watched impatiently as the Normandy's AI set to work on retrieving the corrupted footage from the holodisk that he had dismantled from the apartment's security console, the metallic features of EDI's humanoid face grim as she pieced together the data that had been wiped. What once would have taken the AI only a number of seconds seemed to now stretch out into endless minutes, due to what Kaidan assumed to be either because of her recent revival or an impressingly efficient program used to wipe the data.

Joker, Tali and Garrus hovered about in the CIC as EDI concentrated, the Turian having joined the small group from his calibrations in the gun battery when he had learned that the Major had come bursting onto the Normandy, adamant that Shepard had been kidnapped. Kaidan felt like he was going to explode inwardly, silently willing the AI to work faster. Tali and Garrus' positive assurances that the Major was overreacting despite the evidence of deliberate tampering fell on deaf ears as he paced the floor of the CIC, his biotics threatening to flare as he stressed.

"I have it," EDI finally announced, nodding before her at the ship's status display situated in the middle of the CIC. Centered between the consoles where a three-dimensional image of the Normandy usually blinked from beside the Galaxy Map's interface, a frozen image of an Asari holding up a basket of fruits to the apartment's intercom projected before them.

"I have been unable to retrieve any original footage from the apartment's intercom," EDI explained to Kaidan as the Major hastily stepped up beside her for a clearer view of the image. "Unfortunately that data was irretrievable. Whoever deleted it however was not as thorough with the other camera located on the opposite side of the lobby, one that yields full view of the front door."

"Who is that?" Tali asked, peering at the paused image before them, her shielded head cocked to the side.

"Judging by the curves and bosom on the woman, that's got to be a Matriarch," Joker replied with a small wolf whistle, his fingers stroking his beard as he scrutinized the image.

Kaidan's heart palpitated within his chest as his eyes settled across the familiar features of the Matriarch. "She... I've seen her before, after Anderson's memorial. Shepard was talking to her. Said her name was Eleviah or something like that... Why would she be at the apartment?"

EDI commenced the video, the occupants of the CIC silent as they watched Shepard receive the basket of fruits off of the Matriarch, looking slightly taken aback at the unexpected visit. Their voices sound scrambled through the retrieved audio. "EDI, can you clear up what they are saying?" Kaidan asked, stepping closer to the projection as he tried to read their lips.

There was a hair-raising sizzle of static before the voice of Shepard, albeit high-pitched due to the corrupted file, asked the Matriarch if she was there to see Major Alenko.

Tali and Garrus gasped loudly in unison, Joker's hand flying to his mouth to muffle his exclamation of shock as the Matriarch appeared to impale something into Shepard's arm, kicking the fallen basket of fruit on the floor to the side as she cradled the Commander gently to the ground as her muscles seized. Heart in his throat, Kaidan could barely watch as a number of armored mercenaries filed out of the lobby's elevator, hoisting up the still form of the Commander and promptly disappearing with her out of the camera's view. Tucking the retrieved basked of fruit under one arm, the steel-like features of the Asari paused to look up at the camera situated behind the apartment's intercom, her face expressionless as she raised her omni-tool before her. The footage cut out with a flicker.

"Spirits," Garrus whispered. "Shepard..."

"Is there any way of knowing where they took her?" Kaidan asked EDI in a strangled voice, his pulse thumping almost deafeningly in his ears.

"Scanning... The apartment lobby and Strip cameras show the mercenaries carrying Shepard onto an unmarked shuttle. I should be able to hack into Citadel security footage and follow them to their location," EDI replied, her eyes transfixed on the wall of the CIC before her.

"We have to get Shepard back, Kaidan," Tali gasped, stating the obvious as her glowing eyes locked onto Kaidan's face, her voice trembling.

"Security footage shows Shepard being taken onto a Kowloon-class modular conveyor ship in the Tayseri Ward cargo bay," EDI relayed as she scanned C-Sec systems for footage. "Designated _MSV Pegasus_. Shepard appears to still be unconscious. We've just missed its departure, Major. The ship left the docks less than ten minutes ago."

Kaidan barely caught himself from punching the console before him, vainly trying to steady his breath as a plethora of images of Shepard and his child being tortured or killed assaulted his imagination. He turned to the AI.

"EDI. I need you to find us a way to follow that ship, wherever it's going."

"At once, Major," EDI nodded, hastily crossing the CIC and into the Normandy's bridge in order to settle herself at her preferred chair beside Joker's pilot seat.

Kaidan gestured behind him where his Turian and Quarian squadmates stood, still in shock. "Garrus. I need you and Tali to make sure the armory is sufficiently stocked."

"We're on it, Kaidan."

"Joker, find the crew. We're going after her."

"Find the crew, got it," Joker replied, turning around slowly and beginning to hobble up to the Normandy's bridge. The pilot paused for a moment, shaking his head. "Uh. Deja vu," he muttered before continuing, the doors of the airlock hissing closed behind his retreating back.

From where he remained in the CIC, Kaidan stepped up to the Normandy's Galaxy Map, his face suddenly unreadable as his features bathed in the coloured lights projected by the Map's interface. A thick sheen of Kaidan's biotics shimmered around his muscular form as his implant flared in fury, his brown eyes focused on the last image of the Asari Matriarch before she had cut the footage.


End file.
